


he was pointing at the moon but i was looking at his hand

by CallicoKitten



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Depression, Frisk just wants everyone to be happy, Gen, Gender-Neutral Frisk, Post-Pacifist Route, Sans Has Issues, it's not all in second person btw, poor little trooper
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-05
Updated: 2016-02-11
Packaged: 2018-05-05 04:17:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 43,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5361110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CallicoKitten/pseuds/CallicoKitten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>you wake up again and it's sunny outside.<br/>you pack your things.</p><p>- </p><p>sans goes back for gaster, frisk follows after, a new game begins.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> beta'd by the lovely [oclomia](http://oclomia.tumblr.com/) who is awesome and has my eternal gratitude

here's the kicker: for a little while, you actually believe things'll be okay this time.

it's not your first time on the surface. you've been here before in different worlds, different timelines, counting down the days until you jerk awake back in Snowdin - your bed, your sentry station, that stupid lumpy couch you've never managed to replace.

you're not surprised anymore, it's business as usual as far as you're concerned, but this time it  _feels_ different.

it's Frisk, you think. they're different this time.

not content, in all the lives you've known the kid, they've never been  _content_. they're always determined, always trying something new, a new path, a new ending, and you've lived through them  _all._

but this time there's something about them - and you wouldn't call it resignation, it's not quite that, not quite negative, but that's the most fitting word - you figure, anyway.

you're not gonna ask them about it, you doubt they'd tell you. in some ways Frisk's an open book, but in others the kid plays their cards close to their chest.

they come to you one evening though, a few weeks after the barrier breaks and hug you tight, whisper,  _no more resets, i promise._

and you've never told them (not _this_  them anyway) outright that you know, that you remember (in snippets, in bits and pieces of jumbled sounds and lights and images), but you've let them know you know  _something._

you want to scoff, but instead you hug them back,  _whatever you say, kiddo._

it'll come out someday, you're sure. the reason no one's come looking for Frisk since they've been back, the reason Frisk prefers monsters to humans, the why behind it all, behind them climbing the mountain and saving them all. but for now Frisk seems happy, and you're not about to take that away by scrutinising every inch of their existence.

Pap's happy too, and Toriel and Asgore and Undyne and everyone, really. you all live in the same town, practically the same street. you and Pap and Tori and the kid in one house. Undyne and Alphys in another. Asgore unofficially living at yours and everyone pretending to ignore the nights he's mysteriously  _not_ found sleeping on the couch.

Mettaton's off being a rock star and a talk show host and someone teenagers have bedrooms full of posters of. he's more of an ambassador than Frisk has been (which, rightly so, you guess, who appoints a  _kid_  as an ambassador, anyway?), and the rest of the monsters are slowly spreading out, slowly finding their place in this new world.

and here you are, trying your damn best to smile and act like this is everything you've always wanted.

your house is better than anything you could have had in the underground, big and spacious and warm. you've got the attic room so you can spend those sleepless nights glued to your telescope.

you get a job at Tori's school, as a janitor/librarian mostly, because she won't fire you no matter how many times she finds you asleep in the broom cupboard. she keeps trying to bully you into teaching science since it's just her and Temmie at the moment.

(yeah, Temmie.  _teaching._ she's got a degree, apparently, and you're initially dubious that  _anyone_ could sit through an hour of arithmetic in temmie-speak, but you fall asleep in a cupboard in her classroom once and overhear her speaking perfect English during lessons. she threatens to glomp you to death if you ever tell anyone.)

you only stop by Grillby's new place when you're really desperate. try to limit yourself to a few drinks and hey, you slip up sometimes but Grilbz is a pal and he calls someone - usually Undyne and never Pap - to come get you, to let you get your shit together before someone important gets hurt. Undyne threatens a lot to beat you up if you don't cut it out but she never does.

(you kind of wish they would, though.

you want Toriel to get mad at you for sleeping on the job, to tell you to quit being so bone idle (heh) and straighten the heck up.

you want Undyne to beat you black and blue (if you could, you know, bruise) for what you're doing to yourself, for what you're doing to Pap behind his back.

you want Grillby to call your brother so he can - no. no, you don't want that. you couldn't handle that. you  _never_ want that again.

 _i'm sorry, Pap, i promise, never again, alright? i'll never get that bad again._ )

\----

(on the bad nights, the really bad ones, you creep out of the house and walk to the mountain.

you stand at the entrance to the underground and wait.

you stand and you stare down into the darkness because you're sure there's someone you forgot about, someone you left down there in the endless caverns and encroaching darkness.

but no one comes and you have to get back before Pap worries.)

\----

you only brought a few things with you to the surface. as far as you know, Pap brought everything (his room is practically an exact replica - god, it was a lot of effort dragging that awesome race car bed of his all the way up to the barrier).

you keep it simple - a box of old photographs you'll never show anyone and a box of journals full of tally charts and scrawled messages you don't always remember writing. they make it real. make the other timelines more than just something you made up, more than just nightmares.

(the journals and Frisk, you guess.)

and your telescope.

it was a gift, you know that by the note written on the under-side of the scope -  _sans, someday, i promise you'll see real stars._ in some timelines you don't find the message. in most you do.

you work out slowly it must have been from _him_.

you've got a whole notebook dedicated to it, to _him_. whoever _he_ is or was and whatever happened to him.

you remember him in increments - in the spaces in between the timelines, the spaces in between existence. he dogs your steps, hovers over your life, an ever-present shadow. like the movement you catch out of the corner of your eye or a dream you're trying too hard to remember.

you don't know who he was to you but all you know is you want him back. you want him back so much it  _hurts_  like a gaping hole inside you (aside from your hollow chest cavity and the empty sockets and the- the holes in his hands-)

you need him back. you  _need_ him like you need Pap and Frisk and Tori.

you fucking  _need_ him like you've never needed anyone before and that fucking _terrifies_ you.

but he doesn't exist. never has. not anymore. not here, in this timeline. no one remembers him, except for you.

And the only damn proof you have is scrawled on the bottom of your telescope.

\----

you start to slip.

(hell, you start to fucking  _free-fall._ )

and it's inevitable, really, the surface hasn't appealed to you for god knows how long, there's nothing you've got up here that you didn't have down there. down there you had slips, days you felt like you knew what was going on - what happened to _him_. you had the sense of something lurking just out of sight. you had memories of different Frisks and different events, and up here you've still got them as memories but they don't happen anymore outside of your dreams.

(or maybe they do and you just can't tell anymore.)

maybe you're crazy.

maybe Pap bought you the telescope (he didn't - you've asked again and again across timelines and he didn't). maybe you made up the other timelines. maybe Frisk's just a weird kid who doesn't have the heart to tell you you're batshit.

you begin to find yourself at Grillby's earlier and earlier, longer and longer (and you go to other places but people mostly stare after a while and it gets to the point where you can't deal and you wonder why you were so desperate to get up here in the first place).

and people come to fetch you when you've had too much, mostly Undyne (who joins you every now and again, drinks you under the fucking table and talks your ear off about Alphys). but sometimes it's Toriel, tight-lipped and frowning and using her teacher-voice (and it makes you want to curl up and  _die_  because you're not a little kid. you should fucking know better, you should have developed coping skills or some shit like that).

and then Frisk turns up.

 _you ever think, kid,_ you say to them, bleary and slurring and sad,  _that you didn't save everyone after all?_

the kid's quiet for a minute, head bowed, fringe obscuring their eyes, and even in your state you regret what you've just said.

 _hey,_ you start.  _you know i didn't-_

but the kid says in that soft, whispery voice of theirs,  _i didn't._

they say it firmly. they say it finally. they say it with more heaviness than any kid should ever have in their voice.

 _but i promised,_ they say, pushing themselves out of their chair and standing.  _and so did you._

you follow them out, and when you get home everyone is so quiet and patient and gentle with you it makes you want to break something.

\----

you get a name. it's scrawled on the pages of half your journals.

_Gaster. Gaster. Gaster._

\----

a bad day turns into a bad week turns into a bad month turns into a really, _really_ long evening at Grillby's.

you get home and dream about smashing your telescope and screaming, except maybe it's not a dream because you wake up and Pap's sitting at the edge of your bed with his head in his hands and  _fuck,_ you want to scream because if anyone else had made him feel like that you'd have given them a hell of a bad time.

you want to say something, anything, but your head feels like it's about to burst, and Pap's not even looking at you, and what would you even  _say_?

sorry i'm such a fuckup.

sorry i can't be like you.

sorry i can't be happy.

i'm sorry, i'm sorry,  _i'm sorry._

 _i tried_ , you want to say.  _i really did, i really fucking did._

but you didn't. you didn't try  _at all._ you've never tried. not really.

 _Pap_ , you croak.

he doesn't look at you.

(maybe he doesn't hear you, maybe you don't actually make a sound, all you know is that it  _hurts_ andyou can't do this.

you can't stay here.

not anymore.)

\----

you wake up again and it's sunny outside.

you pack your things.


	2. Chapter 2

**[1 New Voicemail - Fish Face]**

_Hey, lazybones. Your brother asked me to check in on you this morning after your little tantrum, which, didn't I tell you I'd kick your bony butt if you put him through that again? Consider your ass-kicking scheduled! Anyway, since you weren't at home I'm on my way to Grillby's. If you're there I'd start running._

\----

**[Missed Call - Pap]**

\----

**[1 New Voicemail - Tori]**

_Hi, Sans. It's Toriel. But I suppose you knew that. Listen, I know you must feel awful about what happened the other day, but you should know we're not mad. We're just- we're just worried about you. Call when you can._

_\----_

**[Missed Call - Frisk]**

 ----

**[2 New Voicemails - Fish Face]**

_Yo! Sans! You still haven't turned up, so, you know, get in contact or I'll be forced to track you down and drag you back by your sorry little bones._

…

_No, seriously. Get back here, asshole._

_\----_

**[3 Missed Calls - Tori]**

**[1 Missed Call - Frisk]**

**\----**

**[1 New Voicemail - Alphys]**

_H-hey, uh, e-everyone's starting to get pretty worried over here. Y-you've been gone a few days and- well, I just thought...l-look, I know how it feels to w-want to- well, to need **alone time** and I- well, if you- if you need to talk to s-someone who gets it, then...not that I know for sure...if- if you're fine just ignore this message but call someone, okay? A-and if not then you- you have my number. I'll pick up, I promise. Uh- I'll go now._

**\----**

**[1 New Voicemail - Fish Face]**

_This isn't funny anymore._

\----

**[1 New Voicemail - Fluffybuns]**

_Uh, howdy, Sans. Toriel thought you might- well, you might pick up if it was me. I'm not sure why. But boy, you've got us all worried. So, uh, call your brother. Or Toriel. Or someone. Come on, don't give up like this._

_\----_

**[1 New Voicemail - Unknown]**

_Ugh. I **told** Alphys there was no point in  **me** calling. She thought the unknown number might “catch you off-guard” **.** She really is a moron sometimes. Anyway, Sans, darling, everyone is worried about you, so call them so they'll stop bothering me about it._

_\----_

**[4 Missed Calls - Frisk]**

**[1 Missed Call - Pap]**

**[3 Missed Calls - Fish Face]**

\----

**[1 New Voicemail - Tori]**

_Sans, it's been a week. We're worried about you. If it's something we did, if it's something you need to do, that's fine, just please. Call us, let us know you're safe. Your brother is going spare. Be safe._

**\----**

**[1 New Voicemail - Alphys]**

_Okay, it's been a really long time, and Undyne and you-your brother are...it's really upsetting them, and I know I'm the **last** person who should l-lecture others about communicating, but...you know, I never really appreciated how m-much people cared about me until I- Well, you know. A-and I wish I'd known sooner because if- If I had, I could have saved myself a lot of t-trouble, s-so I thought...it might be the same for you if you **share** your problem, then...I'm sorry._

\----

**[1 New Voicemail - Fluffybuns]**

_Toriel wants me to break down the door to your room._

_\----_

**[3 Missed Calls - Toriel]**

**[1 Missed Call - Pap]**

\----

**[1 New Voicemail - Frisk]**

_…_

\----

Frisk woke up to the sound of birds singing. They were still unused to it - the bright sunlight streaming through their windows, the feel of the breeze on their face, the freshness of the air - even though they had only spent a few weeks down below.

(The same few weeks, over and over.)

In the underground, birds only sang in Asgore's throne room, where sunlight filtered down from the surface. It had been almost like stepping out up above, all those yellow flowers blooming everywhere. They had bloomed around the village Frisk had lived in too, and Frisk had always liked them. They were bright, cheerful. Like the sun.

They weren't so keen on yellow flowers anymore.

For a few moments, they lay in bed, gazing up at the ceiling. Papyrus had helped them cover it with glow-in-the-dark stars, hefting Frisk onto his shoulders while Sans lazily pointed out that  _none_ of the patterns they'd made were real constellations (though Papyrus had been  _adamant_ that he'd seen a constellation in the shape of his face at least  _once_ ) _._

("yeah," Sans had drawled. "in your dreams, Paps.")

A few of the stars were starting to peel at the edges, and they looked far less magical in daylight. Frisk could probably ask Toriel to do something about that.

That's when they became aware of the distant pounding coming from somewhere in the house.

Frisk sighed. They knew  _exactly_  what that was. They'd heard it almost every morning for a week or so. Usually, Toriel would have talked Papyrus down by now, but she must have left early this morning to run errands. Frisk rolled over, and sure enough, there was a handwritten note on their bedside table:

_Little One, popped to the market for some fresh food. hoping to find snails! you know, when you mentioned humans didn't eat them much I didn't think you meant never! Love, Mom. x_

Frisk smiled at the note, reaching forwards to trace the little kiss with their finger. It was nice to have a family at last. The banging came again, louder this time, more insistent, ruining Frisk's moment. Giving up a restful morning as a lost cause, they rolled out of bed and padded out of their room.

Papyrus stood on the upstairs landing, hammering on Sans' door. "COME ON, SANS. This is  _not_  funny anymore! Open this door!"

Frisk stood and watched until Papyrus noticed them.

"OH! HUMAN!" he cried. "Did I wake you?"

Frisk shook their head.

"THEN I SHALL CONTINUE!" He turned back to the door. "You see, I, the GREAT PAPYRUS, have worked out the only place my brother could possibly be! I know him better than he thinks!"

Frisk frowned.

"I know, I know. You're thinking,  _but Papyrus, if Sans was in there wouldn't he have come out by now?_ Human, let me tell you, my brother can be stubborn! BUT HIS INTELLIGENCE IS NO MATCH FOR MINE. This is the one place he thinks we won't look!" He pounded once more. "COME ON, SANS! I HAVE BESTED YOU! He must be in there," Papyrus muttered.

Frisk sighed. Sans' room had been locked since he left, and they had heard Toriel and Asgore arguing about it late at night. Toriel wanted to break it down, to see if they could find anything -  _what if he's **hurt**_ \- but Asgore seemed a little reluctant to go charging in -  _but it's **his** room, Tori. We can't just go snooping! It's impolite!_  _I'm sure he's fine..._

Frisk had been hoping Sans would have turned up by now. When he'd first gone missing they'd assumed he was just having a long overdue breakdown. Frisk understood. It was difficult enough to get over being able to  _control_ timelines, let alone having  _no_  control and remembering...however much Sans remembered. Not everything, Frisk thought.

(Frisk hoped.)

But enough.

Papyrus kept knocking.

Frisk kept watching.

Sans would turn up soon, he'd have to. He wouldn't just _leave_  his brother. Frisk might not know much about him, but they knew that.

"Come on," Papyrus urged quietly, still knocking. " _Come on._ "

This was probably Frisk's fault. They'd tried. Tried to get the best ending, tried over and over again, and this was it. But even now, they hadn't pleased everyone. Hadn't saved everyone.

It didn't really make sense though. There must be something Frisk had missed _. Someone_.

They reached out and tugged on Papyrus' scarf.

Papyrus narrowed his sockets. "You don't think he's in there, do you?"

Frisk shook their head sadly.

They'd always known they were missing something with Sans. Even after they found his secret machine.

"Don't give up so easily, human! Determination is always rewarded!" Papyrus insisted, but eventually, he let his arm fall. "I suppose you're right. If he was in there he'd have done  _something_ to stop me knocking by now."

Frisk reached out and patted his arm.

Those people in the photo, the ones Frisk had never seen before and never seen since, they must have something to do with it. Frisk had thought they might turn up in Alphys' hidden lab among the amalgamates that crept about down there, but they hadn't. Never once.

(There was that room though - that one full of fog - Frisk could have sworn there was someone watching. Someone tall, someone who wasn't there when the fog cleared. The feeling of a long hand tucking them in when they'd stopped to rest...)

"I just don't understand," Papyrus said bleakly. "Where could he have gone?"

There was only one place Frisk could think of that Sans might have gone, but they hoped they were wrong. With a heavy sigh, Frisk pulled out the key. They'd held onto it all this time, ever since Sans had given it to them in Asgore's palace. There was no guarantee it'd work, of course, not up here, but things surrounding Sans didn't always make sense, and Frisk had high hopes.

Papyrus stared at the key for a few moments, uncomprehending. Then he gasped. "You  _stole_ a key to his room?"

Frisk rolled their eyes.

"He  _gave_ it to you?" For a moment, Frisk thought Papyrus would need convincing, but then he beamed. "He must consider you a friend then! Human! I'm so happy for you! And for him!  _Finally,_  a true friend for him!"

Frisk unlocked the door.

Sans’ room was much like it had been in Snowdin - bare walls, an unmade bed. A self-sustaining tornado made of trash. Clothes and trombones were strewn about, and every few steps Frisk heard the unmistakable wheezing of whoopee cushions beneath their feet.

There was only one thing that hadn't been there down below: Sans' telescope.

It was positioned under the skylight; they'd left Sans this room specially when they were moving in. He'd looked happy, Frisk had thought, that first evening when Frisk and Alphys had joined him to stargaze while Papyrus and Undyne wrestled (well, Undyne threw Papyrus about a while he flailed but Frisk  _thought_  it was supposed to be wrestling).

"Ugh." Papyrus looked around. "He is so  _messy_!" He set about searching through things, pausing here and there to haphazardly shove odd items of clothing into the dresser, balling up dirty socks and tossing them into the laundry basket he seemed to have conjured from nowhere. "I should clean in here more often..."

Frisk watched him for a few minutes, then crossed to the telescope, making sure to check the eye-piece for ketchup. They peered into it and frowned, heart sinking. It wasn't pointed at the sky as it should be.

Instead, it was pointed at Mt. Ebott.

Frisk closed their eyes. They knew where Sans was headed.

"I don't  _understand_ ," Papyrus said, gazing around at the empty room. "All his things are here,  _where_  would he go?"

Frisk sighed, one hand resting on the telescope. "He went back."

\----

it's eerie, walking through New Home now it's cold and empty. it hasn't been long enough for decay to set in, but it's coming on, you can feel it. it's hanging in the air, silent and oppressive. eating away at you.

you take a shortcut to Snowdin town and somehow, even bleak and dark and empty, it still feels more like home than up above.

your lab is as you left it, dusty and cold and full of memories you can't quite grasp. it's funny, this place, there are some timelines you don't remember it immediately, others where you don't forget about it at all. some timelines you stumble across it by accident - through experimentation or through your journals. some you don't find it at all.

like everything else about you, you only know about it when you know about it.

and how can you know the unknowable?

there are reams and reams of pages written in hands scattered about the place. once upon a time you understood them as easily as you understood English, but now you're staring at the little pictures and all you're seeing are question marks.

the machine is covered by a sheet. has been since that day.

(what day? you don't remember.)

there are drawings of it in your books - that machine - here there and everywhere. chicken-scratch theories and rambling and huge, great warnings.

you spread them out and get to work.

(and here in the lab you swear you feel a tendril brush up against your cheek.)

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i'm playing around with time and distance a little in this fic just because i think it makes more sense if frisk's journey took a week or so across the underground rather than like a few hours. 
> 
> thanks a bunch for the comments guys! i know i dont reply to them but they mean way more than you guys could ever imagine.
> 
> things might get a little more coherent from this point onwards because for the past week or so ive been pretty ill but im starting to feel better so yay for sense?

Frisk wrapped their arms around themselves.

This was definitely their fault somehow.

They'd gone through everything they had. They'd kept as many notes as they could (not at the time, nothing but their memories - and Sans', apparently - seemed to survive the resets) since they got back. Jotting stuff down in crayon. Timelines and little snippets.

At first Frisk had been trying to find a way to save Asriel.

It wasn't fair that they all got their happy endings and he was still down there alone. None of this was his fault, not really. But Asriel wouldn't even be Asriel anymore, not without a soul, and what good would that do anyway? Toriel would understand, but it would break her heart. Asgore would never stop trying to get his son back. It would make them miserable, Frisk saw that, and they'd been miserable such a long time already.

Frisk shuddered.

"Well, I'm not going to do  _nothing_!" Papyrus was yelling from the living room. "I won't sit idly by while my brother could be down there needing my help! Besides, it's not like there's anything  _dangerous_ down there anymore. AND IF THERE IS it will shiver before me!"

"I dunno, Papyrus," Undyne said. Frisk could picture her, arms crossed, trying to look disapproving. Deep down they knew that Undyne wanted nothing more than to launch a full scale rescue mission. She'd been kind of bored since they reached the surface, there haven't been nearly enough opportunities for violence.

She was putting on a show for Alphys, Frisk thought. Trying to be responsible.

"Really sounds like he wants to be alone," she finished lamely.

Then Alphys piped up. "I-I don't know, Undyne. I mean, even- even when I thought all I wanted was to be alone, deep down, I- what really I wanted - no, what I really  _needed_ \- was a friend."

"What?! Why didn't you say so?" Undyne exclaimed.

"You see, Undyne? Sans needs us!" Papyrus announced. "And  _I_ am not about to let my brother wait! He could be in danger!"

"Guess that's settled then! We're headed back home! Er, underground. Operation Rescue Papyrus' Idiot Brother!" Undyne burst out of the living room, looking more animated than Frisk had seen her in months.

" _Cool_ Idiot Brother," Papyrus corrected, following her out. Alphys trailed out behind them.

Seeing Frisk, Undyne grinned. "You stay here, pipsqueak," she told them, ruffling their hair. "Toriel and Asgore would kick my butt if I let you come and you got hurt!"

Frisk sighed and nodded. They'd always known they wouldn't be allowed to come. It didn't matter, they knew a quicker way to get to Sans. They'd leave as soon as everyone else was gone.

"Yes, human! You stay here! Fear not! We will return victorious momentarily! And when we do we'll have a celebration! With all the spaghetti we can eat!"

"Uh, Papyrus, didn't Toriel ban us from cooking?"

"No, she banned  _you_ from cooking.  _I'm_ still allowed to!"

"Oh, right. Alphys won't let me cook either. We live mostly on ramen!"

Papyrus patted her arm consolingly and Undyne shook her head. "Ah, whatever! Haven't we got a bonehead to save?"

"I-I think we ought to pack some supplies before we g-go," Alphys said timidly. "After all, we don't know how long we-we'll be down there for, and..."

"Great idea, Alphy!" Undyne cried, making Alphys blush. "We've got lots of stuff at ours! Come on, Papyrus!" She barrelled out of the front door.

Papyrus, close on her heels, yelled, "I hope there's spaghetti!"

Alphys lingered, giving Frisk an encouraging smile. "I-I guess I'll see you soon then? D-don't worry. We'll find him and bring him home."

Frisk nodded, giving her the gentlest smile they could muster. They reached out, patting her on the shoulder.

"O-oh," Alphys said. "I'll be okay, d-don't you worry. And I'll take good care of those two." She pulled her phone out of her lab coat. "I'll keep my status updated so you won't have to worry!"

Frisk wasn't sure how she planned to connect to the surface's internet while she was down there, but if there was anyone who could figure it out, it was Alphys. They smiled again and leant forward, tugging Alphys into a hug.

Alphys blushed like she always did and pulled away quickly.

"I-I'll be seeing you."

"Good luck," Frisk called after her.

\----

**CoolSkeleton95 uploaded a photo:**

off to save my brother heroically!

[it's a photo of him and Undyne holding swords.]

\----

**StrongFish91 updated status:**

headed back down under anyone want anything fetched

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

tfw you and the girlfriend are off on adventures!

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

tfw you forget to put all your shows on record!

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

i know i can watch online but its NOT THE SAME

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

pls use spoiler tags when talking about aNYTHING

\----

**StrongFish91 updated status:**

adventures with the gf and ALL SHE TALKS ABOUT AR ETHE SHOWS SHES MISSING

>  **CoolSkeleton95** & **ALPHYS** liked this

\----

As soon as the others were gone, Frisk hurried upstairs and fetched their backpack.

Papyrus and the others were headed to the barrier, and it'd take them a few days to walk from New Home to Snowdin town, where Sans would be. At least, Frisk hoped that was where Sans would be. If they went through the hole they'd first fallen down, it would only take a day to get to Snowdin, so long as the ruins were still open.

They double-checked their phone had batteries (Papyrus had posted another photo of the trio on the way to the broken barrier #roadtrip!) and left a hastily scribbled note for Toriel. They'd thought about calling her, but if they did, they might not leave.

They left the note in the kitchen, pinned to the fridge amongst all the family photos they'd taken since they got up here. Everyone looked so happy in them. Frisk reached out and took one, the one they'd taken the day the barrier broke, the day monsters went free. They folded it carefully and stowed it in their pocket.

They had better get going.

Frisk paused at the front door, hand on the knob. They'd packed all the monster food they could carry, just in case, but that might not be enough. Clenching their fists with determination, they headed back up to their room and reached under the bed for the loose floorboard.

They'd kept almost everything they had found down there. The faded ribbon, the tutu, the cowboy hat. The pan, the notebook, the knife. The stick and the long-dry bandage.

Asriel was still down there. Except he wouldn't be Asriel anymore.

Just because he didn't have access to the souls anymore didn't mean he wasn't still a threat. If it came down to it - if it came down to Sans or Asriel, Frisk wasn't sure they could make the right choice.

But if it did come down to it, they'd need to be prepared.

They reached into the box.

(The knife whispered to them, a small insistent voice in the back of their mind.)

\----

for reasons you don't like to think about, it was always easier to remember when the kid was killing people.

thinking about them now, it's hard to imagine them doing that, so most days you convince yourself they didn't. they couldn't. look at them, they’re a  _kid._ a kid who risked everything to save a bunch of monsters they'd never even met.

but you remember a kid with hollow eyes and a downturned mouth and dusty hands.

you remember finding Pap's scarf blowing around in the breeze, caught under snow and branches. discarded like a piece of trash.

you remember thinking it was a joke. that the dust was just dust and that Pap had grown a funny bone when you weren't looking.

the kid straightened out after that, broke maybe. you're not sure.

all you know is you met them in that throne room wanting to tear them to pieces, but they'd been crying and they'd tried since then, and when you asked why they killed him, the one good thing in this fucked up world they lived in, the kid had howled, had screamed, had begged your forgiveness.

and you'd given it, because deep down you were tired, already tired.

and then there were the others - that came before or maybe after, you're not sure - where the kid didn't stop. where the kid came to you in the palace covered head to toe in dust and there was no one left but you and them and whoever Alphys managed to save.

there was no one left and you killed the kid over and over and over and over and over and over and over.

you killed the kid until you were numb.

you killed the kid until they cracked, fell to their knees and crawled to you, begging you to end it, begging you to make them stop.

but none of that could’ve happened.

Frisk wouldn't do that. you know they wouldn't do that, don't you?

you must have made it up. it must be a nightmare.

maybe you made it all up.

maybe you're crazy.

 _Gaster,_ your notebook insists.  _Gaster, Gaster, Gaster._

in the timeline where you killed the kid, everything was clearer, the anomalies, the sudden end. but when you try to reach for those memories, they fall away, and all you can think of is how small the kid's hands were wrapped around the hilt of that knife.

how small the kid had looked slumped and bleeding on Asgore's pretty floor.

(your socket burning with yellow-blue flames and _you'll show that kid what monsters are._ )

there must have been something you did differently that time. some secret you've hidden from yourself, and you're thinking it probably had to do with Pap's death. maybe it made you more determined, more desperate.

you had nothing to lose, after all.

\----

Snowdin is cold and quiet without Papyrus.

you work in your lab until you fall asleep and then you wake up and you do it all again. you go for a walk once or twice, but nothing feels right, and you're sure you're being followed. you used to feel like that a lot before, but whatever had its eyes on you then didn't make your bones crawl.

 _what if i told you,_  a voice whispers to you while you sleep, _there was a way to get him back, to get what you want?_

you toss and turn but the voice continues.

_we've done it before, you know. a few times, actually. but you wouldn't remember that, i'm sure._

_Frisk?_ you mumble, and the voice laughs. high pitched, grating.

 _come on, Sans, you couldn't forget little old me, could you?_  it laughs again.  _i suppose you could. i'm sure your brother remembers me though. we had such nice little chats._

you lurch upright, awake (you think), but the room is empty, and the only thing that's new is the soil you've tracked in from outside.

(except you haven't been outside for days.)

\----

They’d fallen, the first time they came to the underground. Frisk couldn't say what it was that had first lured them up Mount Ebott's steep sides, but whatever it was, it hadn't prepared them for the steep drop, for landing alone in the dark.

They'd stumbled upon it accidentally; maybe they'd been running from something. Maybe they'd just been running. But when they woke up down there, when they'd first seen that bed of flowers, they knew they were meant to be there.

This time, Frisk was ready for the drop.

This time, they jumped.

It was a long way down and Frisk knew they were lucky to have survived their first fall. If it had been any other mountain they wouldn't have been so lucky.

They landed soft, surrounded on all sides by the flowers, the scent of lemons hanging in the air.

Frisk half expected to see Asriel standing there, tending to them as he had been the last time Frisk had seen him, but that had been a long time ago. Now the room was empty.

Frisk looked back up towards the surface briefly and took a steadying breath, one hand tight on the strap of their backpack.

The air felt different down here now, damp and dusty.

They started to walk.

Everything was still and silent. The puzzles lay abandoned, gathering dust, and Frisk picked their way through them easily. There were no froggits hopping about, no moldsmals to stumble over. Even the training dummy was gone. The sign for the spiders’ bake sale was still there, but their webs were empty.

After a few hours they reached Toriel's house, neat and tidy as always.

They laid a hand on the dead tree out front, its leaves beginning to rot on the ground.

They'd never been able to save the tree either.

Toriel's house was mostly empty. She'd taken most of her things up to the surface with her. Her books, her reading chair, all her clothes and plants. All that was left was the bare bones of a home.

Frisk sat in the room called theirs, surrounded by the old toys of the children that had come before them. They had never been able to get Toriel to talk about any of them before, no matter how long they spent in the ruins.

All they had to go on were faded photos from up above, cautionary tales they used to get people to stay away from the mountain. Guess they hadn't been all that effective.

They lay down on the bare mattress. Toriel had taken the bedding with her.

It was on their bed at home right now.

They curled up, desperately wracking their brain for anything that could help, but this had never happened before. They'd never gotten this far.

They didn't know if they could change things anymore. They had promised Sans they wouldn't, anyway. If this went wrong, there was no going back. No reset.

No waking up on a bed of golden flowers.

They lay there for a little while longer, imagining the smell of butterscotch pie wafting through the tiny house, the distant, comforting murmur of a fire and creak of Toriel's reading chair. She would come in any minute now to leave them a piece of pie, and they would break her heart by leaving.

The door to the ruins was wide open, the forest beyond was cold and foreboding. It was snowing, still snowing, always snowing.

Frisk walked down the path, and behind them, a fallen branch snapped.

\----

in your dreams you remember everything clearly.

there was Gaster and you and the others and Alphys you think but not always.

there was Gaster and you and you were finding a way out of here.

there was Gaster and you and you were going to be heroes.

there was Gaster and you and then there wasn't.

there was just you.

 _and you're the only one who remembers, Sans,_  whispers the voice that keeps returning.  _only you. no one else. and even you can't keep it up._

you want that voice to leave. you want that voice to stop.

(but maybe there is no voice, maybe it's just you and your thoughts and _fuck._ )

you think that maybe you should go home. go back to Papyrus and Frisk and your room up above, but you're just as trapped up there as you are down here and at least here there's no one to disappoint.

 _that's what you think,_  the voice hisses.

it gets to the point that you keep a flurry of bones on hand at all times, just in case.

(god, you're a fucking nut.)

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, when i originally started this fic a week ago i was in a really bad state mentally and physically and like i said last chapter, im feeling _so_ much better it's kind of laughable. anyway, that also means that my overall plan for where the fic is going has changed slightly but dw you sickos it'll still be doom and gloom and sans-centric even if his view point is a little sparse for a while! 
> 
> anyway, thanks a bunch for the comments i really fucking love writing this fic and i love that there are people out there who love it :) so, i was also thinking i could do a little bit of background info in the fic? eg frisk's history with resets et al or is that something you guys would want to be revealed gradually throughout the story? 
> 
> a few things you should know regardless: im gonna be using she/her pronouns for chara and im going with the whole alphys was an assistant to gaster too back in the day (but doesn't remember him at all) theory
> 
> also, for this part im assuming sans doesn't know flowey
> 
> also, also, im sorry (not really) for switching tense all the freaking time idk its just how the characters present themselves for me
> 
> this fic should probably be called "EVERYONES SINS ARE CRAWLING ON THEIR BACKS"

your brother tells you matter-a-factly one day that he can talk to flowers.

he's just a kid at the time, back when time still worked for you (it all goes the same up until a point) so you let it slide. write it off as one of Pap's quirks. he insists, brings it up time and time again and all you can think about are echo flowers - the fields and fields of them in waterfall - someone must have dug one up to trick him (it sounds kind of like something you'd do.)

you thought you knew every inch of this place, every player in the game.

but this?

this is a new one on you.

 _howdy, Sans,_ the flower coos, _the name's Flowey_

it's the voice that whispers to you at night when you're half asleep and trapped in dreams of shifting darkness and dusty hands and your brother's scarf blowing in the wind.

 _of course it is,_ you smirk (bones dancing around your wrists.) _you got a sister named, Petal?_

the flower laughs like that's the funniest thing it's heard in years, _no, my sister's name wasn't Petal._

_\----_

Turns out, the underground without monsters is kinda, really boring. And like, Undyne didn't _expect_ this adventure to be super awesome - she knew that this was gonna be more of a touchy-feely sort of thing (that kind that Alphy won't stop gushing over for _months_ ) but nothing is even _pretending_ to get in their way.

Plus, New Home is kind of creepy now it's empty.

Not that she's scared.

She's  just aware that Papyrus and Alphys might be scared and she's _empathising._

"Wowie," Papyrus comments. "I've never seen this place so empty! Not even when the last human was here!"

Undyne looks over at him, "You remember that, Papyrus?" He'd have been pretty little when the last human arrived. Well, not _little_ little but she doubts Sans would have let him watch the fight or anything.

That kid had been a scrappy little thing with a fun hat and a really painful weapon.

"OF COURSE I DO! It was a very exciting time. I ONLY REGRET THAT I WASN'T OLDER! That human _never_ would have reached Asgore if _I_ was in the way!"

Undyne laughs, "Yeah! You would have stopped 'em, Papyrus. But if Asgore hadn't killed _that_ kid, I wonder what would have happened to Frisk?"

Papyrus looks deep in thought, "Hm. There wouldn't have been six souls to break through the barrier! Maybe we wouldn't have been freed after all!"

"See, you saved us all, buddy! You and your spaghetti!"

"WOWIE! Undyne, you're right! I did, didn't I!?"

" _I_ remember the last child," Alphys says heavily, from a little way behind them. Undyne drops back to put an arm around her shoulders (with difficulty - she has to bend _right_ down.) Alphys has told her most of went down in her lab without getting into the grisly specifics. She still clams up whenever they talk about it too much.

"Being back here is weird, huh?" Undyne says carefully.

Alphys makes a soft noise of assent, "I - I never thought we'd be back. I- I thought this was all over."

"Well, it'll just be a quick trip, Alphys! You can sit this one out if you want. I won't think you're chicken or anything!"

Alphys shakes her head, "No, no I need to do this."

"WHAT ARE YOU TWO WHISPERING ABOUT BACK THERE?" Papyrus booms, frowning back at them. "My brother could be in peril!"

"We're coming, Pap!" Undyne shouts back. She gives Alphys a nudge, _okay?_ Alphys looks up at her, smiling gratefully, _okay._

They catch up to Papyrus pretty easily, near the lifts that'll lead to the core which are predictably not working.

"Oh," Alphys says, "Oh, oh, I should have prepared for this! M-maybe I can - "

"Hey," Undyne says firmly, derailing an Alphys express train to breakdown. "It's not your fault. We all knew this'd take a while."

Alphys falls silent but doesn't look entirely convinced by Undyne's reasoning.

"Besides! Think of all the _exercise_ you'll be getting!" Papyrus shouts excitedly.

Alphys doesn't look too enthused.

By the time they make it down the stairway to the Core even Papyrus looks like he's beginning to run out of steam. Not that he'd ever admit that, Undyne's pretty sure if she didn't say anything he'd keep walking until he dropped dead from exhaustion.

"Hey," she calls. "Maybe we should take a quick break here. Alphys isn't doing so good," Undyne adds, in a hushed tone. Even though it's true. Alphy might be brilliant at lots and lots of things but physical exertion isn't one of them.

Undyne sits down on the bottom stair and after nodding, a little breathlessly, Papyrus joins her.

"HOW YA DOING ALPHYS?" Undyne calls.

"B- be with you in a - ugh - minute!" Alphys calls back, from fifty or so steps up.

"That offer to carry you still stands, you know!"

Alphys makes a distressed sound (and blushes, Undyne knows she's blushing) "I- I - I'm fine!" she squeaks. Undyne smirks.

"Can't believe we have to _walk_ all the way to Snowdin," she mutters to Papyrus as they wait. "We can't even hitch a ride with the River Person." They're up on the surface with everyone else, Undyne assumes anyway.

Papyrus obviously mistakes her annoyance for excitement, "I know! Isn't it wonderful? We'll get to see everywhere again! Of course, it _would_ be nice to get to Sans sooner but... Hm. I wonder if my flower friend is still about. I haven't seen him up above."

Undyne frowns, "Flowers? You mean the echo flowers, right, Papyrus?"

Papyrus tuts, "Oh, you're as bad as Sans! I _know_ what an echo flower is! My friend isn't an echo flower. He's just a flower. That talks."

"A flower that talks," Undyne echoes. She's about to say something more when there comes the unmistakable sound of Alphys slipping down a few stairs.

"ALPHYS!" Undyne yells, leaping into action.

Alphys catches herself before she falls too far, looking down at Undyne sheepishly, "I- I'm alright. Don't worry about me." She picks herself up and winces.

"You sure you don't want me to carry you?"

"I - I..." She sighs, blushing deeply, "Maybe just to the bottom of the stairs? You- You're sure I'm not too heavy?" Alphys asks once Undyne's hefted her onto her shoulders.

"You're light as a feather," Undyne assures her.

\----

_"Timelines jumping left and right, stopping and starting..."_

_Frisk lunges, tears in their eyes. (They just want this to stop.)_

_"Until suddenly, everything ends."_

_They lunge again, someone else's hand moving theirs._

_Sans chuckles, "That's your fault, isn't it?"_

**_No,_ ** _Frisk wants to say. **It's not me, it's not me anymore, I'm not doing this!**_

_"You let me in," the voice in their head whispers. "You let me do this."_

_+++_

Frisk jerked awake.

They'd fallen asleep in Sans' old sentry station, bottles of empty ketchup rattling around at their feet. It was still dark but then again, in the snowy woods between the ruins and Snowdin it always felt dark. It had never felt dangerous though, not after that first day, but now...

The forest didn't feel empty, like the ruins had. The air felt thick and suffocating, the trees felt  like they were waiting for something, it felt like there was someone watching.

They sat up, one hand clenched in the material of their jumper, tried to regulate their breathing. At home, if they had a nightmare, Toriel would be there with pie and cuddles and bed time stories. Or Asgore with tea and strong arms to fight off monsters. Or Papyrus who would talk about how silly it was to be frightened of things in your own head until Frisk fell asleep again.

Or Sans.

His sentry station was warm, that conveniently shaped lamp was still there but it had fallen over in the wind and gotten covered in snow. Frisk had stepped on it earlier, only realising it was there when it shattered under their feet.

They stood up and climbed out the shelter, back onto the path.

It was colder here than they remembered. They should have dressed warmer.

The dog's sentry posts all sat empty, slowly getting buried in snow.  Odd, that Sans' seemed to have escaped that fate.

The Snowman was where Frisk had left him, slightly puzzled that Frisk had returned but overjoyed to learn that his piece lived on in Toriel's freezer. Frisk told him about their plans to use it in the building of another snowman as soon as the first snows came up above. They weren't sure whether it would work but it was worth a shot and the Snowman seemed happy about it.

It would have been easy to just sit with him and talk a while, Snowman never seemed too concerned with what was going on the world so Frisk could have pretended for a little while they were just back for a visit. And, Frisk reasoned, it wasn't really fair to leave Snowman all his own. He'd been alone since they left, after all, and it seemed a shame to rush off.

Snowman didn't seem to mind in the end, though.

Out of habit more than curiosity Frisk turned right after Papyrus' slide and switch puzzle, heading down to the mysterious door in the cavern full of mushrooms. They'd tried endlessly to get it open before, every Reset after the first. They'd even spent one entire loop on it, they'd been so _sure_ that the answers to everyone's happiness lay beyond it.

Frisk pressed their cheek against it and imagined their determination was enough, that the door would swing upon underneath their palms and Sans' friends would be there and Asriel's soul and - and everything.

But the door remained stubbornly shut, like it always did and Frisk moved on.

They met Flowey coming across Papyrus' bridge.  He was waiting on the other side, cheery as ever. Frisk reached into their backpack.

"Howdy, Frisk! Guess you finally decided to come back, huh?"

"Asriel?" Frisk tried, hoping against hope.

Flowey giggled, "Nope!" A flurry of 'friendship pellets' sprang into existence around him. Frisk readied themself to dodge."You know, I've thought a lot about you coming back here, Frisk. I always knew you would. Asriel did too. He waited for you, you know? By the flowers, in the ruins. He waited. He hoped. And in the end you didn't come back for him. You didn't even _try._ But that skeleton? He throws a little tantrum and you _all_ come running! He'd be so _disappointed,_ Frisk."

Frisk knew what Flowey was doing and it wasn't going to work.

" _You_ waited," Frisk corrected, quietly. 

Something flickered in Flowey's expression.

" _You_ hoped," Frisk said.

"No. No, I always knew you'd lose, Frisk. See, that's the difference between us, you still think that you can change things, that you can make things better for everyone, for yourself, but you _can't,_ " he gave a little snort of laughter, "You know, it's funny. I thought when you finally left I'd get the power to Reset back but I didn't. I can't feel it anymore. It's _gone._ And you know what that means?" His face flickered into that monstrous grin of his, " _No second chances._ "

Frisk clenched their hands.

"Boy, it's like a whole new game!  You really think you can do it, Frisk? Save your friends all over again without a massive do-over button? 'Cos I already know you're not gonna be able to save Sans!"

Frisk took a step forward, "What did you do?"

Flowey laughed, "Oh, _Frisk_! I only told him what he wanted to hear! I told him how to save dear old W.D. and, you know what? He _listened._ The poor idiot was so _hopeless_ he _listened_ to me. Great job with that one, Frisk. You really did an amazing job saving him! And _you're **really** not gonna like what I told him._ He didn't. He actually _cried_ , Frisk, can you believe it?"

Flowey swallowed then, smiling smugly, " _Gosh._ This is going to be such fun!" And with one more haunting chuckle, he was gone.

Frisk took off running towards the town.

\----

They've been walking a long time, made it most of the way through the core and Undyne's gotta admit, she's starting to feel it and Alphys is _definitely_ feeling it. She keeps her head low, tail dragging heavily on the ground behind her. It's kinda cute, really, in a way that makes Undyne want to squeeze her or maybe punch something until she feels less... _wobbly._

Mostly though, all she wants is to get Alphys all bundled up and safe somewhere for a well deserved rest. The only problem is Papyrus isn't showing any signs of needing a break yet which Undyne gets. It's his brother out there, after all and Undyne wouldn't be stopping if it was Alphys but Sans might be a mess right now but he can take care of himself and it's not like there's anyone down here to actually _hurt_ him.

They're passing through Mettaton's hotel when she bites the bullet, "We should probably stop for the night. We - uh - kinda need to sleep at some point, you know."

Papyrus grinds to a halt a little way in front of her and turns back to her and practically wails, "Undyne! Not you too!"

Undyne shrugs, wane little smile on her face, "Sorry, Papyrus, but me and Alphy just aren't built like you, I guess. And besides," she adds, brightening, "Didn't we always talk about having a sleepover in a posh hotel?"

Papyrus considers this for few moments, "Well, I suppose we did." He smiles, "We have to find the _biggest, poshest_ room they have! It'll be the only one fitting for us!"

"YEAH!" Undyne cries, punching the air. "This is gonna be the best rescue-adventure ever!"

Papyrus scurries off to find the room and Alphys gives Undyne a grateful hug.

When the room is found Papyrus busies himself with preparing ramen for them all (it turns out that she and Papyrus spent all their time getting pumped at all the provisions they _could_ bring and forgot to actually bring anything - thank god for Alphy!) while Alphys cuddles up to Undyne on the biggest bed either of them have ever seen.

"This place is k-kind of creepy now it's all empty, huh?" Alphys whispers. "I - I've only been here a few times but..."

Undyne wraps an arm tight around Alphys' shoulders, "Don't worry, Alphy. I'm here."

Alphys smiles and presses her snout into Undyne's side, "So, does Papyrus ever actually sleep?"

"I have no idea," Undyne admits. "He's one determined guy."

"I - I suppose. But even the most de-determined of us need rest." Alphys is quiet for a moment and the only sound is the gentle bubble of the boiling water and Papyrus humming to himself. "So, uh, e-earlier I heard you a-and he talk-talking about a flower?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah. Pap said he had a friend he thought might still be down here. A talking flower. Kinda dumb, huh? He's pretty sure it's not an echo flower though."

Alphys nods, swallowing slightly shakily.

Undyne frowns, "Why?"

"N- no reason!" Alphys says, much too quickly. "I - I just... I was curious. I - I've never heard of anything like that."

Alphys has never been very good at lying.

\----

 _determination,_ the flower says. _that's the key. you've always known that's the key._


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm thinking of changing this fics title to [redacted] just so you guys have a heads up on that! might be something better if i can think of something...
> 
> tw for really brief suicidal thoughts

The door to Sans' lab was locked.

Frisk wasn't really all that surprised. They knocked first and then again, louder, but when there was no answer they pulled out the key they still had on their phone and slipped it neatly into the lock.

It wouldn't turn because of course it wouldn't, not matter how hard Frisk tried.

They yanked it out in frustration, kicking at the door, "Sans!"

They had no idea what Flowey had said to Sans but it couldn't have been good.

This was all Frisk's fault! If they had just been _better_ \- if they had just _tried_ harder none of this would have happened! And now there was no going back. Flowey was right, Frisk's Save power was gone. That meant no more Resets. No more do over's.

God, Frisk had messed up so much the first time. Lashing out at a Froggit, sneering at Snowdrake's jokes, not getting the guardsman together. Little things that had a big effect. How were they supposed to do this without a safety net?

There had to be some way to get it back.

Frisk pressed their forehead to the door, "Sans, please."

Around them Snowdin was still and dark and cold. It was spookier here than in the forest, dark windows and cold houses slowly creaking in the breeze. There were still present under the tree in the centre of town, one of the residents had told Frisk they were being left in case anyone wanted to stay behind.

" _Sans_."

He had to be in there. Otherwise why would he bother doing something to the lock? And if he wasn't then -

"I know you're in there, please, Sans. _Please._ "

If Frisk could just talk to him, make him see he didn't have to do this alone...

"Please, Sans, _please,_ " came a mocking voice from behind them.

Frisk turned with a scowl on their face and Flowey giggled, "Oh, don't worry. I'm not here to meddle, just to watch. This is _way_ more fun than our last game!"

Frisk grit their teeth.

"You know, while we wait for your comedian there's a little something I gotta ask you. But first! You have to promise not be mad at me," he giggled again. "Awh, heck. Of course you'll be mad at me! Better just go ahead and do it, huh? Alright, here goes!" Abruptly, Flowey's smiley face turned serious, "What did it feel like to kill them all?"

Frisk paled.

( _Good,_ the voice that tugged at their heart whispered. _It felt **good**._ )

Flowey snorted, "You really thought I didn't remember? Oh, Frisk. I remember _everything_. And - " he added, with barely concealed glee. "Now, so does your _little friend_."

Before Frisk could react, Flowey had vanished and Frisk heard the front door to the skele-brother's house creak open. They spun, running towards the door, Sans met him halfway, blue and yellow flames licking out of his left eye socket.

"heya, Frisk."

\----

**[7 Missed Calls - Mom]**

**\----**

**[4 Missed Calls - Asgore]**

**\----**

**[ 3 New Voice Mails - Mom ]**

_Frisk, you call me back this instant. I'm not playing around anymore!_

_._

_Frisk, please, don't do this to me._

.

_Frisk, dear one, please. I'm coming to get you, please call me back._

\----

The echo flowers are silent. Weirdly, that's the thing that freaks Undyne most about this place.

She's never heard it this quiet before, all there is is the distant roar of the waterfall and if she really, _really_ strains the occasional sloosh of garbage being pulled to-and-fro in the current. Even Papyrus is spooked, he's sticking closer to them than ever.

Alphys is practically glued to Undyne's side, "I - I know it's silly to be afraid. It's just so quiet," she keeps muttering and yeah, she totally blames Undyne telling spooky stories all night for this. (Which, in hindsight, might not have been the best idea.)

"You'll be alright, Alphy," Undyne whispers back, looking down at her. "I'll kick any ghosts that come after us in the _face._ Spooky ghosts, not Napsterblook, obviously."

They had passed by Napster's house a while back, hers too, still somehow smouldering.

"Besides, we're almost there! We'll get to Snowdin and find Sans and then we can all head back to ours and watch - " she stops because Alphys has stopped walking, looking ahead, fidgeting nervously.

Undyne follows her gaze.

Papyrus has stopped, a few feet ahead of them on the walkway, completely rigid.

"Hey! Papyrus! What's the hold up?" Undyne calls, succesfully keeping the tremor steadily making it's way through her body from her voice.

Papyrus turns back to them slowly, "There's - um - I think there's someone up ahead."

Alphys' hand creeps into Undyne's.

"What? There can't be! This place is deserted!"

"I know that but... there's... there's definitely someone."

He looks _freaked_. Way more frightened than Undyne's ever seen him (and they've had _tonnes_ of horror movie marathons together.) Undyne swallows, "Stay here, okay?" she says to Alphys, who nods and gives Undyne's hand a little squeeze before letting go.

Undyne readies her spear as she approaches Papyrus and when she gets closer she realises he's trembling just a little. He points towards the end of the walkway and Undyne squints.

He's right.

There's someone there.

"It's not Sans," Papyrus tells her, in what he clearly thinks is a quiet voice.

The figure has it's back to them, gazing out over the marshes towards Snowdin town. It's small, small enough that Undyne's beyond certain she could take it in a fight (a _fair_ fight anyway, not a fight where one party is constantly _running away_ like weenie.) In the half-light it looks grey.

She edges forwards slowly, Papyrus at her side.

"Should we attack?" he hisses. "We have the element of surprise!"

"No," Undyne whispers back. "Let's see who it is first."

Closer now, Undyne sees something familiar about those spikes, that striped top.

It's the kid. The one from Snowdin that Frisk is always running around with. But it _can't_ be. The kid's parents are more watchful now, they'd never let them get all the way down here without kicking up a fuss.

"Hm?" Papyrus pauses, "Oh-ho! I recognise that child! They are friends with the human! Perhaps they'll know where my brother is!"

That kid is going to be in a whole world of hurt.

Undyne stops creeping and stomps the rest of the way to the kid, "You are in - " but she stops.

Because even this close the kid is all grey. Like all the colour, all the _life_ has been sucked out of them.

The kid turns to her, it's eyes all blank, "Have you ever thought about a world where everything is exactly the same... Except you don't exist?"

\----

_It's not a choice Frisk makes, it's a choice that makes them._

_It's frustration boiling over, it's sitting in that dark space in between the worlds and the resets and the ends and **screaming** for someone, for anyone. It's losing track of time, how many days or months or years have they spent down here jumping through hopes over and over again?_

_It's that voice that whispers, that tugs, that voice that Frisk knows as well as their own. That voice that might have been there before the mountain or might not have been but it doesn't matter now. Before the mountain doesn't matter now._

_There's only the underground. Only their friends._

_Only Flowey's game._

_(And the voice. The voice. Always the voice.)_

_Frisk lets it in once._

_Once fully._

_They lie down and let her take over, let her run the show._

_They just wanted **out.**_

\----

"we've fought before, haven't we?" Sans looked dazed. "heh, heh, i knew it."

There were bones dancing around his hands.

"I'm not going to fight you," Frisk said.

Sans, who was always smiling, smiled wider, "i don't wanna fight you, either, kiddo. but i gotta wonder? would it really be you i'm fighting?"

Frisk drew out their stick.

"guess so," Sans snorted. "or maybe you're just real good at playing pretend." The lights in his eyes flickered out, "either way, you might want to get out of mine."

\----

"Everything functions perfectly without you," the kid says except it feels like the kid isn't speaking, it feels like there's just a voice in her head.  A low buzz that becomes words. "The thought terrifies me."

Undyne raises her spear, points it squarely at the kid's throat. Papyrus is trying to look brave and failing by trembling behind her, Undyne can't blame him. If there wasn't him and Alphys to protect she would have been halfway back to the surface by now. "W-who are you and what have you done with the kid?"  she demands.

The kid that isn't the kid smiles, "I haven't done anything to them. They're fine. They're safe." They don't elaborate and Undyne's about to threaten more out of them when it speaks again, "Your friend is in trouble."

"Wh- What did it say?" Papyrus steps forward, "What have you done with my brother, villain!?"

The kid looks over at him, "You need to take him - you need to take _them_ \- out of here. Tell your brother to forget. Tell him not to think about this anymore."

"Not to think about _what_?" Undyne presses.

The kid smiles faintly, "It's too late for that. I know a shortcut."

There's a sound like nothing Undyne's ever heard before, like something being wrenched apart and then there's a door in the wall.

"Please," the kid says, "Go now. You have to."

"You must be nuts if you think we're going in there!" Undyne says.

"I suppose that's true," the kid says. "Go on, open it. You'll see I'm not lying."

"Pap," Undyne says, nodding to him.

Papyrus edges towards the door, keeping his eyes on Undyne and the kid the whole way. When he reaches it he hesitates for a moment, taking a deep breath before slowly easing it open.

The light pours in suddenly and Undyne flinches back, throwing one arm up to shield her eyes.  "Papyrus, you good?"

"I'm fine," he calls. "But, Undyne! I can see Snowdin town! It's there!"

Undyne has to blink a few times to see anything more than bright white but he's right, it's there. The doorway leads out to the riverbank on the North side of town.

"Th-that's impossible!" Alphys says. She's beside Undyne now, gaping at the opening. "Who - _how_?"

Undyne spins back towards the kid, "How the hell did you  - "  but there's no one there. " _Huh_?"

Alphys tugs at her, "Sh- should we go through?"

"You're the brains here, Alphy. You tell me."

"And quickly," Papyrus says, "I think it's closing!"

The doorways edges are starting to distort, like it's drifting apart.

"Oh," Alphys says, "Oh, oh! I don't know!"

" _Undyne,_ " Papyrus urges.

They're both looking to her and she swallows. On the one hand, stranger things have probably happened than random grey kids with spooky voices being able to open doors that cut across space (not to her personally but she's sure there's probably _something_ ) on the other, a strange grey kid just opened a doorway in thin air leading to somewhere completely different and it could definitely tear them to pieces or something and honestly, this whole thing is just making her head hurt.

It's impossible, right?

Well, except Sans is involved and she's always known there was _something_ funky about the way sometimes it felt like he was in two places at once.

And Papyrus will never forgive her if Sans gets hurt.

Heck, she'll never forgive herself.

She takes Alphys' hand in hers, "We go through."

\----

you always knew the kid'd come after you.

you just sort of figured you'd have fixed things by the time they reached you. you haven't, obviously but you know what you're doing now. even if it is the worst fucking plan you've ever heard.

it'll probably get you killed. you're kind of looking forward to it. going out in a blaze of glory.

but right now, you need the kid to move.

 _come on, kid, don't make me hurt you,_ you say.

the kid doesn't budge, still holding that stick aloft like a godamned sword. like they'll do anything with it (it was always a knife before, glinting in the dark, slashing left and right, leaving little nicks whenever you weren't fast enough.)

but the kid standing before you - that's not _them_. that's not the knife-wielding psychopath that cut down your brother, this is Frisk. you know it is, no matter what that flower says.

you know it is, you tell yourself over and over. it's Frisk.

it's Frisk.

it's _Frisk._

Frisk your friend who saved you and your brother and gave you godamned everything but it wasn't _enough._ Frisk your friend who just wants to help and won't take no for answer and can't keep their damned nose out of everyone's business.

(Frisk your friend who saved you over and over and yanked you back just when you were getting comfy. Frisk your friend who let someone else in, who let someone use their hands to kill your brother, to kill your friends.)

it's _Frisk._

right?

you don't know anymore.

maybe you never did.

maybe it was never Frisk. maybe this was all part of some sick twisted game.

 _move,_ you say and your resolve is crumbling, your voice cracks a little.

the kid doesn't shift.

 _i warned ya, pal,_ you growl. you send a half hearted flurry of bones their way. the kid dodges easily.

(too easily.)

 _i just want to help,_ the kid says and god - _fuck -_ they look so _heartbroken._

 _i don't need your help!_ you send another wave, the kid dodges, you wait for a blow that never comes.

(it must be Frisk - Frisk wouldn't hurt a fly - the other one though...)

 _Sans,_ the kid says. _Sans, please._

 _i have to do this,_ you insist, you do. you have to. you need Him back. you need to make things right. you need this to _stop._

( _my sister was always good at playing pretend,_ the flower had said.

you always knew there was something more to the kid.)

 _i don't want to hurt you,_ you say.

( _please make me hurt you,_ you beg.)

 _i won't fight you,_ the kid says. _Sans, stop. please._

you're wasting time. you need them to **_move._**

with a wave you bring out the big guns. _Gaster_ blasters, you remember now. His voice in your ear, _well, if you won't raise your defence I suppose I'll have to give you **something** to defend yourself with._

it's so fucking _warm._ it's so warm and it's so _real_ that you want to cry.

 _Sans,_ the kid says, sounding very, very small.

you aren't gonna blow them away. you just want to spook them, you just want them to move.

you need them to move.

you raise your hands (you've got good aim, fucking excellent aim, you're just gonna graze him - not even that - you just need to spook him so bad he won't follow you.)

(none of this will matter when you get where you're going anyhow.)

 _kid,_ you start to say, start to give them one last chance but then someone cries out and the kid's turning away, looking towards a figure.

it's your brother.

it's your fucking baby brother and he looks about ready to spring into action, to fight alongside you, like he'll tear the world apart (or at least, try to talk it down and maybe make it spaghetti) for trying to hurt you but then the kid - _Frisk -_ holds up a hand to him, _wait_ , he cries. like it's not safe.

like you're not safe.

Papyrus pauses, looks between you.

you're not fucking safe, you realise. you're about as far from safe as you can be.

 _Pap,_  you whimper and you can't do this in front of him. you can't. you never will.

the blasters flicker out of existence.

he's running now, placing himself in between you and the kid and he looks so _hurt_ ,  so fucking betrayed and _you_ did that. you put that expression on your baby brother's face.

you and your fucking fucking up all the fucking time.

 _i'm sorry,_ you say. _i have to do this._

you want him to understand but he never will. not until you fix this.

 _Sans,_ your brother says and he sounds about a thousand times more heartbroken than you so you don't let him go on.

 _i've got to get him back,_ you say, _i **need** him back_ and you've never done this in front of Pap before - or anyone really - but if you stay here with him another second you'll never leave.

 _i'm sorry,_ you whisper, as you blink out of existence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im guessing you guys all know about the goner kid, but if you don't look them up they're ~ creepy ~


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bit of a breather chapter tonight
> 
> and i know i say this pretty much every update but you guys are awesome <3
> 
> also i might have slipped up and written frisk as he/him/his so if you catch that anywhere please let me know!

Undyne gets to them just in time to see Sans vanish.

"What the _hell_?"

Papyrus is staring at the spot his brother had been standing, hand still a little outstretched and Undyne would like nothing more than to kick Sans' butt for making Papyrus look so hopeless but right now, Pap's not her main concern.

Frisk - the little shit - is there too, standing in the snow, stick in hand. Their eyes are wet and they're shivering and _God,_ Toriel is going to be _so mad_ she'll probably fry Undyne up with a couple of chips. She drops to her knees in front of the them, "Hey, look at me. You okay, Frisk? You hurt?"

They shake their head but Undyne checks them over anyway and when she's satisfied Frisk's at least _physically_ okay she pulls them into a brief, rough hug, "I told you to stay put, pipsqueak. Your mom is going to _kill_ me."

"'M sorry," Frisk says, little voice muffled against Undyne's shoulder and god, the kid's crying now. Quietly but enough that their little body is shaking.

"Awh, don't do that," Undyne says, pulling back a little. She keeps a grip on Frisk's shoulders, makes sure they're focused on her. "It was probably my fault too. I shoulda known you would have followed us anyway. Nothing stops you, right?"

They smile, falteringly.

"How'd you get here before us anyway, huh, pipsqueak?"

Frisk points back towards the forest, towards the ruins.

"Oh, where you first fell?"  Frisk nods and Undyne grins, "Brought back memories, I bet."

Frisk looks sad again so Undyne gives them a gentle punch on the arm and straightens up, turning to her next disaster. Papyrus is still standing, staring at the spot his brother vanished.

"I - I don't understand," he says quietly. He's frowning now, "He said - He was - " he turns to face Undyne and Frisk. "He was trying to fight you."

"Wait, what?" Undyne snaps, looking back down at Frisk. "He tried to fight you?"

Frisk looks like they might cry all over again but they nod, shakily.

"Did he hurt you?" Undyne demands because if he did -

Frisk shakes their head so hard Undyne reaches down instinctively to still them.

"He must have had a reason," Papyrus is saying. He looks conflicted, like he can't quite decide if he's meant to be attacking Frisk or not. "He wouldn't just - Human! I _demand_ that you tell me why - "

"Hey," Undyne cuts him off, "Lay off the kid, alright? Can't you see they're as freaked as we are?"

Papyrus deflates, "I'm sorry, Frisk." He says quietly.

Frisk nudges Undyne out of the way and wraps their little arms around Papyrus' legs. After a few moments, Papyrus melts into it, bending so that he can hug Frisk properly.

This is when Alphys finally catches up to them, huffing and puffing.

"I told you you should exercise more," Undyne remarks fondly.

Alphys waves her off, leaning heavily against the skeletons's house to catch her breath, "Wh - What happened?" she pants.

Undyne shrugs, "I have no idea. Sans was there when I got here, then he just vanished."

Alphys nods, like that's something that happens in everyday life, "Yeah, he does that. He can do that." Undyne looks at her and she reddens, "I - uh - caught it on my cameras a few times."

"He said he was trying to get someone back," Papyrus says glumly.

Undyne frowns, "You know anything about that, pipsqueak?"

Frisk gently unwinds their arms from Papyrus and nods heavily, "I'll show you." They say.

Frisk leads them round to the back of the skelebro's house to a door Undyne's never noticed before. They pull out a key and, after taking a breath, ease it into the lock and turn it experimentally. The lock clicks and the door swings open. Frisk breathes a sigh of what Undyne assumes is relief.

The room it opens out into has a tiled floor and pale blue walls. It smells faintly like Alphy's lab and it's about as clean, the work space the spans one wall is covered in blueprints and scrawled documents, a few have even made it to the floor, spread out in a huge arc. In one corner there's a machine half covered by a sheet. Most of the blueprints are written in strings of strange symbols that make no sense to her.

"Whoa," Undyne breathes, taking a few steps inside. "Papyrus, you know about this?"

"No," Papyrus says faintly, from the doorway. "No, I had no idea."

Undyne turns back to him and puts a hand on his bony shoulder. He's gazing around at the workshop, looking about as overwhelmed as Undyne feels. Undyne's been there, sort of. Alphys hid an entire lab from her too, an entire chapter of her life but then again, she hadn't been living with Alphy then, hadn't seen her every day.

Sans must have been hiding this from Papyrus well.

Alphys starts pawing through the documents, muttering to herself.

"You can read that stuff, Alphy?"

Alphys has one of the blueprints held up, she studies it intently, "Yes, a little. It's written in hands but I can make the basics out. It's uh, not like anything I've ever seen before. It's - It's brilliant. A-and complicated. But _brilliant._ If Sans wrote this then he's - he's a lot more clever then he lets on."

"Yes," Papyrus agrees, "He is. I've always said he's wasting his potential."

Undyne slings an arm around his shoulders, "We'll figure this out, bonehead," she assures him. Then to Alphys, "You understand any of it?"

"W- well, it's mostly physics, the deep stuff. Theoretical. I - I'm more of a biologist, I suppose, or a mechanic," she swallows, looking up at Papyrus. "B-but I can try."

Undyne grins at her, "Yeah, you can. Frisk," she says, looking down at the kid who's staring around forlornly. "You know what any of this stuff is?"

Frisk shakes their head but they cross the room to the workspace and rifle through one of the drawers until they pull something out and hand it to Papyrus. Undyne peers over Pap's shoulder.

It's a photograph, it looks faded but not from age, from something else. It looks like it was taken in Alphys lab, not the one she showed to people, but the one hidden underground. Sans is there, slightly off centre and wearing a lab coat. He looks happy, Undyne thinks. Really happy.

The rest of the people Undyne doesn't recognise - a short monster with a stern expression, looking like he wants nothing more than to be done with this photograph, a taller one, grinning widely, one with disproportionately large head laughing, an older looking version of the kid they met in Waterfall that makes Undyne give a sharp intake of breath.

And in the centre a tall skeleton, beaming happily, one hand on Sans' shoulder.

"Pap, you recognise any of them?"

Papyrus shakes his head, his hands are shaking slightly, "No."

"What about you, Alphy? It looks like it was taken in your lab."

Alphys has to stand on tiptoes to see the photo, "I don't," she says, eventually. "Except..."

"The kid we met in Waterfall," Undyne finishes for her.

Frisk cocks their head.

"When we were on our way here," Undyne explains. "We ran into someone who looked like your friend, like that," she points. "They - he - helped us."

"Did they tell you to forget about them?" Frisk asks.

"You met them?" Undyne asks, "You never mentioned it before."

Frisk shrugs unhelpfully, "They were gone before I thought to..."

Alphys looks intrigued but Papyrus looks like he might faint at any moment.

"I think we should all go upstairs and catch our breath," Undyne suggests. Frisk nods and Papyrus wordlessly leads them out.

"I'll be there in a minute," Alphys calls after them.

\----

Once they're back upstairs, in the living room Papyrus insists on doing everything for them. He starts a fire in the grate and bustles around upstairs collecting blankets and pillows from his and Sans' rooms before disappearing into the kitchen to make them some dinner.

Frisk plants themself firmly on Papyrus' terminally lumpy couch and draws their knees up to their chest and, after sending a very long, very apologetic text to Toriel, Undyne joins them.

"Hey, squirt," she says, nudging them gently. "You okay?"

Frisk shakes their head, "This is all my fault," they say quietly.

 "What? No, it ain't."

"It is," Frisk insists. "If I had just tried harder - "

"Hey," Undyne says firmly. "Sans is an adult, even if he's not acting like one right now and he's making his own choices. It has nothing to do with you, right?"

Frisk looks at her for a very long time before they nod, not very convincingly. Undyne sighs, "Kid, why do I get the feeling that you know way more about this than any of us?"

Frisk looks away too quickly and shrugs.

Undyne switches tactics, "So, Sans is trying to find the people in those pictures, right?" Frisk nods and Undyne continues, thinking of what the grey kid in Waterfall had said to them, "And I'm guessing something really bad happened to them?"

"I don't know," Frisk says softly. "They're nowhere; no one seems to remember them. I've looked _everywhere._ "

Undyne frowns, "You knew about them before all this?" It's not meant to sound as accusatory it ends up being but the kid doesn't know that. The corners of their mouth start to tug downwards and _oh shit_ they look like they might cry again.

"It's..." Frisk tries, taking shaky breaths. "It's _complicated._ "

"Alright, alright," Undyne says. "It's okay, squirt. No one's blaming you, no one's mad."

" _Sans_ is."

"Well, he's not doing so hot right now, okay, Frisk? And it's got nothing to do with you."

Frisk sobs and Undyne sighs, she's really, _really_ not equipped to deal with this emotional stuff. She puts a steadying hand on their shoulder, "Hey, quiet down, okay? We'll get this straightened out in the morning, right? When we're all a little less... emotional."

"So, uh, try to get some rest, okay? I'll wake you when there's food," she says and then leans closer to whisper, "Unless it looks awful, in which case there's some ramen in my pack."

Frisk doesn't bother protesting, in fact they even manage a small smile. With a yawn they lie down, pulling on of Papyrus' blankets up to cover themself. Undyne ruffles their hair, "I'm gonna go check on Alphys. Don't move, okay? I mean it, okay. Or you'll have my abs to answer to!"

She turns back when she gets to the front door, to check on them. Their eyes are closed; their breathing is steady and even. Undyne smiles.

It's almost pitch black outside and Undyne's still not used to it. Snowdin used to be lit up at night, Christmas lights and warm fires but even in the darkness she's certain she catches a flash of yellow beside Papyrus' mailbox.

She pulls out her spear and squints but nothing jumps out and tries to maul her so she figures she safe, for now.

God, she is going to _kill_ Sans when she gets her hands on his bony ass. Screw him for putting them all through this. Screw him for making Pap and Frisk so upset.

Alphys is where they left her, she's taken the sheet off the broken machine and knells before it, a whole mess of blueprints and notes spread out before her, "Fascinating," she's muttering to herself. " _Amazing_."

"The two words you'd use to describe your awesome girlfriend?" Undyne interrupts. Alphys jerks around in surprise, cheeks flushing.

"U-Undyne, I was just - just..."

"Chatting up Sans' sexy science stuff?"

Alphys smiles sheepishly, "W-Well, I suppose I was. It's all so.. _._ I - I don't think Sans did all of this research - there were at least a few others - but what they found is beyond _anything_ I would have...It's all about time, Undyne, their research shows that there's something wrong with the way _time_ works down here!"

"That sounds insane," Undyne remarks, but honestly, after all this she wouldn't be all that surprised.

Alphys is nodding, "That's what I thought! But this data and this machine! I think it's supposed to be used for time travel. It doesn't work, obviously, but it looks like they tried it once! Can you imagine? The ability to go back and change something whenever things didn't turn out your way...And the stuff on space - theoretically they'd be able to teleport from place to place, even open doorways like in Waterfall.

"It'd be amazing, really," she finishes, gazing up at the broken machine. "There's a whole lot of stuff here on the Core as well, schematics and - " she pauses, looking back to Undyne. "H-How are you holding up?"

Undyne shrugs, "I'm doing better than Frisk and Papyrus."

Alphys winces a little at that, "I didn't even ask," she scolds herself with a wince. "How are they?"

"Fine," Undyne says gently. "Frisk's asleep and Pap's cooking. I think he needs a little space to think. Must be rough," she adds, playfully. "Finding out all of a sudden that this person you love has a whole hidden side to them."

Alphys doesn't find it funny, she closes the distance between them and hugs Undyne tight, "I'm sorry," she says.

Undyne hugs her back, "It's not your fault."

"N-no, I know but -  I know this must be hard for you."

"Thanks, Alphy."

When Alphys pulls back she gazes up at Undyne, "So much for a fun adventure, huh? M-maybe we should have stayed at home..."

"Are you kidding? This has all the makings of a great one!" Undyne gives her a comforting smile. She knows deep down there's nowhere Alphys would rather be but yeah, this hasn't exactly been the easy trek they were expecting. "Besides, we couldn't have let Pap do this by himself."

Alphys hums, "H - He'll be okay, right?"

"Papyrus? Yeah. As soon as we get his brother back on the straight and narrow. Now, come on, Pap's making food and my head hurts too much to look at all this sciencey shit anymore."

Alphys looks back at the research, looking conflicted, "Uh..."

Undyne rolls her eyes, "Alright, alright," she bends and presses a kiss to Alphys' cheek, "But don't stay out here too late, okay? I'll make sure to leave some food out for you."

\----

She finds Papyrus still in the kitchen, apparently trying to stare the spaghetti sauce into mixing itself together. She's never seen him like this, not once, not even when he thinks no one's looking. Even when Sans' threw his tantrum back on the surface, smashed his telescope and screamed until he couldn't anymore, Papyrus had been optimistic.

Now, he looks defeated and Undyne has no idea what she's meant to say to him.

"Hey, didja forget how to do again, Pap?" she starts. "You want me to help out? That sauce isn't going to make itself, you know!"

"It's fine," he says, without turning around. "I'll do it." He moves forward slowly, chopping up the tomatoes with big, heavy strokes. Like he's in a trance.

"Pap," she says. He doesn't turn around.

" _Papyrus_."

He drops the knife.

"You gotta talk to me, pal. You can''t keep this shit bottled up, we talked about this."

Papyrus sighs, finally turning to face her, "I just don't understand," he says, voice tight. "Why would Sans do this? Why would he keep this hidden from me? I knew that he was unhappy but... " he looks so _helpless._

"Hey, you know Sans, he must have had a good reason for keeping quiet. Especially from you, Pap."

"Well _, yes_ but... " Papyrus wavers. "Still..."

"We'll figure this out, Pap. We'll find him. Tomorrow. Now, please, let me help me make that sauce so we can _eat._ I promise not to blow your house up."


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the entry i mention in here is one you don't actually get in a normal playthrough but sans gets it because he's sans

"Asgore! Would you please keep up!" Toriel snapped.

Her ex-husband was dawdling by the flowers, stopping every few minutes to smile down at them or chuckle to himself as though there weren't a child in peril somewhere down here.

"Sorry, Tori," Asgore hurried to catch up with her. "I would have thought all the flowers would have died by now no one's around to water them," he explained.

"That may be but don't you think we more pressing matters to attend to?"

Asgore rubbed at his beard bashfully, "Sorry, love."

"Don't you 'love' me," she muttered. "This is _serious._ Frisk is out there, all alone! Who knows what could be happening to them." She reached up and tugged on ears anxiously.

Asgore gently took her hands in his, "Now, now, Tori. I'm sure Frisk is doing fine. They made it when the Underground was full of monsters without our help, didn't they? And they aren't alone, Undyne and Papyrus and Dr Alphys are with them," he said calmly.

Toriel felt sick. She didn't understand how Asgore could be so calm about this! Especially after - She swallowed. She knew _logically_ that Frisk was most likely fine. Their friends wouldn't let anything happen to them, she knew that too but ever since they had returned to the underground she had not been able to shake the feeling that something was _very_ wrong.

She leant forewords, leaning her forehead against Asgore's chest. It easy was to pretend sometimes that nothing had changed between them, easy too to fall back into their old patterns.

But there were days that Toriel could not look at him.

She had known each and every child that had fallen into their world, each and every child who met their end at the hands of her former husband - however reluctantly it may have been. Some of them spent days with her, weeks even. One, the first to fall after Chara stayed a year.

But she had lost them all and it had been Asgore who had taken them from her.

She recoiled from him and he made a barely stifled sound of dismay, " _Tori._ "

Toriel turned away from him, "Let us just find Frisk."

\----

Undyne wakes up in a self-made nest of pillows and blankets, light glaring off the snow piled high outside. It takes her a moment to remember where she is and why. And _when._

(There's a bleary moment where she assumes she's at Pap's for a sleepover, just visiting from Waterfall. The barrier's still up and they're waiting for a human to show up just to have something to _do_ \- )

She yawns and stretches.

Frisk is still sound asleep on the couch, looking very small amongst all the lumps and bumps and extra bedding. More interestingly though, Papyrus is sprawled a little way from her, snoring.

She snaps a quick picture and posts it to Undernet (she's got bets on with several people as to whether Papyrus sleeps at all) before padding into the kitchen to find some coffee. Alphys is nowhere to be seen, which can only mean she spent all night in the lab and will _definitely_ not be functional without some caffeine in her system.

It's kind of nice, she thinks, as she waits for the coffee to brew: all her friends here, bright morning, surprisingly good night's rest. If it weren't for the fact that all sense and the basic laws of physics seem not to work anymore she'd be pretty happy.

She finds Alphys drooling all over a very complicated looking schematic and (after snapping a pic she'll decide whether or not to post later) she wakes her with a kiss and a mug of coffee dumped over her head.

Alphys is cute when she's mad and wet and not awake enough to do more than wail.

Yeah, it's kind of mean but Undyne's having a rough week and she needs some joy in her life and once she's dried off, Alphys sees the funny side. (Though, that's probably from the sleep deprivation.)

They get back upstairs just to hear Papyrus loudly protesting, "No, human, I refuse to believe it!" and Undyne speeds up, just in case sleep has addled Pap's brain enough to have him attacking Frisk for his brother's honour or something but then Papyrus continues, "I, the GREAT PAPYRUS, do not _sleep._ "

Frisk says something back, too quietly for Undyne to hear and Papyrus scoffs.

"I wasn't _sleeping._ I was just - I was just lying down so that Undyne wouldn't feel weak for sleeping!"

Undyne snorts audibly, and kicks open the door.

Papyrus sighs, "At least you didn't kick it off the hinges this time. Now. Would you kindly tell Frisk that I _wasn't_ sleeping, I was merely - "

Undyne waves her hand, "Pssht. Whatever you say, Paps."

Papyrus counts this as a victory (for some reason) and smirks at Frisk who shakes their head despairingly.

"EXCELLENT! Now that we have that sorted we must leave and find my brother! We never should have taken a break, he could be anywhere by now!"

"Exactly," Undyne says, "So we should probably figure out where he is before we go charging off out there, right?"

"Oh," Papyrus says. "Maybe... LEAVE IT TO ME! There's no one who knows my brother better than I! Now...where would he go....?"

"Right, while Pap comes up with his list of ideas, you wanna weigh in, Frisk? Bet you have some ideas." It comes off as accusatory again and Frisk's face falls. Undyne tries not to feel so guilty, Frisk's been keeping something from them for a long time and she's getting kind of impatient.

"I know where he's going," Frisk says, softly. "I think, anyway." They look over at Alphys, "Your lab, Alphys. The hidden one."

Alphys sighs like she knew this was coming but honestly, it wouldn't take a genius to figure it out. Undyne knows Pap could if they had enough time to let him put the pieces together himself but they don't.

"Will he be able to get in, Alphy?" Undyne asks.

Alphys shrugs, "N - Normally, I'd say no. There's a c-code for the elevator and a key too - which he doesn't have - but it's Sans so... I - I don't know. Maybe. Probably if he had enough time."

"He's had enough time," Undyne sighs. Maybe Papyrus was right. They shouldn't have stopped to rest they should have just pressed on... "Any idea what he's after in there?"

Frisk shakes their head, earnestly.

"Alphys?" Undyne prompts.

Alphys sighs, "There's not much left there. Old beds, old fridges... the old DT Extraction machine - but that's useless unless he's got another human soul to - " she looks at Frisk and bites back whatever she was about to say next. "There are a few old samples, though. Tests and data and a lot of my old research but nothing..." she trails off.

Undyne rubs her forehead; it's starting to ache again _already._ "Okay, so we know he's trying to save those people in the photographs, right? So he's maybe trying to reanimate them or something? Is that possible?"

"Raise the _dead_?" Papyrus sounds sceptical. "That's not only impossible but disgusting and I'm certain my brother would want no part in it!"

Undyne keeps forgetting that Sans doesn't tell Papyrus everything. It's kind of sweet in it's own way but at times like this it's really just frustrating.

"Sorry, bro, it's not as impossible as it sounds," Undyne tells him. Papyrus gapes at her but that's something she'll have to deal with later, now they need a plan. She turns back to Alphys, "You did it, Alphy. You think it's possible?"

Alphys shakes her head, "It was different for me. They weren't _dead_ , not properly. They'd just fallen down. They were still comatose. Sans' friends would have turned to dust a long time ago... U- unless he's got them hidden in there somewhere," she adds, going an alarming shade of green.

"MY BROTHER WOULD NEVER - " Papyrus yells, indignantly.

Undyne soothes him with a look, "He's right, Alphys. Sans might be weird but he's not _that_ weird. Or dark. So what would he be doing then?" She wracks her brains, "Ngahhhh. This is why I prefer being the brawn!"

Then Frisk speaks, "I don't think they're dead. I think it's more complicated than that."

Undyne turns to them.

Frisk's head is bowed, their soft dark hair obscuring most of their face, "I think that somehow they got erased. From time. Sans is trying to - " they break off and look up at Alphys, "Alphys, Fl- that flower, you made. The one you injected with determination it could - do you know what it could do?"

Alphys has gone very, very pale and Undyne narrows her eyes, "What flower?" she asks. Alphy's never mentioned a flower to her. She would have if there was one, right? "Why would you put determination into a flower?"

"Uh - Um, I - I," Alphys is flustered, looking between the two of them. "I -  I -  I..."

"Alphys?" Undyne presses.

"I - I - It's a long - It's a long story, Undyne," she hangs her head, like she's ashamed and turns to face Frisk. "N-no, I - I didn't even know it could talk for sure until... I - I thought the experiment had been a failure, you see and I - I just sent it back to Asgore's garden," she seemed to shrink into herself. "I thought I'd just _imagined_ it talking..."

"Wait," Papyrus interrupts. "I know that flower! He's my friend! He's the one who told me to send Frisk to your lab that time!"

"He's not your friend," Frisk says, before Undyne can process any of what's just happened. "Papyrus, he's not a good person - well, he is, or he _was -_ but he's - he's _dangerous._ "

"Dangerous?" Papyrus repeats, frowning deeply. "But he's just a little flower! Though, I suppose you wouldn't lie to me. I trust your judgement, human!"

Frisk looks relieved, "Thank you."

It's the most Undyne's ever heard Frisk speak since - since well, _ever._

"Alright, can someone back up and explain what the heck is happening, please?" Undyne snaps.

"Wh- when I was researching determination," Alphys says, avoiding Undyne's eye. "I realised I-I'd need a vessel to hold it s-since monsters can't handle it. I was going to use o-one of Asgore's flowers, the f-first one that bloomed after... Anyway, I - I thought it didn't work and Asgore seemed attached to it so I sent it back t-to him when I was done. I thought... I thought I heard a voice sometimes a- at night in the lab c-crying but I never...

And then it disappeared f - from the garden. Asgore said it had probably died and that there were always more but I always wondered..."

"The determination made him able to do things," Frisk says quietly. They look down, fidgeting with the fraying hem of their jumper. "You won't believe me."

"Try us," Undyne says gently.

"Y-yeah, Frisk, we- we've been through enough odd things these past few days to believe _anything,_ " she laughs nervously.

"Well, I FOR ONE, will believe anything you tell me, human. You have so far proved to be nothing but a true friend to my brother and I, after all!" Papyrus announces, clapping Frisk on the back a little too enthusiastically.

Frisk bites their lip, "You might hate me."

"I COULD NEVER!" Papyrus booms, pulling Frisk into a tight hug.

"Hate you? You got us out of here, squirt! We could never hate you!" Undyne assures them.

"Frisk, you c-can trust us, whatever you've done... I - I'm sure you did it for the right reasons... T-trust me, it won't be as bad as you think," Alphys says, with a weak smile.

Frisk extracts themself from Papyrus' bone crushing grip and sighs, "Okay..."

\----

you remember the lab when you get to it, each room unfurling in your mind as you wander around in the dark and the dust.

the crappy vending machine that only dispensed joke snacks, the shower that only ran at freezing cold or bone-meltingly hot, the room of tapes. you've poked around in here before, you think, during one or two of Frisk's loops.

you read through Alphys' research on determination, girl knows her stuff. that's the key, the flower said. That's your key to getting Gaster back.

 _monsters' physical forms can't handle"determination" like humans' can_ , Alphys haswritten, with too much determination, our bodies begin to break down...

but you're no ordinary monster. not anymore, anyway.

your phone dings:

**Strongfish91 has posted a photo.**

*looks like justice _does_ sleep*

it's your brother, sprawled out on the floor of your dingy Snowdin house, mouth hanging open as he sleeps and fuck.

fuck. fuck. _fuck._

why couldn't they have just stayed out of this? if they'd just given you more time you could have been finished here. you could have fixed things before anyone else got hurt and they just don't _get it._

you're tired after all that, after fighting - _almost_ fighting Frisk.

what the fuck is wrong with you anyway? you fucking attack the kid that saved you all? all because a flower told you to. all because a flower  put a nasty little thought in your head.

you're so fucking _stupid._

you're stupid and you're tired and you just want to get this done.

you push it all to the back of your mind - Frisk and your brother and everyone else - _they don't get it, they don't_ \- and you get to work.

you need determination.

the flower says there might be some left over.

you've just got to find it.

(and when you finally drop - when you're finally so tired you can't see straight and you stumble onto one of the musty old beds you swear there's someone there, you swear there's someone who tucks you and lets their hand linger on your cheek and _Gaster,_ you mumble, leaning into it and the thing behind you sighs softly, sadly.

 _Oh, Sans,_ you're sure it says.)

when you wake up the flower is staring at you.

 _howdy, pal,_ it says and it might be grinning but it's far from happy.

you yawn, _your plans not turning out as rosy as you thought they would?_

the flower raises an eyebrow, _that was weak even for you._

_yeah, well, guess my material could use pruning. a fresh crop of jokes for the new season._

_always the comedian,_ the flower mocks. _no one's buying your act anymore, so you might as well drop it._

_awh, does that mean i'm not getting paid anymore? i can't afford to lose **another** job._

the flower ignores this, _you found any determination yet? you know, I have an idea about where we can get some._

 _i'm not hurting Frisk,_ you say.

it laughs, _golly! guess i must have hallucinated that fight you had with them, huh?_

your head is pounding. you dig the heels of your hands into your skull.

 _you know,_ the flower whispers, drawing closer. _it's the only way you'll get him back. And, really, if you do it right, Frisk won't care, will they? they won't even know._

 _no,_ you insist.

 _and, i know you believe me about Chara,_ it continues. _you're a smart guy, you know what's what. maybe, if you're careful, you can get the determination you want without hurting Frisk. and really, it won't just be you benefitting. those other monsters had families, had lives._

you must be way further gone than you thought because the flower is starting to make sense.

 _think it over,_ the flower says with a wink. _oh, and get a move on. the king and queen have arrived and they are **not** happy._

\----

"You're right," Undyne says, when Frisk finally falls silent. "I don't believe you."

"It _is_ a little much to swallow," Papyrus agrees, looking down at his feet.

Frisk shakes their head, eyes wet, "I _knew_ you wouldn't - " they begin but Alphys interrupts, "A-actually, Undyne, S-Sans' research backs up a lot of what he's saying..."

"Come _on,_ Alphy? Saves? Resets? That's a little much, don't you think!?"

"N-not if you think about it: Frisk has determination, all humans do and i-if they were to d-die their soul might l-linger. Determination is p-powerful and I - I think it would make sense if it could go back - change things."

"But why wouldn't any of the other humans have it then?" Undyne asks. "Six of them came through before Frisk and none of them could do what Frisk says they can."

"Could," Frisk corrects. "I don't think I can do it anymore..."

"I - I," Alphys shakes her head. "I don't know... M-maybe they just weren't as determined? Determination did seem to vary between the souls..."

"Flowey can do it to," Frisk says. "Before I got here, anyway."

"So, maybe Frisk can only do it because he's more determined than - than the flower," Alphys suggests.

Undyne nods, it makes sense she guesses. In some messed up sort of way. "So, you're saying that with determination you could go back in time, over and over again, to get what you wanted?"

Frisk nods.

Undyne feels a little sick. How long had Frisk spent doing that? Experimenting with their lives? Changing little things here and there, until they were happy? She looks at Alphys who looks just as troubled as her and then at Papyrus who just looks confused, then at Frisk who's watching her with wide eyes.

"Are you mad?" They ask.

"I - It's just a lot to process. Is - Does the research back that up, Alphy?"

Alphys nods, "There's a lot about time here. Timelines jumping back and forth, stopping and starting - they have notes on little slips here and - I - I don't really know h-how they came to this conclusion but it suggests everything just ends."

Frisk makes a frightened little sound, "Th- that's what Sans said when I - " they cut themselves off, clamping a little hand across their mouth.

"When you?" Undyne prompts.

Frisk shakes their head vigorously, " _Never mind._ "

 _Baby steps,_ Undyne thinks.

"Everything ending doesn't have to be a bad thing, right," she says. "It could just mean you losing your power."

Frisk considers this for a minute, looks to Alphys who nods and looks just a bit calmer.

"Okay," Undyne says. "Frisk is a time travelling busybody but everything turned out okay in the end so now I guess we can - " _start figuring out what Sans is up to,_ she's going to say but Papyrus, uncharacteristically, interrupts her.

"But I don't understand," he says, looking down at Frisk with an anguished expression on his face. "Wasn't it difficult? Going back again and again and again? Knowing we would forget you each time?"

Frisk nods.

"So why would you keep doing it? Why wouldn't you just finish the first time you freed us?"

"I - I wanted everyone to be happy," Frisk mumbles. "And no matter what I did, no matter what choices I made there were some people I couldn't make happy..."

"My brother," Papyrus says quietly.

Frisk nods, looking up at Papyrus with teary eyes, "I tried! I tried so hard over and over but I couldn't..."

Papyrus bends down to hug them, gentler this time.

"I'm sorry," Frisk mumbles. Papyrus holds them until they've stopped crying. "I- It's not just him though, there's someone else I couldn't save." They curl their hands into little fists, "No matter what I did, I couldn't save everyone."

There's silence then as the weight of Frisk's words begin to sink in. They're just a kid, they shouldn't have to have the wellbeing of an _entire race_ to worry about. God, Undyne would have thrown in the towel after round one, probably. Gotten her and Alphy their happy ending, Papyrus too maybe but she can't imagine going that far for many other monsters.

She should say something, she knows. Something to make Frisk understand what a strong person they are, to make them know how much Undyne admires them, how they're _anything_ but a failure. But the words don't come and then Alphys is breaking the silence anyway.

"S-so, Sans is going to try and use determination to Reset and save those people," she says, quietly horrified.

"He _can't,"_ Papyrus wails, "It'll kill him!"

"He'll have to find some first," Undyne points out. "It's not all that easy to come by, right, Alphy?"

"A-actually, there might be some left over at the lab..."

Undyne groans, "We better get over there before he kills himself, then."

Papyrus moans out loud at that suggestion and Undyne shoots him an apologetic look. But at least they won't have to worry about the idiot actually _succeeding_.

"He might not die," Frisk says.

Papyrus looks overjoyed.

"Nope," Undyne says, standing up to gather her things. "If he shoots up with determination, he'll definitely die. Back me up, Alphys."

"Sh- She's right, Frisk," Undyne says sadly. "Monsters just aren't built for it."

" _Some_ monsters can handle it though," Frisk insists, they look up at Undyne. " _You_ have determination."

Undyne snorts, "That's ridiculous, squirt. I'm stronger than pretty much everyone else but I'm not _determined._ "

"You are though. I know you are. You - " they clam up again and Undyne sighs.

"Alright, so we not only have to worry about Sans hurting himself but we have to worry about him messing with time. Wait, do we have to worry about that? Will we even know?"

Frisk shakes his head.

"Guess we better get moving then," Undyne says.

\----

**[ 1 New Voice Mail - Fish Face ]**

_Fuck you, Sans. Seriously. I can't believe you're putting your brother through this. And Frisk. Do you have any idea how much they look up to you? You're breaking their fucking heart all for some people no one even remembers? I honestly don't know if I even wanna save you anymore, not for your sake anyway. But if we get to that lab and you're dead I'll find a way to resurrect you just to kill you all over again, I swear._

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah, i always assumed the dude who tucks you in is gaster especially when coupled with the creepy "shape of a man" thing you get in the fridge room 
> 
> also, this fic is assuming that chara's soul is sort of just bopping about in the ruins waiting for someone to call her forth and give her life again ~ hellooooo frisk


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so ive actually somewhat changed the endgame for this fic and that means im gonna be making a few small edits to earlier chapters nothing that'll force you guys to reread though so don't worry! if there is anything i've changed i'll mention it in the notes - it'll mostly just be really small details though.
> 
> i need to edit anyway, since i keep referring to frisk as "he" which i guess means subconsciously i think they're a boy? i might change them to male, we'll see.
> 
> so initially, i was hoping to have this finished by christmas but with this new stuff it's not looking like that'll happen so strap in for a long(er) ride dear readers and please dont be mad that this chapter is mostly bridging stuff, next chapter the real stuff begins!

**[One New Voice Mail - Alphys]**

_H-h-hi Sans, it's uh, Alphys but you already knew that because you have caller ID.... I - I know you haven't c-called anyone back yet but I - I hope you at least listen to this...Even if it's nothing you haven't heard before.... Sorry, I'm bad at this b-but I think I owe it to you - a-and to me - to try._

_Undyne left you a message a little while ago - a-at least I think it was you. I-I don't know if there's anyone else she's angry at right now b-but I wanted you to know she doesn't mean it. She's mad, y-yeah, but mostly she's just worried, we all are._

_A-and we know what you're doing - a-at least, we think we do and I wanted to tell you not to. I-I wanted to tell you th-that determination will b-burn right through you. Y-you'll melt, Sans, and there won't even be dust for us to find.  B-but you know all that, already, right? I-I've read your research and you're sm-smart if there's anyone who'd u-understand it'd be you and I left all my research there. I bet you found it by now._

_A-and you know we all care about you?_

_Wh-what I really wanted to say though, was that I - I don't think it'll work. E - Even if you manage to h-handle the determination, I don't think you'd be able to go back that far. Fr-From what Frisk said they couldn't go back to before their determination became - became **powerful.**_

_And, Sans, I - I've read your - I already said that, didn't I? Oh, god, I suck at this..._

_I - I think I know how we can make the machine work. I - I think we c-can save your friends b-but it'll be hard and... L - Listen, y - you'll have to hang on until we get there, o - okay? Th-then we can do this together._

_P - please, Sans. D - don't do anything stupid._

_I - I've been speaking too long, I'm sorry._

_I guess I - I'll see you soon?_

**[Message Deleted]**

\----

"So," Undyne begins, conversationally. They're back in Waterfall, taking a break beside her piano puzzle (she's still so damn proud of herself for that one.) She'd spent days coming up with the idea and weeks trying to convince Alphys to help her set the mechanics of it off.

When she'd been a kid she'd spent ages with that statue, bringing it an umbrella, sitting at it's base listening to it's pretty tune. The umbrella would always be gone the next time she came past though. She'd staked out the area once to find out who was taking them and of course, it was that wriggly annoying dog that sprang out of the darkness to snatch the poor statue's umbrella.

It's weird to be back after so much time away, listening to the distance music.

"These Resets, they only happen when you want them too?"

Frisk is eating a miraculously not rotten Crab Apple and they shake their head almost immediately, "Not always."

They've been talking a lot since their big confession. It's taken some getting used to (not that Undyne isn't _thrilled_ the little mouse she's gotten to know is finally opening up but come on, it's a little unsettling.) Plus it's taxing the kid's voice, she knows. They're getting a little raspy.

Maybe it's just that know Frisk's talking she's realising how damn quiet they usually are.

"It happened when I died too."

Undyne can tell straight away that Frisk didn't mean to say that. They stop chewing, swallow slowly and shake their heads, "I - I didn't mean to - "

Undyne lets herself slide down the wall she'd been leaning on, sitting down beside the kid as the weight of those words hit her. "Wait, you actually _died._ "

Frisk, who has taken another bite, nods.

"Whoa," Undyne breathes. Time travel is one thing, dying over and over again is another. Frisk obviously finds her stunned silence unsettling because they say (through a mouthful of apple,) "I don't think anyone meant it. S-sometimes I just wasn't quick enough dodging and..."

Undyne thinks back to their fight. How Frisk seemed to know the pattern her spears would come in, how they seemed to already know when they could make their escape.

"Did I ever - " Undyne can't bring herself to say it. Not now. Back then, before Frisk, killing (or at least badly injuring) humans was just part of the job. Packaging them up for Asgore to steal their soul, just another step towards freedom.

Frisk doesn't say anything and Undyne has her answer.

"Whoa."

"It took me a while to realise I could run away," Frisk says quietly, with a weak half-smile.

Undyne recognises it for what it is, it's an attempt to make light of the situation and who is she to deny the kid that? "You mean you actually _stood your ground_? I don't believe that for a second, punk!"

Frisk giggles and from across the chamber Papyrus booms, "WHAT? Undyne! Are you suggest my friend is uncourageous? He fought and beat Asgore, I'll have you know!"

"Kind of," Frisk whispers.

"So did I!" Undyne calls back.

"Oh," Papyrus says. "Well, yes. Perhaps you are equally brave." And he falls silent to consider this.

Undyne looks at Frisk. Frisk pre-empts her question, shaking their head, "He always stopped before it got to that. I woke up in his shed a lot."

Undyne shudders, "A fate worse than death," she whispers.

Frisk laughs again, "After the first time he put in better food!"

"Oh, in that case!" There's silence then and Undyne looks at Frisk for a long time. There's something else she wants to ask, something she's been curious about for a while. Frisk looks unhappy when they think no one else is looking. Maybe not _unhappy_ but troubled, at least. Alphys looked like that once. Sans didn't but Undyne supposes hiding your feelings is pretty easy if your face is stuck in a permanent grin.

She's always wondered about that. It's the Resetting she knows now, thinks now. But there's something more, something Frisk's still not telling them. It's important, Undyne knows. She hopes Frisk opens up about it before it's too late but some prompting can't hurt, right?

"Hey, Frisk," she nudges their shoulder. "You ever fight back? In all those go arounds?"

Frisk goes very quiet and shrinks into themselves.

Undyne waits patiently.

On the other side of the chamber, Papyrus quizzes Alphys about Mettaton's private life.

Eventually, Frisk nods, almost imperceptibly.

"You know I don't think any less of you, right?" Undyne says, quietly.

"You would," Frisk whispers. "You would if you knew."

\----

when you pop back to Snowdin you're relived to find it empty.

they've gone after you, you know. you're not deluded enough to think they'd give up. good thing you've know so many shortcuts.

you have to take the machine apart to move it.

it takes you almost a whole day. they'll be halfway to hotland by now.

that's okay, it'll only take you a little while to put it back together again. you've done it enough times. obsessively, over and over until your hands are stiff and aching and overworked, looking for that _one thing_ it's missing.

and now you know it's so obvious, you can't believe you missed it before. or maybe you didn't. maybe you found out over and over and forgot.

maybe that's why you wrecked the damn thing in the first place.

and that's one thing you do remember, that first time you slipped up so bad Pap caught you. that first time you sat at Grillby's from morning to night, knocking 'em back until he refused to serve you and then begging drinks off other monsters 'til he kicked  you out.

you stumbled home and it hurt so fucking _bad_ so you took a wrench to your machine, screamed until your voice broke and crawled back upstairs to do _something_ and of course Paps caught you.

his face dropped and you've never felt so _small._

he'll understand soon though.

\----

Frisk couldn't sleep.

They had been forced to stop when Alphys almost slipped off a walkway because of how tired she was. She'd brought a lot of Sans' research with her, insisting that she could read and walk at the same time. Undyne had offered to carry her and had made only a few rooms before her legs started to tremble. She hadn't wanted to take a rest, none of them had, but they would be no good to Sans half-dead with exhaustion.

They were hunkered down in Gerson's old place, the cavern ceiling alight with glittering gems. It was almost like sleeping out under the stars. Almost.

Waterfall always smelt musty, thick and damp, it was something Frisk had never noticed before but now it was inescapable. Maybe they'd just gotten used to it, the way they'd gotten used to the lack of sun on their face or breeze in their hair.

They couldn't imagine spending their whole life down here. Not anymore.

They rolled over.

Undyne and Alphys were curled up together on one side of them, Undyne snoring loudly and arguing with someone in her sleep about who was stronger. Papyrus was on Frisk's other side, he'd fallen asleep again, leant up against the wall on "guard duty."

He looked exhausted and there was a tiny part of Frisk that was starting to hate Sans for making his brother feel like that. But that part was drowned out by the constant knowledge that this was Frisk's fault. Frisk's meddling. Frisk's failures.

Flowey's before that, they supposed, but Flowey didn't know any better. Frisk did.

 _Speak of the devil,_ Frisk thought, as he caught a brief glimpse of yellow through the chamber entrance. He was probably just there to spy but Frisk got up anyway. They paused for a moment, eyeing the stick that hung out of their rucksack but Flowey wouldn't hurt them. Not badly.

That was the only thing Frisk knew for sure.

Flowey cackled when Frisk approached him, voice echoing off the cavern walls and reverberating until there was nothing but that hideous sound.

"Shouldn't you be asleep, Frisk?" His face flickered into a parody of Toriel's, "Growing children need their rest, how else will you grow up _big and strong_?"

"What did you tell Sans?" Frisk kept their voice low.

Flowey sniggered, "Come on, Frisk. It's no fun if I _tell_ you! That'd ruin the surprise! Besides, I'm sure you can figure it out. There are only a few things it could be. Think about it: what gave us our powers?"

Frisk crossed their arms, "Determination."

"Ding! Ding! Ding! Golly, you're on fire today!"

"That doesn't make sense, determination would kill him. How does that benefit you?"

Flowey laughed, "Why does it need to _benefit_ me? I'm having enough fun watch you three bumble about trying to save him!"

Frisk shook his head, "No. You wouldn't do this if it didn't help you in some way."

"Help me do what, Frisk?" Flowey shook his head. "There's nothing in this world I want anymore. Nothing I can _have_ at any rate."

"Chara," Frisk said simply. "You want your best friend back."

For a moment, Flowey's smile flickered into something dark and menacing. Then it was all smiles again, "Boy, Frisk, I think someone's got an unhealthy obsession with the dead."

"She's not dead," Frisk said before they could catch themselves. "I mean... Her soul. It's still here, isn't it?"

He leant in close, "I don't know, Frisk. Is it?" He smirked.

Frisk's hand closed around the locket they wore instinctively, the cool metal pulsing dully against their palm.

"Well, I've got to go! There are some people who arrived yesterday deserving of a _royal_ welcome and I can't leave them waiting around for it!"

 _Toriel,_ Frisk thought, they should have known she would come for them. It made them feel all warm inside. Frisk looked at Flowey, he was smirking, he wanted Frisk to take the bait, to beg for their new parent's lives but all at once Frisk realised, Flowey wouldn't hurt them.

Maybe Asgore. Frisk had watched Flowey kill Asgore over and over again but they'd never seen him hurt Toriel. They'd even been scolded by him the one time they only killed her. If Toriel was with Asgore, Flowey wouldn't hurt him either.

Frisk rocked back on their heels.

Flowey, obviously annoyed that things weren't going his way, arched a brow, "What? Nothing to say? You're just going to let me have my fun with them?"

Frisk stayed silent.

"Some hero you are!" Flowey continued. "Won't even stand up for Mommy and Daddy!"

Flowey scoffed, "I don't _have_ parents," then he giggled. "The closest I have is Alphys, I suppose. She keeps doing that, doesn't she? Creating horrible things that end up hating her!"

Frisk ignored that, "When you could Reset," they asked. "Did you kill them? Your parents, I mean?"

That question seemed to stump him. For a moment he looked bewildered and for that moment, Frisk was _sure_ they could Asriel still in there. Then the demonic grin was back, "Of _course_ I did! Wouldn't you? Just once? To see what it felt like? Of course, I didn't do it _just once_. And don't say you'd never do something like that, I know what you've been up to!"

Frisk tugged at their sleeve, a little uncomfortably. Flowey didn't miss a beat. He sidled closer, grin spreading until it threatened to split his face in two.

"Do you remember your parents, Frisk?" He whispered. "Do you even have any? Was there a Frisk before they fell into the Underground? Did you exist?"

It was a good question and it was one Frisk was not ready to answer yet. Instead, they shifted backwards, keeping their expression neutral, "How did it feel when you killed them?"

Flowey stared, then abruptly, he began to laugh. He laughed until he had doubled over, stem bent so that his face was inches from the ground. "You're a strange child, you know that, Frisk? " Flowey said, when he'd caught his breath. Then he giggled again, "You know, it didn't make me feel _anything._ It made me feel e m p t y! Even emptier than before! But, _boy_ , was it fun!

"Now," he said, still trembling with little giggles. "I've - "

"Was Toriel happy when she knew who you were?" Frisk interrupted.

"Golly, Frisk. You're in an inquisitive mood tonight, aren't you? But as I was saying before you so rudely interrupted me, I've got to get going! I'll see you around, Frisk!"

\----

Undyne wakes up when Frisk leaves.

She's not too worried, the squirt probably just needs a bathroom break or something, which is something Undyne still doesn't really get. Alphys had tried to explain the intricacies of human anatomy to her, with diagrams and everything but it had been so _gross_ that they hadn't got far with it. Humans are fascinating though, she grasped that much.

Fascinating but inefficient.

Then she hears voices; Frisk and someone she's not met. It sets her teeth on edge and she can't hear everything clearly but the fact that Frisk is talking to _anyone_ out there _alone_ and _in secret_ doesn't feel right.

And godammit, she trusts Frisk. She trusts them so much it's kind of frightening. There's a reason they're keeping this secret - even if it's not a good one - and she's fairly sure Frisk'll tell them everything when they're ready.

Just to be sure, she keeps a close eye on them when they set off again. Frisk is quiet again and so is Alphys, nose buried in another of Sans' haphazard journals. Even Pap's mostly quiet, only speaking occasionally to point things out or wonder aloud about how Mettaton's world tour is going.

Undyne just wants to get where they're going, they're a few hours from Hotland yet.

"Alphys?" she hears from behind her.

She hears the rustle and snap of a journal being closed, "Yes, Frisk?"

"Mettaton has a soul, right?"

"O-of course he does." Alphys sounds stumped. "Wh-why would you ask?"

"But he's a robot," Frisk goes on, "So he didn't have one when you started building him?"

Silence. Alphys must have shaken her head because Frisk asks, "So, where did you get one for him? Did you make it?"

Alphys keeps the method she used to create Mettaton a secret, she wouldn't even share it with _Undyne._ (To be fair though, that was probably more to do with Undyne's dismissal of the whole thing as dorky nonsense than to secrecy.)

"I - I... No, I didn't make it. You - You can't make a soul, Frisk."

"So how - "

"I had to find a soul who - who was willing."

"But they're still them? The soul?"

"Y-yeah."

Frisk sounds troubled, "So there's no way to make a soul?" their voice is small and tight.

Alphys makes a distressed noise and Undyne decides this conversation has probably gone on long enough. She turns, giving them the boldest smile she can manage, "I think we should stick to one adventure at a time, don't you?"

Alphys nods gratefully and Frisk after a beat, Frisk nods too.

 _Man, Frisk,_ Undyne thinks. _You have gotten yourself into some deep stuff somewhere._

She just hopes the kid trusts them enough to let them help out.

\----

**[One New Voice Mail - Alphys]**

_I - I  - I know what you're doing._

_I'm so st-stupid. I should have known you'd know the determination would only c-carry you so far b- but you're still in danger. S-sans I-I'm not going to baby you, y-you know exactly wh - what could happen if you succeed - or if you fail. S-so I just want to say I - I hope I'm wrong and th-that you think about your brother before you do this._

**[Message Deleted]**

\----

you don't turn around the next time the flower pops by to say hi. you let him wait, let him grow impatient.

you've caught up on Alphys' lab notes now, you know her little secret. deep down you always knew there was something off about that plant.

you keep working until the flower clears his throat.

keep working until it speaks.

keep working until it pops up right in front of you (and man, you can use shortcuts but not like _that_.)

 _sorry, your majesty,_ you say, wiping the sweat off your skull. _didn't see ya there._

the flower doesn't bat an eye, _so you worked it out? gosh, sans, that only took you what? three lifetimes? four? how long have you been stuck in this loop before? it must be terribly boring._

 _buddy, you're telling me. so i gotta know,_ you say. _what you getting out of all this?_

the flower (or should that be the prince?) snorts, _does it matter? nothing i say now is going to change your mind, is it?_

_true._

the flower looks thoughtful for a moment, cocks it's head (or tilts it's stem a little one way) like it's trying to decide whether you're worth sharing with. _maybe im tired,_ it says finally. _maybe I just want something new to happen. maybe I just want out._

 _you and me both,_ you think and of the two options you're not sure which you're aiming for anymore. either way, you'll end up happy. _you wanna get outta my way so i can get on with it, then?_

the flower obliges, shimmers out of existence and appears at your elbow instead.

 _is he worth tearing the whole world apart for?_ the flower sounds curious now, like it genuinely wants to know, there's no layers to its question, only honesty.

you lean back into the machine, _guess we'll find out._

_your friends are coming to stop you, you know._

you know.

 _i could slow them down, if you like,_ it sing-songs.

_no thanks._

**_fine._ ** _but you better. or i'll do it myself._

it must leave because you don't hear anything after that.

it's funny, all this time you've felt like you were breaking down, coming apart at the seams, like you were going explode and collapse into yourself and flicker out of existence all at once, like everything was building up and up and up and you couldn't think straight, all there was was that whole in your heart and that name in head and the bone-aching exhaustion of living the same thing over and over and over and over and over and -

and now you're thinking clearly and you're calm, you're wonderfully, _terribly_ calm.

you're going to get him back.

or you're going to fail and nothing will matter anyway.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the fallen child's appearence is based on [ this awesome piece ](http://megaepiphany.tumblr.com/post/132715415149/the-lost-humans-presumably-children-are-tbh-some) by [ megaepiphany ](http://megaepiphany.tumblr.com/) over on tumblr
> 
> as always you guys are awesome 
> 
> things happen this time, i promise

The first child fell before Toriel had left the palace.

She came so soon after Chara that no one had been prepared, a small girl with long red hair tied back by a ribbon and a toy knife clutched loosely in her hand. Toriel hadn't thought Asgore would kill her, not truly.

She had known he would try, even though she had spent so long trying to talk him out of it, but she had thought he wouldn't be able to go through with it. The girl was just a child after all and her knife was plastic. She had killed some monsters, Toriel heard later, but they had attacked her first and without anyone to guide her how would she have known what to do?

She had left as soon as Asgore had struck his final blow, the child's soul rising out of her lifeless body a pretty light blue colour.

And there had been something in the child's eyes and gait and manner that reminded Toriel so strongly of her own daughter that she had not been able to take it.

She had left with her child - with what remained of her child and even knowing that humans could kill, that humans had taken both of her children from her couldn't make her hate them.

Asgore didn't either, she knew that now. He hadn't wanted to kill those children anymore than he wanted to hurt anybody but he still had. There was nothing that could change that.

He was sorry for everything, she knew that better than everyone. He had planted little memorial gardens for each of them, each stolen child and when they as a people had been questioned about the disappearances he had come so close to confessing.

It had been Undyne that talked him out of it, Undyne and Alphys and even Toriel herself had weighed in because as much as she wanted justice for those children she knew what such accusations would bring. They would not be able to win a war against the humans and this time, she was certain they wouldn't be locked away in a mountain at the end of it.

He was somewhat _less_ now, she had noticed. Quieter, more reserved and bumbling than he had been before.

She had never been able to understand why Frisk was so forgiving of Asgore for while Frisk didn't call Asgore "father", not even in little, quiet moments, she knew that was how her child thought of him.

And she knew those feelings were reciprocated - even if Asgore still kept his distance.

But now, seeing him so calm about things, seeing him stop to marvel at flowers or collect little oddities that had been left behind, it was easy to believe that he didn't have much love for Frisk. It was easy to believe he was only here as a show of duty for Toriel, that he no more saw Frisk as his child than he saw any of those slaughtered souls as children.

It was easy to hate him, to put all her negative thoughts into cursing him than to worrying but this, this new game he was playing was beginning to wear her patience thin.

"No, no, Tori," he insisted, once again turning back up the path to the core. "I'm certain I heard someone calling."

"Asgore, for goodness sake!" Toriel called after him. "We searched the core thoroughly, there was no one there!"

"The core changes all the time! I'll just be a moment, I promise."

She could leave him. He was a boss monster, stronger even than her, he would be fine. She would find Frisk and the others while Asgore bumbled about in the core chasing ghosts but there was something unsettling here and the longer she spent here the more convinced she grew that she was being watched.

" _Asgore_!" she tried once more but he waved her off, turning to give her a rushed _you go on_ sign. She sighed and looked longingly down the path towards Hotland before, begrudgingly; she stomped after the monster king.

And then, so distantly, so softly she would have believed it to be in her imagination were it not for Asgore's insistence, she heard it. The sound of a child crying from somewhere within the core.

 _Frisk,_ she thought at first but she knew her child's cry inside and out and it was not Frisk that cried out. 

It was another familiar cry.

\----

When they make it to the lab, Undyne realises that she never wanted to actually get there. It had been easy to imagine a plan of action when they were in Snowdin or Waterfall, when it was still faraway and in the future and not right in front of her.

Not right here, right now.

The building rises up out of the smog of Hotland and she's always found it kind of intimidating, even when it was just Alphys' house to her but now? Now she has no idea what they're going to find in there.

The bravado is quickly fading into dread and it's not just her. Papyrus is standing beside her, brow furrowed, hands clenching and unclenching at sides. Every now and again he opens his mouth, like he's about to announce that he'll be the first one in or something but he never does.

They stand in silence, waiting for Frisk and Alphys to catch up with them and hopefully break the silence.

Undyne should say something comforting or do something to lessen the tension but she doesn't want to lie to Papyrus. This is going to get ugly, fast.

"Let's just get this over with," she grumbles, when Frisk and Alphys reach them. Frisk looks pale, Alphys is trembling.

It takes Alphys all of ten minutes to disable the electric force fields Sans has activated around the lab, she invented them after all but for whatever reason he's left the front door unlocked.

Undyne raises her spear just in case as they go in. The main room of Alphys's lab looks unchanged - it's a little dustier, and there's less clutter but it looks no different than it did when they left. Alphys left almost everything behind when they moved to the surface, she'd only taken her DVDs and anime figures. And that super convenient-to-draw bed she had.

"O-oh no," she mutters. "H-he must be downstairs."

Papyrus frowns, looking around the place (obviously in search of a staircase), "There's a downstairs?! It must be well concealed!"

Alphys winces, "Y-yes, it's wh-where I did all my r-real work." She crosses to the hidden elevator and removes one of the wall tiles to reveal a control panel. She sighs after tapping in a few codes, "H-he's locked me out. I - I knew he would but - "

"You can get in though, right?"

"I - It might take me a while," Alphys says, head bowed low in defeat. "I - I built the system specifically to keep unwanted people out..."

"How long is _a while_?" Papyrus demands, hands on his hips.

"An hour, maybe," Alphys says, with a glance at the unresponsive control panel. "I - It depends on what he's done."

Papyrus is struggling to stay calm, "But Sans is - " he snap. She's never known him to snap - not at anyone that isn't his brother and even then it's always fond. Even when she began his training and treated him awfully he'd never snapped at her, he'd always been patient, always been calm.

"Just let us know what you want us to do," Undyne interrupts, a firm hand on Papyrus' shoulder.

He sags slightly under her touch, letting his despair show for a few seconds before snapping back up to attention, "YES. Tell us what you need, Alphys and we shall have the elevator working again in no time!"

\----

 _they're heeeeeerrrrreeee,_ the flower sings.

 _you don't say,_ you drawl.

it doesn't matter.

the machines ready.

\----

But there's only so much they can do. There's only so much heavy lifting, only so much _hold this, please_ and _hand me that_. Mostly it's Alphys hunched over a computer frowning and muttering to herself under her breath. Occasionally, she asks Papyrus for password suggestions which are surprisingly almost always right. He's taken to sitting as close to her as she'll allow (Alphy likes space when she's working) and peering over her shoulder.

Undyne has backed off and is sitting against the opposite wall, polishing her spear.

Frisk crosses the room to sit beside her, drawing their knees up to their chest.

"You doing okay there, punk?" she asks, when it becomes apparent Frisk isn't going to speak first.

They keep pressing their hands to their mouth, subconsciously, like they're desperately trying to keep something in. "What are you going to do when you get down there?"

Undyne leans back, spinning her spear lazily in one hand, "Well, that depends on what we find."

Frisk nods, then, "Will you fight him?"

Undyne looks at them, "Only if I have to. Hopefully, I won't."

She's expecting Frisk to ask her not to hurt Sans too bad - which she won't, no matter how much she wants to pound him for all this shit - but instead Frisk looks away, down at their knees, "He's tough," they say softly.

Undyne's never seen Sans fight, as far as she knew he didn't much. She'd always assumed he'd use a slightly trickier version of Papyrus' style (and he'd probably cheat to boot.) "He attacked you earlier, right?" she asks.

Frisk shakes their head, "Well, yes, he did but he wasn't really trying then... He - " Frisk's mouth twists, "I could never beat him," they say finally. "When I.... He killed me so many times," Frisk's curls their hands into fists against their lap. "Over and over and over. And I ... I kind of wanted him too."

 _That doesn't make sense,_ Undyne wants to say. _What could you do that would make Sans want to fight you?_ But she doesn't, instead she stays quiet and still, not wanting to break whatever spell has fallen over Frisk.

They screw their face up, like they're trying not to cry, "If you fight him and he's - he's _determined_ he'll win and you'll..." Frisk looks back up at her, teary-eyed.

"Hey," Undyne says firmly. "Don't worry about me, squirt. I'm the strongest monster in the whole underground; no one's going to beat me, okay?"

Frisk doesn't look convinced but the spell must have broken because they shake their head, "Do you think we'll be too late?"

Undyne's about to grin (weakly) and say _of course not, squirt. We're the heroes, heroes always arrive in the nick of time, don't you know anything?_ just to try and make Frisk smile but as she opens her mouth they hear a long, low sound from deep within the lab and the floor trembles.

Beside her, Frisk gasps and their hands go instinctively to the locket they're wearing around their neck. She puts a hand to steady them and looks over to see Papyrus looking just as freaked.

She exchanges a look with Alphys, "You need to crack that," she says. "Now."

Alphys is nodding, "I know," she mutters. "I know, I know."

\----

Determination, Alphys told them, was key.

 _The_ key.

Stronger than magic and science combined, able to do with ease what they never could and Frisk was overflowing with it. _Humans_ were overflowing with it.

And what had Frisk done with it? Nothing.

Nothing of use.

They hadn't even saved the monsters, not truly. Asriel had done that and Frisk hadn't even been able to save him.

Everyone saw Frisk as a hero, but they weren't. Only Sans knew the truth. Sans and Flowey. The ones they couldn't save.

Alphys thought Sans was trying to fix the machine they had found in his Snowdin lab, the one Frisk had pondered over across Reset after Reset and _never_ figured out.

A time machine, Alphys had explained on their walk to Hotland, but Sans had always been missing the one thing that was sure to make it work.

Determination could only take you back so far.

Determination and a _machine_?

Well, who knew how far that could take you back?

Frisk's hand closed around the locket against their chest. They were _filled_ with determination.

Alphys whooped and the elevator doors dinged open.

\----

"This place is creepy," Undyne hisses, when the doors slide open to reveal Alphys' true lab. She's never been down here and she doesn't want to think about the hours and days Alphys spent down here alone.

The whole place is still, all there is is a distant, persistent hum. _The machine,_ Undyne thinks. _A_ machine. There's no way it's the same one.

She puts an arm out automatically to stop Papyrus charging in blindly and beckons for everyone to stay close and follow slowly, "Which way, Alphys?" she whispers.

"Right," Alphys says, uncertainly.

They edge forward slowly, Undyne pausing every few paces to pre-emptively hush Papyrus.

Alphys guides them through a dark room full of neatly made beds, peers down a corridor lined with mirrors and still-bright yellow flowers, then back to a doorway at the end of the bed chamber.

"He'll be through there," she says and her voice doesn't shake. "B - but we might be too late..."

The humming is louder now and Undyne nods, "Alright, everybody, ready? We don't know what we're gonna find in there so Alphys, you and Frisk be ready to duck and run if you need to, okay? Pap you do whatever you think you can." She's not about to ask him to attack his brother, she's not sure he _could_ to be honest.

He nods silently and Alphys says, "I can disable the machine if we get there in time. You'll just have to get me close enough to it."

Undyne beams at her, "That I'm pretty sure I can manage, Alphy."

"Just bear in mind," Papyrus says, miraculously quietly, "That he is my _brother,_ Undyne and he's not in his right mind - "

"I know that, Pap. I'll be careful, I promise." She takes a steadying breath and readies her spear, "Okay, everybody set?"

Alphys and Papyrus nod.

She takes a step into the darkened corridor.

Alphys was right.

He's down here.

At the far end the corridor opens out into a cavernous room, lit up by a large bulky machine Undyne can't see all of. Sans is knelt in front of it wearing a lab coat, fiddling with something.

"Sans!" Papyrus calls, before Undyne can stop him.

Sans looks up at them and swears, flicking his wrist to send a flurry of bones their way. Undyne swipes Frisk and Alphys, makes them green - at least they'll be able to block efficiently.

The corridor is narrow and the bones keeping coming - white and blue but Undyne deflects them all.

Behind her Papyrus looks utterly lost, "Sans?"

Sans' eye glows with blue-yellow flames, his face moulded into a snarl. He sends flurry after flurry their way but Undyne is making progress, little by little, edging up the corridor.

Alphys and Frisk are close behind, heads bent low, keeping as close to her as they can. Papyrus though is still at the entrance, staring blankly past them at his brother, "Pap," she calls once or twice, "You have to _move._ "

But he doesn't and it doesn't matter, the bones turn blue when they reach him, pass harmless through his still body.

She manages to get a few spears thrown off but Sans dodges them easily, she's readying another volley when Papyrus snaps out of his stupor, "You _can't_!" he yells.

Undyne turns to him surprise, letting Sans catch her off guard. The bones thud into her and they _hurt._ (Who knew Sans would make such an excellent challenge?) She throws a few spears back, "I'm not exactly unprovoked here, Pap!" she yells back. "I'm not gonna hurt him too bad."

"No!" Papyrus insists. "YOU CAN'T! HE'S ONLY GOT ONE HP! ONE DEFENCE!" His voice breaks, "You'll _kill_ him."

Of course he does.

That's all she needs.

She'll just have to tire him out then.

"stay out of this, Papyrus!" Sans yells back.

She turns back just in time to deflect another flurry, "That all you got?" she yells.

Sans grits his teeth and then smirks, "not by a long shot, _punk_."

And Undyne finds herself thrown suddenly to one side. She collides with the wall with a muffled thud, Alphys and Frisk right alongside her. She can't move off - something's keeping her there -

"We have to jump!" Frisk yells, panicked. "Push off as hard as you can!"

Undyne obeys unthinkingly, grabbing Alphys and shoving herself off the wall with all her might.

Just in time to avoid the bones that would have easily skewered them all.

She gapes at Sans, too startled to retaliate because that wouldn't have killed her but it would have dealt some _serious_ damage.

"stay outta my way," Sans warns.

The gravity lets up.

"Sans," Alphys tries, "We just want to help - please, let us."

Sans shakes his head, "no. you don't get it. stay _away_ or you'll _really_ have a bad time."

To illustrate his point he sends them flying, crashing into the walls, the floor, the ceiling. When he rights them again, Undyne's head is spinning.

Sans takes a step backwards, towards the machine, eyes wondering to what must be the control panel.

Now they're closer she can she he's sweating. There's something really not right with him.

And she's sure as hell not going to let him drive a time machine like that.

She takes a deliberate step towards him and his attention snaps back to her immediately, "You're gonna have to better than that, bone-head."

He glowers, sending another wave of bones that she dodges easily, "i'm _warning_ you." he says quietly.

He dodges her spears easily (not that they were meant to hit him), sends her against the wall, she escapes the bones, throws more useless spears. She just has to get Alphys up the corridor, just has to keep his attention on her.

Every step she takes, he edges backwards.

She taunts him, he bites over and over.

If she can tire him out before...

They're running out of corridor and she's almost in the room. Alphys is close behind her, "Distract him," she hisses. "I can see the controls!"

"i can _hear you_!" Sans growls, sending Alphys up towards the ceiling, then to the wall, then back down to the floor. She hits with a loud cry that makes Undyne's heart stop, "ALPHY!"

"I'm fine," Alphys wheezes, picking herself up with some difficulty.

Undyne is going to _kill_ him.

She turns back to Sans, raises her spear -

"You said you didn't want to hurt anybody!" Frisk cries, running out in front of her. "Sans, please. We just want to help."

For a moment, Sans looks conflicted but then it's gone, "it doesn't matter!" he snarls. "none of this will! just let me do this!" With his foot, he taps some of the buttons on the control panel. The machine starts to hum louder, glowing with an eerie dark purple light.

A door hisses open.

Sans reaches for a glowing yellow vial on top of the panel.

"The determination!" Alphys cries, "Don't let him!"

Undyne knocks the vial away from his hand with a well aimed spear.

"Sans, we can't let you do this," she says.

"i don't have time for this!" he yells. "don't say i didn't warn you."

And then, hovering above him, are what look like floating dragon heads.

"Oh no," Frisk whispers. "Undyne! MOVE!"

The heads let loose a burst of energy that send her flying and -

\- and that's it.

She can feel herself start to come apart.

She can feel herself un-weaving.

She's turning to dust.

"UNDYNE!" Alphys yells, somewhere.

Frisk is yelling too and maybe Papyrus - and Sans whimpering, "oh god, i didn't mean - "

She's dying.

She's done.

And then Alphys' hands are on her, "No," Alphys is saying. " _No._ You do not get to do this! I won't let you!"

And Undyne -

Undyne -

Undyne _refuses._

\----

"Undyne! MOVE!" Frisk yelled, as soon as Sans' blasters flickered into existence above him.

But she wasn't quick enough; she took their blasts full force. They should have torn her apart, _did_ tear her apart but then she stood back up. Frisk sobbed with relief.

He had known she could - he had _known_ but to see it again - and Sans looks just as relieved. Maybe this was it, maybe this would be his wake up call but it wasn't.

He had the vial again and raised it, "i have to do this," he said, raising it to his mouth.

"You'll die..."

Frisk jumped at the sudden voice to his right. Papyrus had edged towards them. He looked so _defeated_ , so hurt, so confused, "Sans - brother, please."

Sans shook his head, "i gotta do this, you'll see, Pap."

He downed the vial in one and stepped backwards into the purple light that fizzled and crackled in the centre of the machine.

And he vanished.

Papyrus fell to his knees.

The machine hummed on.

"You're alive," Alphys was chanting behind them, face buried in Undyne's neck. "You're alive, you're alive, you're alive."

"Alphy," Undyne croaked. "Alphy, the machine."

"You _died,_ Undyne! I don't really care about the machine right now!"

" _Alphys._ "

" _Fine_ ," Alphys climbed off of Undyne and turned back towards Frisk and Papyrus, back to where Sans had been, the still humming machine and empty vial. Her face fell. "Oh..."

She closed the distance, kneeling before the control panel and beginning to examine it.

With some difficulty, Undyne followed her, coming to a stop beside Frisk. Frisk leant forward and hugged her tight.

"Determination, huh, kid?" she muttered into their ear when she bent to hug them properly. When Frisk broke the hug she sank down beside Papyrus, and pulled him towards her.

Frisk's hands went to the locket as they stared up at the machine.

"It's a time machine," Alphys confirmed, voice heavy as she poured over an open journal that lay beside the control panel. "Just like we th-thought it would be."

"So, what happens now?" Undyne asked, arm still around Papyrus' shoulders. "Do we just blink out of existence if he changes stuff?"

Alphys shook her head, "I don't know. I - I don't know enough about this stuff... It's certainly possible and he seems to think so but we don't even know if it worked. He might not have gone back in time, he might have - " she stopped, gaze falling on Papyrus.

Papyrus bowed his head.

Frisk took another step forward.

"Theoretically," Alphys said softly. "The machine should send him back to wherever he wants - provided he's determined enough. He seems to think it would take him to somewhere in between so that he could choose where to go..." she paused. "D - Did you ever experience anything like that, Frisk?"

Frisk nodded.

And took another step towards the machine.

"I don't understand," Papyrus spoke, suddenly. "Why would he do this? Weren't - Weren't we enough?"

"Awh, Pap," Undyne said, softly.

Alphys shrugged sadly, "It _is_ tempting. Imagine if you could go back and relive something you regretted, over and over until you got it right." She winced then, looking to Frisk, "Sorry," she mouthed.

Frisk shook their head. They were close enough to the machine now that they could feel the heat of it on their face. The crackle and burn of the light that made their chest swell with determination.

"What do we do now?" Undyne asked.

"I - I don't know," Alphys replied. "We - I could try and turn the machine off?"

"That would bring him back, right?" Papyrus asked, immediately.

Alphys spluttered, "I - Well - It _might_ \- B-but I don't know..."

Frisk was so close now.

One step and they could go back.

It was so tempting. They could save _everyone._

The locket pounded against their chest.

The machine worked, Frisk could feel it.

They _had_ to do this, didn't they?

Frisk hesitated.

"I should go in after him," Papyrus said, standing up. "I will retrieve him!"

"Pap, _no._ " Undyne said gently, sadly. She held him back easily, gently guiding back down to the floor. "I'm not losing both of you bone-heads in one day, alright?"

"He's _not lost_ ," Papyrus said, tears falling freely now. "We'll get him back! I won't give up on him!"

Undyne smiled sadly, "Guess that's how Sans felt about his friends."

"What if we forget him?" Alphys whispered, looking horrified. "That grey k-kid said - "

Undyne was at Alphys side, "We won't. We'll figure this out, okay?" but she didn't sound convinced.

Could Frisk do this to them?

They had to.

They _had_ to.

"Frisk?" Papyrus said, uncertainly.

Frisk turned back to them, "I'm _sorry_." They said.

Papyrus looked confused, Alphys gaped in terror, Undyne shook her head, "Frisk, don't you _dare -_ "

But Frisk was determined.

They stepped into the purple light just as Undyne leaped for them.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im really not happy with this chapter but ive rewritten it a couple of times and it's not cooperating (which is why it's pretty short) so hopefully, i'll come back to it (and other parts) when all is said and done :)
> 
> that being said, i hope all of you had a good christmas/non-denominational winter festivity period/few days and if you didn't dont sweat it. next year you can all come to my house and we'll celebrate undertale style by giving presents to a bullied deer and eating spaghetti or something.

Everything around her is dark.

Not just dark - more than dark. She's never experienced anything like this before: it's like dying but not. She feels like she's floating, suspended in _nothingness._

Because it's not darkness - she knows darkness, she grew up underground. It's _emptiness._ It's _void._

And it's _wrong._

She sits up, Frisk is a little way from here, staring.

For a moment (a long, horrifying moment) there's something decidedly un-Frisk like in the squirt's eyes and it chills her to the core. But then, they shake their head, "I didn't mean to bring you with me," they say softly. "I'm sorry."

Undyne stands up, "Kid, where are we?"

Frisk shrugs, "I don't know exactly. Nowhere, I think. This is where I'd come sometimes before Resets. The big ones, not the ones after I'd..." they trail off.

Just like Alphys guessed, then. This is where the machine sent them, where Sans must have gone and passed through. "Alright," she says, decisively. "Okay, so we wait here for Sans to get back, right? He'll come back this way..." _If he comes back_ , she doesn't add. "Then we figure out how to get home. Uh, any ideas about that, kid."

Frisk bites their lip, "Your save point," they say eventually. "It's the lab. Before all this... when Sans... when _you_...."

Undyne winces a little at the memory, rubbing at her chest, just above her soul, "Yeah, yeah. I could do without reliving that, thanks." Then she frowns, "So, that's my save point? How were you planning on getting back there without me?"

Frisk shakes their head wordlessly.

Jeez. Just how much stuff have they kept from everyone?

"Frisk," Undyne says carefully. "You're coming back. With me. You got it? Even if I have to drag you there myself."

Frisk takes a step back, "I'm sorry, I can't. Not yet. There's something I have to do."

They make to run.

"Don't you _dare,_ you little - " Undyne starts, running after them but as she does so the world around them starts to change.

It feels like it's melting.

Drifting apart and reforming before her eyes, around her feet.

Frisk's stopped still a little way ahead of her.

They're in a garden now, soft grass under her feet, bird song ringing around the cavern. Sunlight filters down from cracks in the ceiling far above. If it weren't for the lack of yellow flowers, she'd say it was Asriel's courtyard. She stops running.

"Frisk," she starts, gazing around. "Where - "

Frisk holds up a hand to shush her and suddenly, Undyne becomes aware of voices close by. She looks in their direction but Frisk is tugging her towards a bush, urging her to crouch beside them. They put a finger to their lips as the source of the voices draw closer.

"Okay, Chara, are you ready?"

It's a kid speaking, definitely. Undyne peers through the leaves to see them.

"Do your creepy face!"

The kid has his back to them; he's wearing a striped shirt and is holding something up to his face.

"Is that...?" she mutters, Frisk puts a hand against her mouth.

The kid shouts in mock-terror and whoever he's talking to is visible for a split second as his cry trails off into peals of laughter.

Undyne's never seen either of them but she knows who they are instantly. Everyone in the Underground grew up hearing the story: the King and Queen, out of the goodness of their hearts, took in a human child that fell in to the ruins one day, raising her alongside their own son. The prince and princess of the underground, meant to reunite the humans and the monsters one day. But one day, the human got sick and died. The prince tried to take her body back to humans but they attacked him.

That all happened long before she was born, though.

It had never really felt _real._

The kid - or Prince, she supposes - straightens up, "Oh. Wait," he rubs the back of his neck. "I left the lens cap on..."

"No," Frisk says beside her, shaking their head. "This is too early."

For a moment, Undyne has no idea what he's talking about then she realises and raises a hand, "Frisk, _don't_ \- "

The world flickers for an instance and Undyne braces herself for whatever's coming but when she opens her eyes, they're still in the garden and the prince is still speaking.

"Oh, yeah. I remember. When we tried to make butterscotch pie for Dad, right?" He's sitting quite a way away from them. Under a tree, the princess next to him, still holding that silly camera. Undyne does a double take, aside from a slight change in colour scheme, the princess and Frisk could be twins.

"The recipe asked for cups of butter, but we accidently put in buttercups instead!"

The princess is grinning, pulling up grass as the prince speaks. The longer Undyne looks, the less she resembles Frisk. She's paler, slightly older. Her hair is straighter and lighter, a slightly softer shape and she's grinning like accidentally poisoning the king was the funniest thing in the world.

The prince's smile wavers, "Those flowers got him really sick... I felt so bad..." he looks away. "We made Mom really upset. I should have laughed it off, like you did."

Undyne shudders.

"Still too early..." Frisk mutters.

When the world reforms again, the garden is silent.

"Frisk," Undyne says quietly. "What are we here to do?"

Frisk shushes her again but after a beat they say, "To save them."

"Who? The prince and the princess?" Undyne thinks back to the story she grew up with, tries to imagine an underground that didn't lose two royal children in one day. Would they still fear humans as much? Would they have gotten to the surface quicker? Maybe.

But how are they going to stop it from happening? What does Frisk plan to do? Stop the princess getting sick?

"Frisk , I don't think this is a good idea," Undyne starts but Frisk shakes their head and points.

The prince has wondered into the garden, bending to pick a few buttercups here and there. He's walking slowly, head bent, sniffing slightly like he's been crying.

 _Oh,_ Undyne thinks. Oh.

But why would the princess poison herself? It doesn't make sense.

"I don't get it," she says, out loud, and then clamps her hand over her mouth. Frisk gapes at her.

It's too late.

The prince's ears are pricking, he looks towards the bushes, eyes suddenly wide, "Wh - Who's there?" he calls, he's trying to sound brave but failing.

Undyne and Frisk stare at each other. She knows exactly what Frisk is about to do and she has no idea what to say to stop them.

(Or if she should.)

Frisk takes a deep breath and steps out into the open.

" _Chara_?" the prince squeaks but then he shakes his head, looks at Frisk properly. He takes a step back, dropping the flowers, "You're not Chara."

Frisk shakes their head.

"H-how did you get down here? Did you fall?" he's wary, but he hasn't yelled for his parents or the royal guard yet, so that's something at least.

"Something like that," says Frisk.

"Are you looking for Chara? Because she's happy here, she's safe. She w - won't want to go back with you." His paws are glittering now with whatever weak magic he can muster.

Frisk holds up their hands to show they're unarmed, "I just want to talk."

The prince eyes him, "I - I don't know..."

"What you're doing won't work," Frisk says.

The prince pales, "I don't know what you're talking about! B-but you shouldn't be here!" He turns back, towards the palace rooms but Frisk grabs at his sleeve.

"Asriel, _please_! I know it sounds crazy b - but - "

Asriel yanks his sleeve back, "Don't do that!" He turns back towards the castle, "Mom! Dad!"

 _Oh great,_ Undyne thinks. Frisk's already messed with stuff by letting the Prince see them, but if Asgore sees her a few decades before he's supposed then - well... She steps out of the bushes, "Frisk, you have to stop. We have to go," she says urgently.

Frisk shakes their head, "I have to know if it worked!"

They hold up their hand.

Undyne closes her eyes as the world starts to shift around them.

When she opens them it's dark.

They're nearer the throne. Distantly, she can hear cries.

"No, he can't have gone up there!" It's Toriel. "He's not so... He wouldn't! They'll kill him, Asgore!"

"Now, now, my love, he must be here somewhere...." The King insists.

"No..." Frisk whispers.

Then, someone shuffles in.

Undyne turns.

The Prince is limping, dragging his feet, leaving trails of dust as he goes. There are gashes all across his soft fur, one of his ears is torn almost clear off. In his arms is the Princess. Limp and pale.

There's a locket around her neck. A locket that looks remarkably like Frisk's.

The Prince makes it a few steps into the room, gently lays his sister's body on the ground before he falls.

Frisk is at his side in an instant, "It didn't work," they say, eyes wide.

The Prince's eyes flicker open, "You?" he whispers, then he laughs weakly. "You warned me. I should have listened..."

"I'll try again," Frisk says. "I'll try until I save you, I promise."

The Prince smiles, "Save my sister too, okay?" And then he's nothing more than a cloud of dust, slowly spread across the grass.

\----

They're back in the dark place.

The place beyond darkness.

Frisk has ended up a little way from her, still kneeling facing away from her. They're stiff, rigid in a kind of frightening way.

"Uh, Frisk?" Undyne tries because she's not _scared_ of the kid but this whole thing is more than a little unsettling. She takes a step towards them. "Frisk?"

Frisk takes a deep, shuddering breath. "It didn't work." They bend their head further downwards. "I couldn't save him. _Again._ "

"Awh, squirt," she tries, reaching out to ruffle their hair, "That might be for the best, right?"

Frisk shrugs her off.

"I think we should just concentrate on finding Sans and getting back, okay? One adventure at a time, huh?"

"You don't _know,_ " Frisk says, "You don't _understand._ "

"So explain it to me."

Frisk looks up at her then, and they look _anguished._

"Frisk," Undyne says gently, "So far, you've told me you spent a good long time messing around a reliving the same few weeks over and over. I got attacked by Sans, I _died_ , except apparently didn't _and_ I went on a time travelling adventure with you. I'm pretty sure there's not much more you could tell me that could surprise me."

Frisk looks back down at their feet and then very softly says, " _I_ wasn't the one who saved everyone. _He_ did. Well, I saved him, sort of, and he opened the barrier."

Undyne frowns, "Who? Asriel? He died a long time before all that happened."

Frisk shakes their head, "No. He - The flower - "

Undyne closes her eyes. It makes sense. (Crazy, Anime-storyline sense but _sense._ ) "It came from Asgore's garden," she says. "Right where he fell?"

Frisk nods, "When Alphys injected him with determination he woke up. Only he didn't have a soul, so he wasn't really him. He did a lot of bad things but in the end... when he had a soul again, he chose to save everyone." They scrub at their face, "He didn't deserve all this. He didn't deserve to die in the first place and he doesn't deserve to be stuck down here alone all his life! He deserves better..."

"So, you want to stop him from dying in the first place? Kid, you know that's going to majorly screw everything else up, don't you? And I mean _everything._ We might _never_ meet!"

Frisk sniffs, "I _know_. But I have to _try._ If I can fix this... maybe none of the other bad stuff would happen. And Mom'd be happy! She'd still be with Asgore and she wouldn't..." They bite their lip. "I just want everyone to be happy... This might do it..."

"Or it might wreck everything!" Undyne crosses her arms, "No, you know what? I'm the adult here and I am putting my fins down! We're going back, right now!"  

She reaches and -

It's strange. She can visualise the lab, she can feel herself start to fade back into it (and it feels like taking that first gulp of fresh surface air again - like the first time she breathed _properly_ in her life) but Frisk isn't there. She can't feel them beside her.

Frisk could take her places, why can't she take them?

She frowns, tries again, this time reaching for him as well.

But Frisk refuses.

Again and again and again.

"Come _on,_ " she mutters. " _Come on._ "

Frisk watches, conflicted.

"Ngahhhh! Why isn't this working!" Undyne growls, stomping her feet in frustration.

"You're not determined enough," Frisk says simply.

Then, they vanish.

"No!" Undyne calls, " _No_! Frisk!"

But she's alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i'm kind of in two minds with how i want the next few chapters to go, part of me wants to stay with frisk for a bit while they try to fix stuff and undyne tries to talk them out of it but i know that some of you are probably mostly here for sans? so i could put that up as a separate optional side quest thing? skip ahead a bit here and just show frisk after they've learnt their lesson and get back to the sans stuff.
> 
> and be honest guys because im also not sure i could do justice to time travelling frisk and their new powers? idk


	11. Chapter 11

For a long time, Undyne sits alone in the dark.

She tries, at first, to reach for Frisk, to try and snatch them back from wherever they are and stop them before they do whatever they're trying to. She wants to go back to Alphys.

But she's sitting her outside of everything, outside of time so who knows if Alphys is even still there waiting for her.

She might have never been born.

She might have been born on the surface,

They might never have met.

Undyne draws her legs up to her chest, hugs her knees and presses her forehead into them. She breathes slow and deep, like she's taught Alphys to do when it all gets too much for her.

She reaches for Alphys again, reaches for home, the lab.

It's all still there, her Save Point.

The moment just after Sans' blaster took her out. Maybe if she can get Frisk back she can back and stop any of this from happening in the first place. And then she's wondering again how many times Frisk did this, sat here between Resets, going back through everything, wondering how best to change it.

And she has to admit, it's kind of tempting to mess around a little.

If she had a do-over she'd know to shoot that vial of determination before Sans could get his damn bony hands on it.

Yellow.

She remembered the kid, a scrappy little thing who shot first and asked questions later. She made it pretty far before Undyne caught up with her and took her to Asgore.

It makes her feel kind of sick now, thinking about it.

She sits alone and she mulls everything over. She has no idea how long she's been there, how long she'll wait.

If she goes back with Frisk or Sans they'll still be there in her timeline, she's sure of it, but what happens to these Sans and Frisk? Are they lost? Do they just carry on walled off from each other? Or do they just blink out of existance?

The whole thing makes her head hurt, this is much more Alphy's territory than it is hers. She's not smart enough for this.

Then, there is a voice from the darkness. From behind her. From above her. From all around her.

"Fascinating," the voice is a more a buzz in her head, nonsensical sound that translates itself into words. Like the grey kid in Waterfall. "That is precisely what Alphys said to us when we showed her our findings."

\----

 _No,_ Frisk thought. _No, again._

He went back to the garden, a different point this time, worded his warning slightly differently, went back to the garden that night, watched Asriel sputter out of existence.

_No, again._

The next time he spoke to Asgore, warned him of his children's plot. The King didn't listen. Asriel called Frisk Chara, thought she had been reborn. Asriel died sobbing about how sorry he was.

_Again._

Toriel listened. Toriel promised she would talk to Chara and Asriel. Somehow they both ended up dead at the foot of Asgore's throne anyway.

**_Again._ **

He spoke to Chara. Chara tried to attack them.

(The voice in the back of Frisk's head laughed and laughed and laughed.)

**_Again._ **

**_Again._ **

**_Again._ **

There were limits, Frisk learnt. They couldn't go back to before Chara fell and no matter where they wanted to go or who they wanted to see they always ended up in the palace. Asriel's Save Point.

It was probably just a coincidence, because that was that point Frisk had originally chosen to come but it still ached.

Every time they blinked into existence surrounded by greenery, imagining if this was what Asriel saw that first time. Seeing him die had been difficult, _beyond_ difficult and for the first time Frisk had wondered whether it was only their own grief and regret and rage they were feeling.

That _other_ inside of them had _howled._

**_AGAIN._ **

But no matter what, Asriel and Chara died.

No matter what Frisk knelt with their hands balled in Asriel's fur, trying to hold him together, "Next time, I'll get it right next time." They promised, over and over and over.

And there would always be a next time.

There was always something else to try.

Frisk had all the time in the world.

\----

There is a man in the dark.

Except no, there isn't.

There is a shape in the dark that looks like a man, looks like what once may have been a man. He is tall and shifting and his face is pale, split in a sad grin, flickering in and out of her sight, melting and reforming endlessly.

Maybe it's the darkness in the shape of a man.

Undyne reaches reflexively for her spear but it doesn't come.

"Who are you?" she demands and then she realises, "You're in that photo - the one Sans has."

The shape of a man inclines his head.

She takes a cautious step towards him and he doesn't seem to move but she doesn't end up any closer to him. She frowns, tries again but the same thing happens. He shakes his head sadly, "That won't work."

Undyne huffs out a sigh, "Of course," she mutters. "Why would things like _taking a step_ work properly here."

He smiles at that; at least, Undyne thinks he smiles. There is a soft contented buzzing noise that doesn't translate itself that Undyne chooses to interpret as a smile, "This place _is_ fascinating, though, is it not? Infuriating and impossible, but unavoidably interesting."

 "Infuriating, yes," Undyne agrees. "The other stuff, not so much." Another soft buzz. Undyne peers at him, tries to make him out better but he's never still enough. Or maybe he's never there enough. "So are you trapped here?"

He shakes, grows, shrinks.

It's kind of unnerving.

"Here, there," he says. "Everywhere. Unfortunately, time can be a fickle thing. Especially when you try and mess around with it."

Undyne shakes her head, "I don't understand. I mean, I know you - there was an accident, right? With that machine in Sans' house. Alphys - you know who she is, right - she said it was a time machine."She laughs softly to herself, "Looks like she was right, huh?"

He nods, "It took me a while too. Or, perhaps it just took me a while to accept. It is an horrific notion, is it not? Not only to be destroyed but to be trapped, doomed to watch the world and the people you care most about live on without the knowledge you ever existed."

Undyne nods faintly, "You said that in Waterfall."

A smile again. The buzz is oddly warm against her ear. "I found that there are times I can reach through. Briefly. Most people forget about it as soon as they turn away but some remember. At first, I went to Sans often," The buzz grows lower, sounds pained. "He could never remember me for long though, never properly."

"He's looking for you, you know."

"Yes. I do. I had hoped he would have forgotten entirely by now. I hate to see him... so hurt." He ripples, "It would have been better if he had moved on."

Undyne snorts, "I don't think that was ever going to happen. I mean, he's damn near torn the world apart to get you back."

"I know." There's a soft undercurrent of warmth again.

"Who is he to you?" Undyne asks, suddenly curious.

Another ripple. "He is... _was_ very dear to me."

"Did he come through here, before me?"

"Yes."

Undyne smiles, "Did you speak to him?"

"I...Did not."

Undyne's smile fades, "What? Why not?"

"I told you," the buzz grows harsher. "I wished him too move on."

The hot flash of anger she feels is swallowed up by the realisation, "You don't think he can save you?"

"If there is a way, it is not this one."

"Why not?"

He sighs, (a soft, high buzz accompanied by a flicker,) "It is difficult to explain but it seems that despite the limitless ways things can be changed there are certain events seem to continually find ways of happening. The accident is one of them. The death of the prince and princess seems to be another."

"You know what Frisk is doing?"

"I have watched the child for a long time, through all of their Resets. They have been trying to save the Prince for a long time."

"So, you've seen everything Frisk ever did?"

He seems to know where this conversation is going, he buzzes low and long. "I do. They are not my stories to tell."

Undyne doesn't bother to hide her disappointment. Instead, she sinks back to down to sit on the ground, "So they're both wasting their time," she says quietly. "Asriel can't be saved. _You_ can't be saved." She looks up at him, "What about the others in that photograph?"

He shakes sadly, "That I cannot tell you. It is one of the greatest mysteries of my predicament. I have never seen them here but they appear sometimes, I have seen them, in the Underground. For a brief moment they seem as though their lives have carried on, they chat passersby but then they vanish."

He's quiet then for a long while.

"They were not in the machine when the accident occurred," he says eventually. "They were all outside it, running tests, recording things. I fell into the centre. Or perhaps I wanted to be there, I don't properly recall. But it seems that while I was scattered across space and time they were simply erased but for a minor slip up here and there."

"And Sans?"

There is a great warmth in the buzz that follows, "Sans was not at the lab that day. He had taken the day off for Papyrus' birthday."

Undyne smiles at that. "Will you tell me about them if I'm waiting here long enough?"

"Of course. But, you should know, you will most likely not remember this when you leave here. The child never did."

"You spoke to Frisk?"

"Occasionally. It gets rather lonely here."

Undyne nods, she can only have been here for a few hours, maybe a day at the most, but she's already _aching_ for company. "I don't even know your name," she notes, absently.

"You won't remember it when - "

"Yeah, yeah," Undyne cuts him off. "It doesn't matter. I just need something better to call you than 'Dark-Blob-Man.'"

There's a snort of what might be amusement but could easily be disgust, "Well, I would certainly prefer you didn't refer to me as... _that._ Gaster. My name was Gaster."

\----

There was one thing Frisk hadn't tried, they realised that around the hundredth time they watched Asriel die.

There was a reason they hadn't tried it, they thought, around the hundred-and-thirtieth time.

A reason they were trying to talk themselves out of.

They could kill Chara before she had the idea to poison herself.

They would have to be careful about it, if a human was caught killing the Princess of the Underground it would start another war. Asgore would make sure of it. And they would have to make sure Chara's soul was long gone by the time anyone found her otherwise there would be nothing to stop Asriel using it to cross the barrier.

And they would have to kill her.

Before, every time they had killed it had been easy because it hadn't felt like _they_ were the ones doing the killing. It had been someone else slashing with the knife, lashing out with pointed shoes.

But that someone wasn't helping anymore.

But that someone couldn't do anything to stop Frisk.

**_Again._ **

Frisk was in the palace, grass beneath their feet.

Chara sat alone, back to them.

It wouldn't be easy.

But it would fix things.

No Chara meant no poison. No Asriel dying.

They would make it look like an accident, somehow. No one would have to know.

It would make things better.

And, in the long run, wasn't it better to save one life at the cost of another rather than losing both?

( _No,_ everything inside them insisted. _No._ )

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry it's another short one this time but i didn't see the point in dragging it out also no sans again whoops :')
> 
> don't worry guys he'll be back soon i promise
> 
> not 100% sure about my gaster characterisation? thoughts? i know people's headcanon gasters vary wildly so hes kind of tricky to write!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is another chapter that just wouldn't go my way but i think it turned out okay?
> 
> happy late new year guys hopefully 2016 is fucking awesome for all of you and as always, thank you so, so much for all the comments and kudos. i know i dont reply and that probably irks some of you but trust me, they mean a fuck tonne

"If Frisk does not return," Gaster buzzes. "What do you intend to do?"

It has been hours, days, weeks maybe. Undyne has given up trying to keep track. Gaster has told her stories about his life, about his fellow workers, about things he's seen, about things he's heard. Turns out being spread across space and time has its advantages sometimes.

She's not cold anymore, there's a warmth in her soul, tugging at her. Alphys. She's still there. The lab is still there and that must mean whatever Frisk is doing it hasn't changed things yet. She's asked Gaster if he can see that far, if he knows whether Frisk will succeed. Gaster has said nothing but Undyne's not sure whether that's because he doesn't want to tell her or whether he doesn't know.

"He'll come back," Undyne says. She can't exactly go back without him, anyway. Toriel would tear her to pieces. "Just hopefully before he tears a hole in reality, or something."

Gaster rumbles in a way that Undyne is pretty sure is supposed to be a laugh.

Undyne frowns, "Do you already know what's going to happen?"

He's quiet then, quiet for a long time. "I know what _may_ happen," he says eventually. "Just as I always do. But for you, here and now, no. I do not know precisely what will happen. I know what I hope will happen, though." He drones suddenly, a low tone that reverberates through her. "Here they come now."

And just like that Frisk appears.

Their face is puffy, their eyes red rimmed, one hand is clenched around that stupid stick they've been carrying about forever and the other is around the locket. Frisk looks up at Undyne briefly before shaking their head and looking down at their feet, "I couldn't do it." They grit out.

Undyne looks towards Gaster who remains silent. "Couldn't do what, squirt?" she asks gently.

Frisk clutches the stick so hard Undyne hears it crack, "I found a way to save him but I _couldn't_. I couldn't do it." They tremble and bend over, they're almost hyperventilating.

Undyne goes to them, crouches down in front of them and puts a comforting hand on their back, "Hey, hey, calm down, punk. You're okay." She frowns, looks them up and down. "You're okay, right?"

Frisk nods, then shakes their head, "I couldn't do it!" they wail, looking up at her, tears in their eyes. "I _failed._ "

"What couldn't you do?"

Frisk takes a few deep breathes, steadying themself. "Kill her," they say quietly. "I - It was the only way I could think of to... If I killed her before she had the chance to poison herself then..." they explain. "But I couldn't. I couldn't do it."

Despite herself, Undyne laughs. "Frisk, don't you think it's maybe a _good_ thing that you couldn't kill her?"

Frisk sniffs loudly as they consider this, "But I couldn't - "

"Yeah, you couldn't save one person at the cost of another. That doesn't sound like you did anything wrong. Not by my standards anyway."

Frisk looks down, "I'd have been saving her too, I think."

"By killing her? Frisk, you've got some funny ideas about being a hero." she says it softly, with a curl of amusement so they won't take it personally. "What would make you think that?"

Frisk swallows. "She's - She's been with me since I got here. To the underground. I can't always feel her but she's there. It's like... It's like having this other person in my chest only she's not always awake."

Undyne stares.

Frisk flinches. Physically _flinches._ "You don't believe me," they say in a rush. "I knew you wouldn't - "

"No, it's not that," Undyne assures them, "It's just... A lot to take in. And I'm not exactly having an easy week," she smiles. "Think you could back track a little?"

Frisk's mouth works soundlessly for a few moments, like there's something stopping them from getting the words out but then:

"My first time in the Underground I killed a Froggit. I - I didn't mean to. I thought I'd just knock it out and Mom was mad at me but she talked to me about it and I didn't do it again that time. But it felt _good_ , I remember that. There was something about it that felt good," they're talking quietly, quickly, like if they stop and think they might never say any of this.

That would be their LV increasing, their execution points, Undyne thinks. She knows the rush that comes with it well. There are ways in the underground of increasing your LV without killing things but you can only get so far without EXP. It never felt good for Undyne. It isn't supposed to. But she bites her tongue and lets Frisk speak.

"So I got past Asgore and went through the barrier. Only, I didn't end up on the surface, I ended up here." They look over Undyne's shoulder briefly, at Gaster. It's the first time they've acknowledged they've acknowledged his presence. Gaster doesn't seem surprised. "That was you, right?"

Gaster flickers, "Perhaps."

Frisk's eyes are back on Undyne, "So I did it all again. This time I helped everyone, I made friends with Papyrus, I had cooking lessons with you, I found Alphys' true lab, I did everything right. We made it out. Asriel broke the barrier and we made it out. But not everybody was happy so I went back, again and again and again, trying to get everybody their best ending.

They look down, "But there was _always_ someone I couldn't save, someone I couldn't make happy and no matter what I did I couldn't change it! So I got angry. I beat up Mom's training dummy, I started killing monsters because I - " their voice breaks. They bite their lip, "You'll think I'm a monster," they whisper.

"Well, I know you're not a monster," Undyne says softly. "We're a completely different species, remember?"

Frisk smiles faintly. "That's when I started to feel her properly. We went through together, I killed everyone I met after the ruins. Papyrus, you, Mettaton. I was just so _angry_ and I let her... But we made it through and I was back here again and she said we should do it again. Differently, this time." Frisk swallows. "We killed everyone that time. Not just the ones that we ran in to, we actually _waited_ for more to come. And by the end of it... I don't think I was even me anymore..."

Undyne's trying to picture Frisk killing people, killing _anyone_. She can't. It's wrong. It makes her feel sick.

"Sans stopped me," Frisk says. "He - He called out to me and even though she was in control I heard him...." They shake their head. "B-but before that I met Flowey - Asriel he told me that he did the same thing when he could reset. It made me realise that we weren't so different... I'm just as bad as he is!" Frisk slams his fists on the ground.

It takes a few moments for Undyne to be able to form comprehensive sentences again, "No," she says softly. "You're not. You stopped, you said it yourself and you weren't even in control so..."

"That's not an excuse," Frisk mumbles, "I let her in, I _let_ her control me. I just wanted to see what would happen... But after that she was still there... when I Reset when I started again, she was there and I could feel her. She was sad about Mom and at the end, when Asriel opened the barrier she was... proud of him. Chara was so angry he'd ended up that way, she'd never wanted to hurt him, not really. I don't think she really understood what she'd be starting..."

"Or perhaps," Gaster interjects, "You have had as much an effect on her as she has had on you."

Frisk is quiet then, contemplating. Then, they look back to Undyne, "Are you angry with me?"

"You know," Undyne says, after a beat. "Mostly I'm just mad that somewhere out there there's a me who lost to someone so puny!"

Frisk gives a surprised burst of laughter and Undyne bumps them affectionately on the arm, "Look, squirt, whoever that kid was who did all those terrible things they weren't you."

"It was though," they say softly.

"Well, maybe then. But not _now_ , right?"

Frisk nods, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I dragged you here. We should have been looking for Sans and I got distracted..."

"That's alright; you can make it up to me somehow!"

"And I guess this has all been for nothing since..."

"Perhaps not," Gaster buzzes. Frisk turns to his general direction and then takes a few steps towards him. They gets closer than Undyne could and a dark tendril shoots out to brush at their cheek. It almost tender. "I am sorry I did not announce myself before," he says softly.

Frisk shakes their head, "That's okay; I know you can be shy sometimes."

A rumble of laughter and then, "Child, did it ever occur to you that you needn't change things to save the prince? He is still alive, in some manner of speaking at least, all that he lacks is a soul."

"Well, yes," Frisk says frowning, "At first I thought I could absorb his soul and take it back with me but..."

"Humans cannot absorb monster souls," Gaster finishes for them. Then he buzzes, "But monsters can."

Frisk stares at Gaster for a moment and then slowly, they turn to Undyne, wide eyed.

Undyne snorts, "Did you forget already you're not in this alone, punk?"

Frisk runs to her, hands grasping at the hem of her t-shirt, "Would you do it?" They cry. "If we went back to that evening, would you do it? Would you help me save him?"

They look so damn _hopeful._ It's pretty cute, actually.

"Of course I would, squirt! Not like there's anything else to do around here anyway."

Frisk stares up at her with an expression of wordless gratitude. Then they hug her, so tight she's surprised they haven't broken anything yet. Undyne hugs them back.

"We have to wait for Sans though," Frisk says, when they finally let her go.

"No," Gaster buzzes sadly. "You should not. Sans - or at least this version of him - was doomed as soon as he absorbed that determination. It is a wonder he has not disintegrated already. But there is another version of him you can save. I believe it is within your capabilities to go back and prevent this from ever happening?"

Undyne nods, "I think so."

"Will we remember this? When we go back?" Undyne asks.

Gaster ripples, "I do not know. No one has before but no one has come to this place in the particular way that you two did so I cannot say."

"Guess this is goodbye then," she says, briskly because she has no real idea of what you're meant to say when you're bidding farewell to someone who mostly exists outside of space and time. "But listen: if there's a way, we'll get you back, I promise."

"That I do not doubt," Gaster says, a tendril curling out in her direction. It doesn't quite brush against her but its close enough that she can feel his warmth.

"And if Sans comes back through here, you talk to him," she commands. "You owe him that, at least."

"Yes. I suppose I do..."

"Goodbye, Gaster," Frisk says. "We'll save you."

Gaster rumbles, deep and warm, "I hope so. And I hope not to see you again, child. Here, at any rate. Now, please. You should be going."

It's obvious Frisk isn't sure about leaving him and for the first time Undyne wonders about how often Frisk sat here in the dark with only Gaster for company. Asking him advice and questions, dark tendrils weaving themselves around him in the parody of a hug. She wonders if Gaster was any less cryptic than he had been with her.

A tendril shoots out and brushes Frisk's hair.

"Go," Gaster insists and so they do.

\----

Frisk takes them directly to the foot of the throne this time, Asriel already lying with his chest heaving, hand outstretched towards his sister's body. Frisk drags her by the hand over to him and he looks up at them.

Undyne smiles at him and she can see the confusion in his eyes, "You - Who - " he stammers.

"It's alright," Frisk says from behind her. "I figured it out, Asriel. You're going to be alright. Just stay determined."

Asriel's gaze flickers between them, "I can't - " he starts but then his eyes flutter shut and his soul is there, hovering just above him. Undyne moves forwards quickly, grasps it and gently cups it to her chest.

It's soft and incredibly warm.

She presses.

"Whoa," she whispers. There's a whole other life inside her, a whole other person beating in her chest. She looks to Frisk, "This is how you feel all the time, squirt?"

Frisk nods.

"Except, I guess your chest-mate is a little less warm."

Again, Frisk nods, this time a sad little smile on their face.

"Okay, guess we better be getting back."

Frisk takes her hand again.

"So," she asks conversationally. "What's our plan? How're we dealing with Sans?"

"You just have to keep dodging," Frisk says. "He can't keep attacking forever."

Undyne takes a deep breath and closes her eyes.

 ** _Again_** , she thinks.

\----

you're back in that dark place.

you're such a fucking joke. such a fucking mess. you thought you could fix this and all you've done is shot yourself full of a drug that's burning you from the inside out.

and you failed.

(of course you failed, you always fail, always will. that's why you gave up in the first place, remember?)

you knew as soon as you swallowed down the last of that kid, the last of what made that kid so plucky, so clever that you only had one shot. monsters can't take determination, it melts them, burns them, breaks them. you felt it hot and acidic in your chest, the place where organs would be if you had them, you felt it running through your bones creating rivets, fractures, one tap and you'd be dust on the floor you're so fragile.

you wouldn't get a reset, you wouldn't get a second chance.

so you do what you've never done once in your pathetic life: you take the direct route.

you materialise in the middle of the lab - _your_ lab - _his_ lab - and Alphys and the others all look at you with pale faces and tell you you're looking a little rough around the edges (and you're dripping on the floor by this point, you're sure, barely holding yourself together but suddenly you're remembering _everything_ and that's enough to make you hold yourself together.)

when you find him you want to fall to your knees and fucking wail and cry and scream and have him put you back together in that gentle way of his. you want to hold him tight and never let go. you want him to fucking hold _you_ tight and tight and tighter until you disappear inside and never ever have to be away from him again.

but you're not _that_ much of a wreck.

(not yet, anyway.)

you sit down, you explain everything calmly and he's fascinated, you can tell by the light in his eyes and the way he leans forward and the way his gestures get sloppy so that if you didn't know him well you'd have trouble understanding a word he was saying. but you know him better than anybody.

you know that he's only not worried because he's too caught up in the novelty of it all and he was always doing that - putting the science before everything else, focussing on the equations and the experiments and realising too late about everything else.

it should hurt a bit that he's not in pieces over what you've done to yourself to get back to him but it doesn't because if he was, that wouldn't be him. that wouldn't be Gaster. your Gaster.

god, you fucking love him so damn much.

but you know what does hurt?

the realisation that even though you've ripped a hole in space and time and hurt pretty much everyone else in your life to get here, he's still got every intention of going through with it.

it makes you want to scream.

it makes you want to laugh.

it makes you want to cry.

of _course_ you couldn't change his mind. maybe this was always meant to happen, maybe it was always you appearing that spurred him on, that proved to him the machine could work if he kept tinkering.

god, you've made such a mess of this.

you don't tell him this, any of this.

you just sit with him, watch him work until your soul is fucking _screaming_ and you flicker out of existence, out of his timeline.

and _no,_ you think, you cry. _n_ o. you just wanted to see him, be with him. if you were, dying wouldn't be so bad, you think.

( _sorry, Pap, i'm so, so sorry. you're better off,_ you want to add but how can he be better off with one less person that loves him in his life you fucking _moron_ )

the darkness surrounds you, swallows you up. it'll be over soon, you know. at least you won't have to deal with this anymore.

and then there's a voice, _oh, Sans. what have you done to yourself?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> decided that frisk going back to kill chara might end up being a separate story and also that this frisk probably wouldn't be able to go through with it. post-genocide pacifist run frisk might do though ;)


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so whoops as most of you pointed out i made kind of a mistake last chapter which is what happens when you only write at stupid o'clock in the morning. i swear, i did actually know about the soul thing because when i was planning out these chapters before christmas i remember being like "guh guess i can't do that" but whatevs, i'll fix it at some point. let's just say there was some other reason frisk couldn't take asriel's soul?
> 
> anyway, sorry this took a while i had a whole asgore-toriel subplot i was gonna put in but i think i'm going to put that in my prospective souless!frisk story so on with the show!

so here you are at the end of the world, (your world), here you are breaking down and drifting apart and any second now you'll be gone, you'll not have to fucking suffer anymore and you're not sure how you feel about that.

it's something like relief, something like resignation but none of that matters right now because his hands are on you, soothing gentling and god, you don't care if this isn't real, you don't care if this is a delusion or an hallucination or a nightmare, you don't care you just want to _disappear_ into him and never, ever come out again.

you fall against him, fall into him and he lets you. _i tried to save you,_ you tell him, _i sat you down and explained everything, told you what would happen but... you did it anyway. i tried, Gaster, i tried -_

he's all around you now, holding you safe, holding you still, (the only thing holding you together.) _but you knew that would happen,_ he says, softly, sadly. he leans down, rests his head against yours. _you knew,_ he insist.

and yeah, you did. you did the second you got there but you still had to try.

 _was it my fault,_ you mumble into his blackness. _did i do this to you?_

Gaster rumbles, it doesn't sound like his laugh, not here in this nothing place but it _feels_ like it. _no,_ he says, _i'm afraid that was my hubris. you always said it'd get me into trouble in the end._

god, this hurts. this hurts more than you've ever imagined it would.

 _i'd do it again,_ you say. _even if i knew it would do no good, i'd keep doing it._

_i know you would. that was always your problem. you care too much._

you want to laugh at that because if only he fucking knew.

if only he fucking knew.

this is the part where you're supposed to make a joke, diffuse the situation and Gaster will rumble out a laugh and you'll, you don't know, ride off into the fucking sunset on a horse or something. but you're tired and you've never liked those kinds of movies and you've never ridden a horse but you're pretty sure they startle easily so they're probably not overly fond of skeletons.

you press yourself as close as you can to Gaster's darkness, _wanna go to grillby's wimme? i know you're not really a fan but i promise not to stare if you drown it all in ketchup._

and then -

and _then -_

it's really warm, in his arms.

-

"UNDYNE!" Alphys is yelling, distantly.

Undyne comes back to herself slowly, like waking up from a long dream. It takes a moment to convince herself that she's not in that dark place anymore.

She hears Papyrus crying and Sans mumble something.

She opens her eyes and Alphys is there, tears running down her snout, " _Undyne_?" She reaches out hesitantly, touches Undyne's face.

 _God,_ it's the best thing Undyne's ever felt, "Alphy," she smiles.

"You're alive...?" Alphys mumbles, gazing down at her. "You're alive, you're alive, you're _alive_..."

" _Alphy_." she leans forwards, nuzzles against her. " _Alphy._ "

Frisk touches her on the arm, "Undyne," they say softly.

Right. Teary reunions later. Undyne sits up, just in time to see Papyrus step between her and Sans, "You'll die..." he says, quietly. "Sans - brother, please..."

" _Undyne,_ " Frisk urges.

"i gotta do this," Sans is saying.

"Don't miss," Frisk says.

Undyne sits up, spear in hand, "I won't." she assures them.

It's a small target, a tiny vial clutched tight in Sans' hand but Undyne's not Captain of the Royal Guard for nothing.

"you'll see, pap," Sans says and he's raising it to his lips.

Undyne doesn't miss.

The vial shatters, the bright liquid sprays everywhere and for a moment, Sans stares blankly at his hand.

"Undyne!" Papyrus rounds on her, "You could have _hit_ him!"

Undyne stands up, "But I _didn't_."

Sans is still staring at the broken vial in his hand. It's like someone's hit pause on their lives, they're all standing there, holding their breath, waiting for something to happen. Then, slowly, Sans turns to look at the machine.

"You can't," Frisk says, pre-emptively. "If you go through without the determination, you'll die."

Sans doesn't turn away, "oh, yeah? you're an expert now, are ya kid?"

"If you go through like that you'll end up just like him," Frisk insists.

Sans turns back at that, "you been messing around with time again?" He doesn't sound accusatory, he doesn't sound angry, he sounds tired. Resigned, like all the fights gone out of him, it's how he sounds when he's drunk, slurring and swaying and telling her over and over that there's no point. Why bother? Nothing's ever going to be okay.

"We went through after you," Undyne says, Alphys and Papyrus both look like they're going to ask questions so she shushes them.

"heh, thought there was something off here," Sans mutters.

"Your plan doesn't work, bone-head," Undyne continues, taking a cautious step towards him. "So you might as well step away."

"Sans, please," Papyrus adds.

Sans is quiet again and for a moment, Undyne thinks she's won. He'll back off, he'll know they're right, they can get some rest and get this all soothed out and there'll be tears and stuff (probably) and then they can figure out a way to get Gaster out of that place.

(He's fading in her mind, she realises, she _knows_ he exists, she knows she spoke to him - she _thinks_ \- she liked him but she can feel him slipping through her fingers - this must be how Sans felt remembering him and forgetting him over and over and over - )

"Sans?" Frisk prompts, very, very quietly.

Sans is looking back at the machine, "you know," he says in a soft voice. "i've never been able to get it to work before. never, not once. not once through all that, through all the do-overs, for all the different lives, i've never, _ever_ been able to get it to work."

"after the accident - _his_ accident - i kept working, i didn't know what for or why or when i started but whenever i remembered to, i kept working. you'd be surprised what i can do when i really put my mind to it," he pauses, sneaks a quick look at Papyrus, "well, maybe _you_ wouldn't. but anyway, at the time i figured it was the accident that broke time, that one event rippling backwards and forewords, messing things up for the rest of us. it makes sense, right? it did to me half the time at least, but now i think it might have been different. i think we already knew it was possible, saving and resetting, to be able to mould the world perfectly. i think that's what he was trying to do when he built this thing."

"but i don't know anymore, i don't remember what came first. i dunno if it even really matters anymore, to tell ya the truth... all i know is that i've never once been able to make this machine work and call me crazy but i don't think it's a coincidence," he turns back to them and abruptly, the whites of his eyes vanish.

Undyne's seen him do this once or twice before, never seriously though, always as a joke. Like the first day she'd met him when Pap convinced her to hire him as a sentry.

" _That's_ your brother?" she'd snorted. "He's even less intimidating then you! Look at him, he barely comes up to my ankle!"

And Sans, calm as ever had winked at her, "oh, i dunno, undyne," and his eyes had flickered out and his voice had changed. "i can be pretty intimidating when i wanna be."

"there's no way i'm gonna let this opportunity go to waste," he says and in a flash the gaster blasters are back.

Papyrus makes a strangled, frustrated noise and Frisk lets out a short, high wail.

"It'll be okay, punk," Undyne says, gently pushing them behind her. "He's still out of determination, right, Alphys?"

"Uh, no there's - there's at least one more vial somewhere around here," she admits. "B-but it doesn't look like he's got it with him s - so he'll have to - "

"Go through us," Undyne mutters.

"you could leave," Sans suggests. "let me do this nice and easy and no one'll  get hurt."

Undyne pulls out her spear, just keep dodging Frisk had said. He can't attack forever. "People are already hurt!" she snaps. "Can't you see that?"

"i didn't ask you to come after me!" he yells, shooting a burst of bones their way.

"What were we supposed to do!?" Undyne yells back. "Leave you to kill yourself?"

Sans glowers, "get outta my way!" he snaps. "or i'll - " the blasters hum with energy.

"Do your _worst_ ," Undyne snarls. "Go back to the end of the hall," she adds, to Frisk and Alphys and Pap, "Wait, I'll deal with this."

Sans grins, "what? no please?"

Undyne braces herself, she just has to figure out their pattern, wear him down. It'll be easy after a while. She takes a breath and the blasters mouths crack open, bright white energy fizzling into existence but then -

Papryus steps forwards, an orange glow in his eyes.

The blaster's mouths snap shut.

 "get outta the way, Pap," Sans says.

"No. I refuse," Papyrus says. "This has gone on long enough, brother and I'm not going to stand by and watch you hurt our friends."

" _Papyrus,_ " Sans hisses.

Papyrus takes a deep breath and waves some bones into existence, walking towards his brother. "If you truly want to kill yourself, brother, than I - the - the _Great_ Papyrus - shall endeavour to stop you." His voice trembles.

"Papyrus - " Undyne begins, because Pap is _nowhere_ near powerful enough to fight his brother and come out on top.

Sans arms drop limply to his side, "i'm not gonna fight you, Pap."

Papyrus takes a deep breath, "And I will not move, brother. So you have a choice to make: either you stop this or we must fight and..." he breaks off for a moment. "And I shall have to best you in combat!"

" _Pap,_ " Sans says. "please, you don't understand - "

"So _tell me_!"

Sans looks back at the machine then back to his brother, "you _wouldn't_ understand..."

"Maybe not," Papyrus agrees. "But I'll try."

He takes a few final steps, comes to a halt close enough to snatch Sans away from the machine.

The blasters behind Sans vanish, "i'm sorry, Pap," Sans says quietly. "i really screwed up this time, huh?"

Papyrus smiles, "You could say that." He opens his arms and Sans sort of melts into them, falling forwards with a soft, anguished sound.

"Alphys," Undyne starts but Alphys is already a few steps ahead, hurrying over to the machine. After a few moments of tinkering there's a low whirring sound and the machine's lights blink out.

Sans doesn't look up.

\----

"So you actually _time travelled_?" Alphys says, eyes wide.

Undyne grins, "Yup! It was not as fun as those movies we watched said it would be."

It's been a few hours since they powered down the machine. Sans and Frisk are sleeping it off in that creepy room with all the beds with Papyrus on guard since he's back to insisting he doesn't need rest. Alphys of course is investigating the machine, dropping their conversation completely every now and again to hum or mumble under her breath to a handful of wires or gears or whatever it is she's found.

"I think the point of those movies is to show us it's _not fun,_ " Alphys says, shoving her snout into a different hatch. "And you actually absorbed the Prince's soul."

Undyne rubs her chest reflexively, "Yeah. Weird, huh?"

Alphys withdraws and fixes her with a warm look, "Weird isn't the word for it. It should be _impossible_. Only really powerful beings can absorb souls."

"What? You saying you didn't think I was powerful? Alphy  I'm hurt!"

Alphys chuckles, "No, that's - " she sighs, closing the distance between them and leaning up against Undyne. Undyne's sitting so they're nose to nose, eye to eye. "I didn't think monsters could have determination. Not naturally, nothing in my research suggested it was possible."

"Well," Undyne winks, "I always liked the idea of being the exception to the rule. The _outlier._ "

Alphys giggles and kisses her gently. "Don't do that to me again," she says, when she pulls away. "Not ever, okay? I don't know what I would have done if - "

"Don't worry, Alphy," Undyne says, holding her tight. "I think after this one I might call it quits on the whole adventuring front."

"Yeah," Alphys mutters. "Until Frisk decides they want to rescue some other put upon society, or Papyrus decides he wants to visit a jungle."

"Well, alright," Undyne concedes. "There might be _exceptions_."

"There always are."


	14. Chapter 14

When Frisk woke up, the lab was quiet and still. Someone had tucked them in as they slept.

Frisk rolled over. Papyrus had fallen asleep again, slumped over on his brother's bed. Sans was awake, staring up at the ceiling blankly.

Frisk waited for him to notice them.

"whatcha looking at kid?" Sans asked eventually. "you're meanta be sleeping. been a big few days for you."

Frisk gave him a meaningful look and Sans snorted, "guess i kinda walked into that one, huh?"

After a few minutes indecision Frisk slipped off their own bed and stood beside Sans', Sans sat up to peer at him, "you, uh, you have a nightmare, or something?"

Frisk shook their head but Sans shifted a little to make room for them anyway.

For a long while they lay beside each other in silence, listening to Papyrus snoring. Part of Frisk wanted to reach out but each time they tried to the memory of Sans' blaster hitting Undyne replayed itself in their head. Frisk sighed, burrowing deeper into Sans' blankets.

"ya know," Sans said eventually. "Pap used to climb into bed with me a lot when he was little. actually, he still does. I used to think it was just when he'd had a bad dream or he'd lost his favourite action figure but sometimes it wasn't." Sans shifted. "i'm okay, kid. you know that, right?"

Frisk rolled their eyes.

"alright, alright, maybe i'm pretty far from okay. but i don't need you babysitting me."

"Last time we left you alone things didn't go so well," Frisk said, quietly.

Sans looked vaguely amused, "oh, you talk now, huh? you talk that way to your mother?"

Frisk shook their head, "She'd be so mad," they muttered, trying to picture it.

Sans smiled, "yeah, i bet. she scary when she's mad?"

"Scarier than _you._ "

"scarier than _me?_ hey, im a skeleton! we're pretty much the _spookiest._ buuut i guess moms can be pretty scary. especially boss monster moms. but i wouldn't know, i don't have the _guts_ to challenge someone like that."

Frisk laughed, more out of surprise than in response to the joke. It wasn't one of Sans' best but he'd made a _joke_ and it had been so long since Frisk had heard him do that.

Sans' shook his head, "i'm sorry, kid. i shouldn't have put you through this. any of you." He reached out to touch his brother's hand. "i shoulda just manned up and - " he trailed off.

Frisk shifted closer so that their shoulders brushed and when Sans didn't move away he reached down and took Sans' other hand with a reassuring smile.

Sans smiled, "heh heh, guess you know what I'm going through better than everyone." His smile wavered, "I'm glad you figured out how to get Asriel outta there. kid might be a little weird but he doesn't deserve to live like that...glad you managed to save him at last. must feel pretty great, huh?"

Frisk found themself nodding before they really thought about it and Sans almost visibly flinched. He was trying _so hard_ to be happy for Frisk and Frisk knew that but they also knew that half of Sans would be focussing on the fact that he hadn't managed to save Gaster.

Frisk grasped Sans hand tighter, "We'll - " they began but Sans shook his head.

"don't, kid. just... just don't, okay?"

And he rolled away/

-

When Frisk next woke Sans was asleep, the kind of exhausted, boneless sleep that Frisk knew meant he'd probably lain awake most of the night. Frisk yawned and stretched, looking around for Papyrus.

"DARN!"

They heard, distantly.

"WHAT KIND OF KITCHEN DOESN'T HAVE SPAGHETTI _ANYWHERE_?"

Frisk was initially confused, in all their wanderings of the hidden lab they'd _never_ stumbled on anything more kitchen-y than the cluster of chisps dispensing vending machines in the entryway but eventually, they shrugged and padded out of the bed chamber, following the sound of Papyrus' voice.

They found him in a room Frisk was _certain_ hadn't been there before, at the end of the room with all the fans in. It was a quaint little kitchen, done in a cheery yellow with a neat little dining table and chairs in the centre of it. Frisk announced their presence by pulling out a chair and sitting down.

"HM?" Papyrus looked up from whatever he was mixing. "Ah! Human! You're awake! Did you sleep well? I searched this place high and low for spaghetti but there wasn't any! There wasn't even _pasta_. So, I'm making pancakes instead."

Frisk beamed. Papyrus' pancakes were pretty good, better than Toriel's even.

"I wish I could have found some spaghetti," Papyrus lamented as he stirred. "It's Sans' favourite, you know." At Frisk's encouraging look he smiled, "I suppose pancakes are good too. And they're probably more of a breakfast food though I don't see _why_ pasta shouldn't be considered as such no matter _what_ Toriel says... Hey, human, think you could go and find Undyne and Alphys? I wouldn't want them to go without breakfast. It's the most IMPORTANT meal of the day, after all!"

Frisk nodded, sliding off the chair.

"EXCELLENT!" Papyrus cackled as he began pouring the mixture into the sizzling pan. "These will be the _GREATEST_ pancakes in all the Underground!"

-

Frisk found Alphys and Undyne in the room Sans had built his machine. A few stray bones and spears still littered the floor.

Undyne had fallen asleep in a chair and miraculously, she'd leant back and jammed herself in just a way between the wall and a nearby desk that she wasn't in danger of topping over. Alphys was working quietly nearby.

She smiled when she saw Frisk, crinkling up her snout and adjusting her glasses. She beckoned for Frisk to come closer, "I think I've figured out how Sans got his machine to work," she whispered excitedly when Frisk knelt down beside her. She indicated the illegible notes in front of her. "It's _genius._ O-of course I could have j-just asked him but..." her cheeks coloured.

Frisk put a hand on her shoulder.

"I - I know. It's silly, he didn't _mean_ to hurt Undyne b- but..." she lifted her head. "Do I smell pancakes?"

Frisk nodded.

"Is Papyrus making them?"

When Frisk nodded again, Alphys let out a little squeal of delight and quickly clamped her hands over her mouth, "Whoops!" she hissed, looking over worriedly at Undyne (who snored blissfully on.) "We should probably wake her though. She'd throw me in the trash can again if she missed Papyrus' pancakes."

Alphys stood and woke up Undyne with a gentle kiss on the cheek.

Undyne gave a very _un_ -gentle snort and jerked awake, "Wh - Wha?" She rubbed the sleep out of her eye and stretched, narrowly missing Alphys with her fist. "Ooops, sorry, Alphy."

"That's okay," Alphys smiled. "Papyrus is making pancakes!"

At that, Undyne sprang up, "NO WAY!"

Alphys was already halfway down the hall, "Yes way!" She called back. "I am going to eat _so many_."

Undyne smiled after her and when she was gone, she looked down at Frisk, rubbing absentmindedly at her chest. "How you holding up, punk?"

 Frisk shrugged.

"Hey, don't go quiet on us again," Undyne said. "It's been kind of nice to hear your voice, kid."

Frisk smiled, "Alright."

"Great! Now let's get back to the kitchen before Alphy eats them all..."

By the time they got back to the kitchen Papyrus had stacks ready for them, "I couldn't find any syrup," he explained, once they were both sat down. "I was going to put mustard on them, since that's all there is, but Alphys told me not to."

" _Thank you,_ " Undyne mouthed to Alphys.

Alphys nodded to them both, clapping her hands with glee when Papyrus set a plate down in front of her. "Yum!" she declared, picking up her knife and fork. Then she hesitated, "W-wait, don't you want to wait for Sans?"

Papyrus, who had turned back to the pan to start the second batch, froze. "I - uh - think we should allow him to sleep a little longer."

"That might be a good idea,"  Frisk said quietly. "He looked really tired."

"I don't blame him," Undyne muttered. "Make sure you save him some, though."

Papyrus nodded.

Undyne was still rubbing at her chest. Frisk frowned at her but she was far too focussed on her food to pay them much attention. To combat this, Frisk aimed a kick at her shins.

"OW! What the _hell,_ punk?" she squawked.

Frisk looked pointedly at her hand. Alphys looked too.

"You feeling okay?" she asked.

Undyne frowned down at her chest, "I don't know. It...burns kind of? Is that normal?"

Alphys gave her a nervous look, "Monsters aren't supposed to be able to absorb monster souls, none of this is normal." She slid off her chair so she could peer more closely at Undyne's unmarked chest, as though she would see Asriel's soul glowing there too. "Hm... It must be to do with the determination... One minute!" And with that she dashed out of the room, returning briefly a second later to snatch up a pancake to go.

Undyne shared a worried look with Frisk.

When Alphys returned, she was clutching a battered old journal, "I think your determination is wearing off," she said, without looking up. "With humans it seems to be a constant - some more than others - but monsters must experience it differently." She looked up, anxiously, "In little bursts or surges."

"And once it wears off what happens?"

Alphys shook her head, "I don't know. I - I think the stronger soul will start to melt your body, like determination would."

"Right..." Undyne said slowly. "So... All we have to do is find Asriel and give him his soul back, right?"

Alphys nodded cautiously, "It should work. I - I have no idea how we'll be able to put a soul into a flower though..."

"Well, you better start working on it!" Undyne declared, standing. "Frisk, you got any idea where your little flower buddy might be hanging out?"

Frisk nodded, "A  few... I think..." They hoped. Usually, after something big like this they found Asriel in the ruins where they'd first fallen. Where Chara had first fallen. But that was Asriel. This was still Flowey.

They could always try the palace gardens or New Home. They'd find him. They knew they would.

"Great! So, we'll find the flower, Alphy, you work on that soul problem and Pap - "

"I need to watch my brother," Papyrus said hurriedly.

"Yeah, you do that! Come on, Frisk!"

-

" _Man,_ " Undyne mutters. "What I wouldn't give for one of Sans' shortcuts right about now."

Frisk, a few steps ahead of her, shoots her a rueful look. They've been quiet since they got Sans back, like they were before this whole thing. It's kind of unnerving having them go back to communicating mostly through looks and gestures.

" _What_? We've been walking all day and my chest hurts!" Which it _does._ The comfortable warmth she'd felt when she first absorbed the Prince's soul has vanished, replaced by a slow aching burn, getting worse with every step she takes.

Frisk sighs.

"Sorry, punk, I know it's not your fault," Undyne says, rubbing at her chest in a vain attempt at relief. "God, this just _burns._ You really don't feel like this?"

Frisk shakes their head, "I don't know if I have Chara's soul with me though."

Undyne frowns, "Well, if it's not her soul what - " she cuts herself off, shakes her head. "Never mind. Let's just find this dumb flower and get back to Alphys."

Frisk nods.

They're making their way slowly through the Core, heading towards New Home, Frisk had hoped that Flowey would find them, they had told her, but it hadn't happened yet. They're almost out though, almost to the elevators (which Alphys had promised her would be working again.)

Asgore and Toriel were down here somewhere too, Frisk had told her and it had _tugged_ at her in an odd way. It must be the soul inside her. (And it's _definitely_ the soul inside her making her so damn _whiney._ )

"How much _longer_?" she whines, to no one in particular.

When they reach New Home they take an elevator straight to the palace and as it turns out, Frisk is right. Flowey's there, standing (or whatever flowers do) at the foot of the throne.

"So, you're back," he says, without turning around.

Frisk takes a step forwards then they break into a run, coming to halt right behind the flower. Undyne tries to follow but there's a sudden blinding pain that has her on her knees. The soul thunders in her chest, hot and desperate and Undyne tries to speak but she can't.

"You did it then," the flower says quietly. "You got my soul back."

Frisk nods frantically, "I promised."

"Yeah..." he shakes his head. "Did you ever consider this though, Frisk, maybe I don't want it back?" He turns to them finally and his face is split in a sickening grin. "Souls make you w e a k."

Frisk doesn't flinch, "That's not why you're scared though."

"O h? I'm s c a r e d am I?"

Frisk nods, "You're worried that once you have your soul back you won't be able to live with all the things you've done."

The flower's grin falters.

"You think they won't forgive you."

The pain has her doubled over. The soul _aches_ for its body. " _God,_ " she manages to choke out. "Frisk, hurry this up!"

Frisk glances over their shoulder at her with a worried look.

"Yes, Frisk, hurry up. Your friend is d y i n g," the flower giggles.

"They forgave me," Frisk says, when they turn back to the flower. "Undyne forgave me for what I did and - and everyone else will too. They love me and they know that I didn't...Didn't mean it..."

"But you did," the flower says flatly. "At the time you meant it. But it was Chara, really. Every time you killed after that first one, it was her whispering in your ear. It's always been just me."

"You had no soul," Frisk says, "You didn't know what you were doing either. Not really."

The flower looks at Frisk for a very long time and Undyne howls, "FRISK HURRY UP!"

Then, from behind her there is a voice: "Frisk! My child! My dear one!"

Accompanied by another: "You see, dear, I _told_ you there was a flower that could talk!"

And Undyne falls forwards, finally, blissfully, falling unconscious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i mean there's nothing to suggest that papyrus _isn't_ the greatest at making pancakes?
> 
> so the chapters might be a little shorter from now because asriel will be easy to save but i have no idea how i'm going to get gaster back? it'll have _something_ to do with the idea that he's not trapped anywhere he's just scattered everywhere so they just have to like glue him back together in a much more theoretical physics sense but i have no idea how to make that happen :')
> 
> i'll figure it out, i'm determined to give them a happy ending 
> 
> and hey, shorter chapters means more frequent updates!
> 
> also, if you want, hit me up on [tumblr](http://paracosmss.tumblr.com/) maybe? i need more undertale blogs to follow also you can kick me over there if i go too long without an update
> 
> <3


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eek it's been a while, sorry!
> 
> also like 80 of you left kudos on friday what the heck happened?

"Undyne!" Frisk cried, but Toriel ignored this, scooping them up into her arms despite their protests.

"Oh, my dear one!" she whispered, holding them close. "I thought I'd lost you - I thought - " then abruptly, she shifted them, so that she was holding them at arm's length. Her eyes were narrowed and over her shoulder Frisk could see Asgore bent over Undyne, frowning worriedly.

"What on _Earth_ were you thinking!? You could have been _killed_!"

Frisk pawed at her hands, they would apologise later, right now it was Undyne that needed their attention, "Is she okay?" they called to Asgore.

He looked up, brow furrowed, "She won't wake up. Her body is warm - it's strange."

Toriel had turned to and slowly, she lowered Frisk onto the ground, "What happened?"

Frisk walked over to Undyne's still form, knelling beside her, "It's my fault," they said quietly. "She - I - " They looked down at Undyne, she was going to die all because Frisk wasn't strong enough to do this themselves.

"There was someone we left behind when we went up to the surface," Frisk said. "I wanted to save them but I had to get their soul back first."

Asgore stared at them, "Getting someone's soul _back_? But that's impossible!"

Frisk shook their head, "It's a long story. But Undyne absorbed it and now she's going to - " their final words were swallowed by a dry sob.

Toriel was beside them in an instant, "There, there, my child. I am certain Dr Alphys will know what to do, won't she, Asgore?"

On cue, Asgore nodded sternly, "Of course she will! Undyne will be right as rain in no time!" He'd never been a very good liar.

"She won't be able to," Frisk said. "Not in time, anyway. It's burning through her too quickly." They turned back, towards Flowey. Frisk half expected the flower to have vanished but he hadn't. Instead, he was more or less where Frisk had left him, watching them with a stormy expression.

Toriel and Asgore followed their gaze.

"Ah, the talking flower! Howdy!" Asgore greeted.

Toriel's eyes narrowed, "I am sure we've met before..." she said and for a moment, Frisk saw panic in Flowey's eyes. Toriel's hands began to glow with fire. " _You_ are the one I found attacking my child in the ruins, aren't you?"

Flowey's face split into a demonic grin, "And you're the sap that took them in! Proud, are you? You let him wander through this world alone because you were too scared to step out that door! He could have been _killed_! Just like all your other children."

Asgore stood up, slowly drawing his trident. "That's enough now," he said sharply. "I do not wish to fight you, flower, but I shall if I need to."

"And _you_ ," Flowey sneered. "King _Fluffybuns_ , the one who _killed_ six innocent little children. Your _wife's_ six innocent children."

Asgore flinched.

"Did they beg?" Flowey continued, "I know some of them did. The ones that made it to you intact, anyway. The ones you set your little _friends_ on weren't up for talking much after they were through with them, were they?" His face flickered into six different children rapidly. "You would have thought someone like _you_ would have known better. What would your son think of you, hm? Knowing that you turned his death into an excuse for _murder._ "

"You - " Asgore said, weakly. "You need to stop this - "

"Did you ever think about their parents?" He glanced at Toriel with a vicious smirk. "Their _real_ parents? Waiting up there for their children to return? Did you ever think about how much it _hurts_ to die? Because I - " he bit back whatever he was going to say next and rippled forwards.

Asgore drew back, throwing an arm to keep Frisk behind him. "Stay back, Frisk. This flower may be dangerous."

"This flower _is_ dangerous," Toriel corrected, stepping out beside Asgore. "And I will not let it harm Frisk again."

"Toriel," Asgore said in a low voice. "You should get Frisk and Undyne to Alphys. wherever she is. I can handle this."

"Well, as the flower's just pointed out, Asgore, your method of "handling this" might not be the best way," she said, icily.

"Tori..."

Behind them, Frisk sighed, "He's not dangerous. He won't hurt you. He's just..."

"Oh," Flowey interrupted, a flurry of bullets appearing around him. "I'll _hurt_ them, Frisk. I will. You'll see."

"I don't believe you," Frisk said flatly.

Toriel glanced back at them, "Frisk, don't taunt him. It's impolite." She turned back to Flowey, "Especially when it's clearly just a vile, bitter little creature."

Flowey cackled but that remark hurt, Frisk could tell, "Yes, Frisk. Don't taunt the _vile, bitter creature,_ it doesn't know any better!"

Frisk shook their head, "I tried so hard to save you," they said miserably.

"Why would you want to save this creature?" Toriel asked without turning around, hands still aflame. She had relaxed slightly though, she seemed to know as well as Frisk did that Flowey wouldn't attack. Not to wound anyway, maybe as a diversion, but his heart wasn't in it anymore. He'd lost and he knew it. All he was doing now was trying to make sure he took as many of them with him as possible.

"Because of who he is," Undyne croaked. Frisk jerked back in surprise as she cracked one eye open and smirked, "Gotcha, nerd. You really thought I'd go down that easy?" She made to sit up and Frisk hurried to help her. She winced when Frisk had her upright. Frisk could feel her substance rippling beneath their hands, she wouldn't last long.

"You tell them, or I will," Undyne said to Flowey.

Flowey bared his teeth.

" _God,_ and I thought _Mettaton_ was dramatic," she muttered.

"Undyne?" Toriel frowned. "If there is something you wish to tell us to explain the situation then please do. It would be immensely helpful."

Asgore scratched at his beard, "I must admit, I am a little confused."

Undyne sighed, "Look, there's no easy way to say this and I'm sorry you guys had to find out this way - really, I am - but he's your kid."

Toriel froze then, she turned red with fury, "Now, listen here, Undyne, I don't know what you're playing at but - "

But Asgore went very pale and reached out to shush her, "No, no, explain," he said, in a strained voice.

Undyne looked enormously relieved to have escaped Toriel's wrath, "Alphys' experiments - with - with determination and the souls... She knew she'd need a vessel so she tried - "

"One of the flowers from the garden," Asgore finished for her, slowly turning back towards Flowey. "The ones that bloomed after Asriel..."

Toriel clapped her hands to her mouth.

Flowey smirked weakly, "Well, _surprise,_ I guess. Bet you didn't count on your son growing up to be an evil flower, did you? But I suppose looking at how you two ended up, I didn't do so bad."

-

From the hallway, Papyrus watched his brother.

Sans was still in bed, though Papyrus had expected no less from him. He was lying with his back to the hall, still but not sleeping, Papyrus could tell. He'd been watching his brother periodically all morning, unsure of whether or not to go in and talk to him.

It was _absurd_. He - the _Great_ Papyrus - was _uncertain_ of what to do! Though, he should probably cut himself some slack, that last few days - the last few _weeks,_ really - had been _trying._ He'd known there was something wrong with Sans, that there was something his brother wasn't telling him but he'd accepted long ago that Sans would probably never be fully open with him. It just wasn't his brother's way and as frustrating as that could be Papyrus had stepped back - like all good brothers should - and let Sans be, making sure he did everything he could for him in the meantime.

It had been a delicate balancing act but it had worked up until now.

What had changed? What had he missed?

It must have been something small, Papyrus wouldn't have missed it otherwise and he _had_ been spending more and more time helping Undyne teach the children at Toriel's school to protect themselves. Maybe he should have kept a closer eye on Sans but Sans _hated_ that even though he'd never admit to it.

And then there was this _Gaster._ This group of people that made Sans happy, that he missed so much he was willing to _destroy_ himself to rescue.

Papyrus shook his head. It hurt that Sans hadn't trusted him, that Sans hadn't told him about Gaster a long time ago - or maybe he had and Papyrus had forgotten it if Frisk was to be believed (which they of course _were_ , Papyrus wouldn't befriend a _liar._ ) But it hurt more to know that all this time Sans had been in _agony._

"Papy, you know i don't like it when you hover," Sans muttered.

Papyrus jumped, blushing. He'd been caught again.

Sans rolled to face him, "you just gonna stand there all day?"

Taking the hint, Papyrus stepped into the room and crossed it, to sit on the bed next to Sans'.

Sans stared at him for a few beats before speaking, "i don't know what to say, Paps."

"You don't need to say anything," Papyrus told him firmly. "It's me who needs to apologise."

Sans frowned, "what?"

"No, no, don't try and stop me," Papyrus said, with a surge of courage. "It needs to be said! So: I'm sorry, brother, for not noticing you were in pain and for not doing something to prevent you getting to this point and for - " he rubbed the base of his skull sheepishly, "For being an all around terrible brother."

" _Pap_ ," Sans said.

Papyrus took a breath, "You don't need to forgive me - in fact I don't think that you should - "

"no," Sans reached out, gripping Papyrus' wrists. "no, no, Pap, what are ya ...? you don't need to be apologising! it's me - i'm the one who fucked up here, Pap, not you, god - "

"Language," Papyrus scolded, quietly.

"what?" Sans shook his head, " _Papyrus_ , you didn't do anything wrong, you got that? it was _me._ i'm the one who ran off and almost killed myself. you didn't know - there was no way you could've known how bad i was. it wasn't your fault, okay?"

Papyrus shook his head. He _had_ known. "I did though," he confessed. "I did know, brother. I knew something was amiss but I did nothing."

Sans looked lost, "what would you have done, Pap?"

"I could have done something! That's what brothers are supposed to do! We're supposed to make things better for each other!"

"Paps, you did that. every day!"

Papyrus clenched his fists, "But it wasn't _enough_!"

Sans sighed, "bro... it wasn't you, okay? it wasn't that you weren't enough or anything like that. this is about me. it's always been about me. it's about me and my problems and my dumb ass not asking for help when i needed it." He looked away briefly. "it's not like i didn't know you'd help me... it's like... when it first starts it's just a little bit, you're on a boat or whatever and you're drifting away from shore but you can still see it. you can still see everyone there on the beach and they're waving and you could go to them but you're gonna tough it out, they don't need your problems dumped on top of their own right?"

Papyrus frowned, he never liked when Sans got metaphorical it never ended happily, but Sans held up a hand to keep him quiet.

"so you're drifting and you're thinking: this is fine, i can do this and you go a little further, still fine, and it starts to get stormy, kind of hard to see the shore now but you stick it out. so eventually you get so far out you can't see the shore anymore and _that's_ when you look around and you're like _shit,_ i have no idea what to do now but you're too far to call for help, who'd hear ya?"

Papyrus shook his head, "But you _weren't_ on a raft, Sans. You were right there. In the same house."

Sans sighed, "i know, Pap. that's what makes it so messed up." He shook his head, "maybe it's a good thing you don't understand. means you've never felt like that."

Papyrus nodded thoughtfully. This conversation hadn't exactly gone the way he'd hoped it would (which was _not taking place at all_ \- or at least taking place a little later, when Papyrus had worked out how to apologise more thoroughly.) Sans looked even more troubled and Papyrus _hated_ it.

"Even if you were trapped on a raft, I would save you," Papyrus said, tentatively.

At that Sans smiled weakly, "yeah, i know you would, buddy. you did once already, remember? i fell asleep on that one we made in Waterfall when we were kids and got halfway to Snowdin before you caught up with me." He chuckled softly, "The River Person had to save us, remember? you were too tired to paddle and i was too weak."

Papyrus did remember, it had been the first time anyone called him hero. He swelled with pride at the memory, "Of course I remember! And it's why you need to be more careful about where you fall asleep, Sans! Next time you might not be so lucky."

Sans smiled again, "yeah, i'll keep that in mind, buddy."


	16. Chapter 16

**ALPHYS updated status:**

anyone ever noticed that when things go wrong they go SO wrong

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**ALPHYS updated status:**

like its never just your gfs bffs bro going missing

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**ALPHYS updated status:**

its the missing bro AND your gf absorbing a soul

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

AND the human getting in trouble AGAIN

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

i mean reattaching a soul is nbd but getting one OUT??

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

this is all metaphorical ofc

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**ALPHYS updated status:**

we're definitely not back underground playing with souls

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

its a new video game im playing

 **> CoolSkeleton95 **liked this

 ***CoolSkeleton95 commented:** that sounds EXCELLENT where can I play this?

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**ALPHYS updated status:**

..........

**\----**

**ALPHYS updated status:**

so anyway i have to figure out this thing

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

and if i dont the gf might die

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

so NO PRESSURE OR ANYTHING

\----

"I don't understand," Toriel said, very quietly. Frisk reached up and took her hand. She looked down at them briefly, but Frisk wasn't sure she was really seeing them. "I don't understand," she repeated.

Flowey's gazed was fixed on the ground, "Isn't it obvious?" he said softly. "Don't you get it, _Mother_?" He looked up, venom in his gaze. "It was _your_ fault, you know."

Toriel visibly flinched and Asgore stepped forward, "Don't say that!" he cried. "It was _my_ fault. _I_ allowed this to happen."

"Well, _yes,_ " Flowey agreed. "But _she_ let it continue. She knew what you planned to do but did she stop you? No. She just ran away like the _coward_ she is."

"That's enough!" Frisk said, "That wasn't what happened - "

"Oh, wasn't it? She _knew_ what _King Dad_ was trying to do in his lab. She _knew_ he was planning to kill every child that fell into the Underground until he could break the barrier. She cared for those children and then she let them go."

Toriel's hand was shaking in Frisk's and Frisk felt a surge of anger that didn't belong to them. Deep and violent and burning, it felt like Chara's anger, Chara's rage but Chara was quiet and Chara would have no reason to want to defend her once-mother, "Asriel," Frisk growled.

Agore looked guilty, Asgore looked wrecked, "I didn't - " he began. "It wasn't like that..."

Flowey turned his gaze on Asgore, "Oh, no? What was it like then? You always said that you'd find a way to get out of here _without_ violence but now look at you! _Murderer_!"

"I..." Asgore stammered, "I..."

Flowey grinned, "You can't even _deny_ it, can you? You know the truth deep down!" He looked back to Toriel, "And _you -_ " he began but Toriel cut him off.

" _Enough,_ " she commanded and Flowey stuttered to a halt. She let go of Frisk's hand and took a step towards Flowey. "You - _Asriel,_ how...?"

Flowey was struggling to hold her gaze and Frisk knew there was nothing he wanted to do more than runaway but for some reason, he stayed.

"I don't understand," Toriel said, softer now. "If you are truly... If you are truly my son, my _Asriel,_ then why did you not seek me out? Surely you knew where to find me and if I could have helped..."

"I did," Flowey muttered.

Toriel frowned, "I do not remember."

"You wouldn't. I... It's tricky to explain. But I did. I came to you both, over and over again and all it did was make things worse. I was so _angry_ at both of you and nothing you did made me feel better so in the end, I just gave up..."

"He didn't have a soul," Frisk explained. "He couldn't feel anything when he woke up and he thought you could change that."

Toriel looked back at them, her eyes glassy with tears. Then she looked back at her son, "You have no soul?" she repeated. "That must be _awful_."

Flowey's gaze was fixed on the floor again, "Well, it's certainly no walk in the park."

Asgore cleared his throat, "So why didn't you come to us when the barrier was broken?"

Toriel clapped her paws over her mouth, "Oh! We left you down here all alone!"

Flowey chuckled, "Are you kidding me? After the stuff I'd done down here... I couldn't risk it... and I thought you wouldn't forgive me." He added, quietly.

Toriel reached out to him but Flowey flinched back, "We would forgive you for _anything,_ Asriel. You are our son."

Flowey scoffed, "Oh, really? I don't think so. You want to tell them, Frisk? Or should I?"

Frisk stayed silent, this was Flowey's story to tell. But Flowey made no moves to speak.

"Frisk?" Asgore prompted.

"Oh, my god," Undyne mumbled, _"Please_ get on with it."

Frisk sighed, "Just before the barrier broke, when you guys all blacked out, that was him. He absorbed the souls, all of your souls. He was going to destroy the world, both of them but he didn't. I - I reached out to him, I got through and in the end he saved us all. _He_ broke the barrier. It was all him, in the end and he made me promise not to tell you guys, not to go back for him but I couldn't just _leave_ him..."

Toriel sniffed and extended a paw to him, Frisk took and she drew them into her embrace. Asgore ruffled their hair.

"It was the souls," Flowey said, hollowly. "They made me realise what I had... but whatever. That was a long time ago. I'm over it now."

"But now Undyne has your soul," Asgore said, he sounded excited, more excited than Frisk had ever heard him. "Alphys will find a way to get it back to you, I am sure of it!"

" _No_!" Flowey growled. "I don't _want_ it back! Don't you get that, you morons? I don't _want_ to be your simpering, cry baby kid again! He was weak and I'm not! I'm strong, I'm - "

"But why?" Toriel asked, " _Why_?"

"He doesn't think he deserves it," Frisk said quietly, voice mostly muffled by her fur.

Flowey didn't dispute it; instead he bared his teeth in a futile gesture of aggression.

"Oh, _Asriel_ ," Toriel said, tearfully.

Asgore shook his head, "Son, please listen to us..." but he trailed off, lost for words.

"For the love of..." Undyne muttered. With difficulty she dragged herself over to them and after a meaningful look from Toriel Asgore bent to heft her upright and she leant against him, panting.

"Look, Flowey - Asriel, _whatever_ you like to be called these days, you might not deserve this soul. I dunno, but from what Frisk's told me, you're not all that great but _that doesn't matter._ You know who does deserve this? Your Mom, who is, by the way, _not_ a coward. She's actually a kickass teacher and a kickass boss and so what if she screwed up a little? She'd just lost her _kids._ Both of 'em. In the same _day._ That's enough to earn her some leeway, yeah? And your dad, he deserves this too. And yeah, he screwed up too but he was looking out for an _entire race._ You think that's easy? And anyway, that took a toll on him and I think you know that, punk, so ease up on him, alright? They both deserve this. They deserve their kid back, they _deserve_ to be happy again and you know who else deserves this?" she paused, whether for dramatic effect or to catch her breath, Frisk wasn't sure.

"Frisk. Frisk deserves this because they've been through hell and back _over_ and _over_ again for you and trust me, I know because I was along for the ride for some of it, and they did that all for _you._ So maybe you're an asshole, maybe you're the last flower in both worlds that deserves a soul but you owe it to them so man the hell up and come back to the lab so we can get this thing out of me."

"Please," Toriel added.

Flowey was silent.

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

my life has become an anime

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

im literally about to save a princes life

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

and my princesses life too ofc

 **> StrongFish91 ** liked this

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

only problem is ive never done this before

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

and its kind of a big deal if i screw up

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

protip: always do trial runs of dangerous experiments before doing them on you gf and your boss's child

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

when you have time that is

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

PRAYER CIRCLE EVERYONE GOOD VIBES LUCKY CHANTS I NEED THEM ALL

\----

**ALPHYS uploaded a photo:**

[a large red button with Alphys' hand on it]

the caption reads: here goes everything!!!!

 **> CoolSkeleton95 **& **StrongFish91** liked this

 **> StrongFish91 commented: **don't blow me up okay? i cant smooch you if you blow me up

\----

The former DT extractor whirred to a halt and in the smoke, none of them could see much.

"Oh my gosh," Alphys muttered, stepping away from the control panel and wringing her hands. "Oh my gosh, I don't know if that was s-supposed to happen!"

"I'm sure it will be fine," Asgore said, though his voice was tight and his wide-eyed expression (and tight grip on Toriel's hand) suggested he wasn't so certain of that.

"YES! I am sure you have done excellently!" Papyrus boomed. "Only _I_ could have done better, if I knew how to science, that is!" Gently, he patted Alphys on the shoulder. Sans, beside Frisk, said nothing.

Frisk held their breath as the smoke began to clear.

Undyne lay on a bench on one side of the machine, one of its ghoulish arms extended out over her prone form. Flowey had been placed on the other side. Both of them were still and for a moment, Frisk began to panic. It hadn't worked. The machine had malfunctioned - they were both dead or worse - and judging by Alphys' hitching breath, she thought the same but then, then -

Undyne groaned, "Oh my _god,_ I am going to _hurl._ "

Alphys yelped and dove for a bucket but it was too late, Undyne leant over the edge of the bench and wretched violently, just as Alphys reached her side.

"H-How're you feeling?" Alphys asked, grasping one of her hands.

"Not great," Undyne admitted but she smiled, "But I think that extra souls gone. Hopefully, mines still in there."

Alphys turned pale at the suggestion.

"I'm just kidding, Alphy!" she leant forwards and pressed a kiss to Alphys' cheek. "I think I'd know if I had no soul."

"I h-hope so," Alphys said, nuzzling against her.

"How's the little prince?" Undyne asked.

Frisk turned to look. Toriel and Asgore had approached Flowey's bench, Flowey remained motionless, roots hanging limply off the edge of the bench. _Come on,_ Frisk thought. _Come on._

Flowey began to glow.

It wasn't like before, there was no blinding flash of light and magic, this time it was gradual: stems and leaves twisted into arms and legs, petals became ears, green became white, roots became a tail.

Asriel sat up and stared mutely at his hands.

With joint cries, Toriel and Asgore threw their arms around their son.

Frisk wanted to join them but Papyrus grabbed them and pulled them into a tight hug. "OH HUMAN! Isn't it wonderful!" he yelled, sniffing messily. "We did it!"

\----

**ALPHYS uploaded a photo:**

[Undyne kissing Alphys' cheek. In the background, Asgore and Toriel embracing a barely visible figure]

i did it :')

\----

you figure you're supposed to be overjoyed about this.

the dreamurrs got their kid back, Frisk saved the day, Undyne didn't melt into a fishy puddle of goop and Alphys got her groove back, or something. and you are, you are, its freaking _great_ (even though you still kinda wanna let that former-flower know what a gaster blaster feels like and hey, you're entitled to that, maybe) but it's great.

its the happy ending they all deserve and Pap's loving it, cooking for all of them, joking around with Undyne and arguing with Asgore about whether spaghetti is really necessary for a perfect cup of tea.

they're all careful to smile around you, to make you feel like you're not the idiot that almost killed them all and instead, you're the idiot who set this all in motion, who led to their happy family reunion.

you smile back (you're always smiling anyway, kinda stuck that way in fact, so it's not hard to fake) and you've always known this would end badly.

you were never gonna get Gaster back but at least tori got her son back. at least they're happy and once upon a time, wasn't that all that mattered?

anyway, you head to bed early, not to sleep just to sort of lie there and will yourself not to collapse into a sobbing mess again and Pap comes and talks to you for a while and that's nice but you really, really want to be alone right now.

you feel drained, like you're running on empty and this is gonna be if for you from now on. shuffling about half-dead (well, fully dead but ya know) until you keel over (if skeletons keel over at all) or until there's no one else to keep you from offing yourself.

you can do that, you think. you can do that for them. they deserve it.

you're still in bed when the kid comes to find you. not Frisk, the other one. the one with fur and things.

he stands in front of you, scuffing his feet and keeping his head bowed and his eyes are kind of teary (and they're toriel's you notice, absently, wide and rich and warm) and then he says: _back when I could do what Frisk does - did I- I helped you, you know. I - We - uh_

he bites his lip, fidgets with the hem of his stripped shirt, _we got him back. G-gaster, i mean. we got him back._

you close your eyes, _sure, kid. sure we did._

 _no, we did! we did! i swear! i - i can do it again,_ he says and you crack open an eye and want to destroy him for dangling this in front of you.

 _i swear it,_ the kid says, _and i'm gonna prove it._


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there are probably other people on undernet BUT

**PrinceDreamurr created an account.**

**> FrisktheHuman, StrongFish91, CoolSkeleton95 ** & **ALPHYS** liked this

\----

**Toriel created an account**

\----

**KingDreamurr created an account**

**> PrinceDreamurr commented: **real original dad!

 **> KingDreamurr replied: **oh sorry!

\----

**KingDreamurr account name changed to RoyalTeaLover**

**> PrinceDreamurr **& **FrisktheHuman** liked this

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

how do you save someone who technically doesn't exist?

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

its not a riddle im genuinely asking

**> PrinceDreamurr replied with a photo:**

[Asriel in a lab coat]

caption: with help!

 **> Friskthe human ** & **RoyalTeaLover** likes this

 **> Toriel commented: ** gloves and goggles young man!

 **> PrinceDreamurr replied: ** yes mom ¬_¬

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

one more to save and then home <3

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

just to reiterate that whole "my life is an anime" thing

i am currently trying to save someone who was wiped out of existance

with a prince who was once a flower

 **> PrinceDreamurr ** liked this

 **> FrisktheHuman ** liked this

\----

**StrongFish91 uploaded a photo:**

[Alphys is bent over a desk with Asriel beside her, both look engrossed]

Caption: smartest girl in the world saving the day again

\----

**StrongFish91 uploaded a photo:**

[Undyne and Papyrus are sat against a wall, Undyne is pulling a sad face, Papyrus looks happy as ever]

Caption: not allowed to join in :(

 **> ALPHYS commented: ** you blew up an /empty flask!/

\----

**Toriel updated status:**

**@PrinceDreamurr, @Friskthehuman** do your shoes have holes in them?

 **> PrinceDreamurr commented: ** um no?

 **> Toriel replied: ** then how did you get your feet in them!

 **> FrisktheHuman **liked this

\----

**Toriel uploaded a photo:**

[Frisk and Asriel smiling]

caption: luckiest mama in two worlds :)

 **> RoyalTeaLover **likes this

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

wwmmkkd? = what would mew mew kissy kitty do? answer: own!

\----

**Toriel uploaded a photo:**

[a freshly baked quiche]

caption: trying to cheer up my favourite bonehead

 **> CoolSkeleton95 commented: **ME?

 **> FrisktheHuman commented: **@ **sansybones**

 **> sansybones commented: **ty tor

 **> CoolSkeleton95 commented: **:(

 **> Toriel replied: ** dont worry papyrus! ive got something for you too!

\----

**Toriel uploaded a photo:**

[a spaghetti pie, no snails visible]

 **> CoolSkeleton95 commented: **ITS GLORIOUS

\----

**ALPHYS uploaded a photo:**

[sans is at a work table, head bent low over some notes]

caption: look who's helping!

\----

**ALPHYS uploaded a photo:**

[Alphys, sans and Asriel in lab coats]

caption: #TEAMSCIENCE!

**> RoyalTeaLover liked this**

**> StrongFish91 commented: **oh yeah?

\----

**StrongFish91 uploaded a photo:**

[Undyne, Frisk and Papyrus in homemade capes]

caption: **#TEAMHERO**

**> RoyalTeaLover liked this**

**\----**

**Toriel uploaded a photo:**

[Toriel standing, everyone else bowing to her]

caption: #teammom ]:-)

 **> RoyalTeaLover, StrongFish91, CoolSkeleton95, Friskthehuman, PrinceDreamurr, sansybones **& **ALPHYS liked this**

\----

**ALPHYS updated status:**

so with the help of **@PrinceDreamurr** and **@sansybones** we may have just cracked this

\----

**ALPHYS uploaded a photo:**

[an odd looking machine, a little like sans' time machine but tweaked]

caption: ta da!

 **> MoreGlamThanYou commented: ***sigh* do i even want to know darling?

 **> ALPHYS replied: **you'll find out soon enough B) how's the tour going?

 **> MoreGlamThanYou commented: **ill pm u

\----

**sansybones uploaded a photo:**

[everyone gathered around the strange machine]

caption: here goes nothing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> everytime i tried to type this out it ended up awful, which is partly why this took so long! so i hope this is okay for you guys, i know its not the ending you deserve but you do deserve an ending 
> 
> also, do you think the title "here goes nothing" would work better for this fic?


	18. Chapter 18

Frisk drew their knees up to their chest and exhaled, their breath misting the chilly air in front of them.

Asriel sighed, "Come on, Frisk! It's been an _hour_ and nothing's happened. Let's go back inside, I'm cold!"

Frisk gave him a pointed look.

Asriel smiled, puffing up his fur, "Okay, okay, I get it. But come on, maybe it's time to give up." He huddled deeper into his coat, glancing nervously around. Asriel was still a little uncomfortable on the surface; Asriel was still a little uncomfortable with being Asriel.

It had been a month since they returned with him and Frisk knew a month wasn't _that_ long in the grand scheme of things but it felt like a lifetime. No one had been all that surprised when Asriel returned, scattered as the monster now was the lives of their former King and Queen just weren't as important anymore. It was nice, Frisk thought. It gave them a chance to be normal for once.

The few that had cared had been overjoyed, they'd thrown a huge party for them all and Asgore had made a speech that left most monsters a little teary. Asriel himself hadn't wanted to speak. He still felt guilty about everything he'd done as Flowey and Frisk wasn't sure he'd ever shake it.

He was getting better though, little by little. The first few weeks he hadn't even left their house now at least he'd accompany Toriel to the store down the street or sit in the garden with Frisk. Baby steps. Soon he'd be back to his regular self.

It was strange, Frisk had never really known Asriel, he'd known Flowey but they felt like they knew him already. They knew his favourite foods and stories and games he liked to play. But they also knew the easiest ways to make him cry, the ways to talk him into things. Frisk rubbed their chest, Chara's locket still cool against his skin.

"I'm not giving up," they told Asriel. "No one gets left behind, remember?"

Asriel snorted, "Don't I know it."

They looked up at the snowman before them. Carrot nose, coal eyes, a scarf knitted by Papyrus and a hat knitted by Toriel, everyone had pitched in to build him and when they were done Frisk had retrieved the piece they'd saved and placed it in a carefully dug nook in the snowman's chest. They hoped it would work.

"Suppose it's just Chara left now," Asriel said softly. Frisk looked over at him. He didn't speak about Chara much, to Frisk at least, but he and Toriel and Asgore had planted a tree in the garden and a row golden flowers beneath it for her. Of course, since it was winter the tree was dead and flowers dormant, but Frisk had seen all of them go out to it and talk quietly to their lost daughter.

They had agreed with Asriel that Toriel and Asgore didn't need to know about Chara's plan. They had been through without that to deal with too.

Frisk shook their head, rubbing at the locket again. "I don't think she's here anymore. I mean, she's _here_ but it's less like a separate person and more like - I don't know - just _feelings_?"

It was impossible to explain. Before they had known Chara was there, just waiting to be called forth now there was something that lingered but Frisk wasn't sure it was her. More like her ghost. Her essence. A few memories and feelings, maybe she'd finally moved on.

"That sounds weird," Asriel said.

It _felt_ weird, but Frisk didn't need to tell Asriel that.

Again, Asriel shifted, "It is so dang _cold_ ," he muttered. "Even Snowdin wasn't this bad!"

"You go in, then," Frisk said.

Asriel looked at them, "No, I can't do that. What kind of brother would that make me?"

Frisk grinned, "A warm one?"

"True!" Asriel laughed, he looked back towards the house. "Hey, why don't we both go in? Mom'll make us hot coco and we can keep an eye on the snowman from the back windows?"

Frisk looked up at the snowman and then back at the house. It _was_ cold and they would be able to see from the back windows... They were just about to agree when the snowman made a soft noise of surprise.

"Oh my! Well, _this_ certainly isn't Snowdin Forest."

-

here you are again, in some basement lab, tinkering with things you don't quite understand.

your brother is out with Undyne and Alphys learning to ski and you bet he'll do great at it, even be good enough to compete someday if he wants to and he's disappointed you're not there with him but he knows you need your space now. hell, who wouldn't after the shit you've been through.

Frisk's outback with Asriel who might not be the asshole you thought he was now he's got his soul back and Tori's up there too watching romcoms with Asgore. she could definitely do better, in your humble opinion but whatever. she's happier than you've ever seen her (which, lets keep in perspective here, you've known her all of a year not counting your interaction through a door) so you're not gonna burst her bubble.

(you are going to enjoy wrecking asgore if he screws her over again though.)

and that's that. that's your little family in a nutshell and sans (hehe) you, anyway.

so here you are, while life goes on around you, in your little basement laboratory only, you're not alone this time.

He's scribbling out some frenzied blueprints and talking - more than himself to you - a constant burble of words and numbers and hypotheses and theories and every now and again he'll look over his shoulder at you and ask you something and you're still half convinced this is a dream.

he can't really be here.

you must have dreamt him up.

you must have hit your head or something.

but then Frisk's throwing open the door and climbing carefully down the stairs saying, _sans, gaster, mom made b.scotch pie and she says you can't do complicated science on an empty stomach!_

and Gaster's smiling and reaching out to try and touch Frisk (his hand goes right through that's what you're working on right now, he's back but he's not, he's there but he's not and you're okay with that, really you are, he'll figure this out, you're sure) and saying, _it's not all that complicated, little one._

 _besides,_ you add, _it's not like Mr Incorporeal over there needs to eat._

Gaster shakes his head, _but you do and besides, i enjoy the aroma._

he vanishes (he can do that now, it damn near gave you a heart attack the first few times he did that) and probably reappears upstairs. Frisk meets your gaze and you both roll your eyes.

you kind of hate it when he does that.

you kind of love it when he does that.

 _come on, sans, chop chop!_ he shouts. _we cannot afford to waste more time!_

you mock salute, not that he can see you and bark, _sir, yes sir!_ before marching up the stairs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for sticking with this story to the end you guys are awesome <3
> 
> im really tempted to rework this whole thing and i might someday but for now, we're at the end, hope you enjoyed this bumpy ride!


End file.
